Simplifying Life - Mark II

mary43

Lula - oh how I envy you with those tidy drawers............mine don't bear thinking of at the minute in my little 'den'............one drawer fit to bursting with craft/card papers and 'bits' -seriously needs sorting out. Can't get my head round that at the minute though with all this 'mum' stuff around.
Went to the dentist this morning and had the front tooth out - all was well for an hour then it kept on bleeding - ended up back at the dentist this afternoon thinking he'd have to put a stitch in it and when he looked he said all was ok........... Maybe bit of overeaction on my part.
Still, during the time I was sat with a mouth full of cotton wool I got around to writing several letters -thankyou ones to a couple of friends of mums for the sympathy cards (never quite sure if thats the right thing to do but it felt right for me), wrote to youngest son and sent him back the little teddy he got his nan when she was first ill to try and get her to squeeze her hand together, one to solicitor with papers she needed, one to baby grandson with a growing chart I'd got as a freebie............OH is posting them all tomorrow - I look too much like a witch to venture out !!
Not sure what to do with teddy teenage grandchildren bought my mum - it was in a bucket with some shower/soap stuff...........grandson was at the funeral and I asked would he like it back...........he said 'yes' straight away - ooops..........one teddy - two grandchildren what do I do ? Well, I can only think of sorting through mums necklaces and giving one to grandaughter, grandson would love one of his grandads little pen knives so might put teddy with that...........oh we'll see. If I think too much I'll get confused..........lol
Well, scrambled eggs for tea..............can't eat much else till I've got my teeth back.................lol:rotfl:

You can';t beat lavender...........lovely varieties and very low maintenance:T

ceridwen

Hi Mary

Sorry to see that bit re the wording on the headstone - oooh dear....a bit highhanded of Bruv....but I guess you've worked out the best way to respond to that by now from your point of view...

I guess one positive "take" on things now - is that there are enough mementos to pass onto those who want one by the sound of it...shame one teddybear doesnt go between two people - but basically it sounds like there is enough that everyone can have something to remember your mum by.

Anyways....Bruv will soon be back in Spain and a bit of "peace" then in that respect is due...

Mary....I wouldnae worrit meself too much re the way that tooth looks right now - 'tis only temporary....and your comment about looking "like a witch" - on this yur thread some of us might regard it as a compliment:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: only joking ...

You are doing a lot better at dealing with this than back when with your father's stuff - so a lot of "progress" is visible here....and anyways its not like theres some sort of time limit on this....you take whatever time you feel you need to take....

mary43

ceridwen - big bruv had sent me a text message about headstone wording - my response was to not reply............if I had they'd have been an ongoing argument and it really isn't worth it. And he'd have got a reaction from me - this way he didn't. He'll be back in Spain by now (relief ) and I'm taking a day away from mums stuff. I've done all the paperwork that needed doing, stuff that needed to go into fam.history file is there now - photos in a loose envelope at the minute are ones that mum had framed round the flat. They can go in respective photo albums maybe this afternoon or tomorrow (I've got a little check list.........lol) Her mums brass inkwell is on the china cabinet next to her photo along with a tiny silver jewelly box.
Think I'll need a shoe box for some bits and pieces just to keep them all in one place. I want to keep the sympathy cards I got as well so they can all go together. I've even got a shoe box thats empty - bit of pretty paper on it and that will be another job done.
I'll let the two grandchildren argue between themselves about the teddy. Think I'll send it to grandson with one of my Dads tiny little pen knives that he'd love, grandaughter will have necklace..........I've got a list (me and my lists) about who I'd like to have what.
Ooops........just noticed three bibles that need to go in grans bible box with the rest -how many bibles does any one person need ? They all seem to have been given one for all sorts of reasons..............lol
At least now I can see my desk...................lol


I know I've plenty of time to do all this but if I don't do it now it will hang around for years. Done enough for now though so today I'm attempting a scrapbook of garden quotes to go in garden hamper for foster daughter's birthday end of march. Be nice to do something different for a change.

Area of tooth extraction feels tons better today..........just hope the one to replace it is ok and I don't end up looking like a horse.............lol:rotfl:

Lula-Hula

Hello virtual friends & what a beautiful sunny afternoon here

I've now started my second job & am really enjoying getting out & just walking about nosing at peoples houses & front gardens . I've also started counselling which was fine although made me a bit wobbly & unsure what I was meant to be focusing on... apparently this is normal though.

Mary - It sounds as though you are coping well with distributing mementoes to your family & glad to hear that you are allowing people to squabble amongst themselves rather than allowing yourself to get twisted up.

I have'mt done much simplifying other than donating a bag full of bric a brac to the charity who collect & was delighted to get a leaflet today from an organisation that's collecting electrical stuff - I'm hoping to get rid of the tumble dryer that's been sat in my shed for about 3 years now ( You'll be pleased to hear that I decided not to bother replacing it & frankly havent missed it at all )

I've been concentratign on simplifying the outdoor areas & have now filled up some pots with pansies & primroses & also managed to get a lavender plant, that for now is in a pot. I've also been weeding & deleafing the beds & am so happy to be up to my knees in mud :j

Good luck with your new tooth Mary, I'm sure every effort will be made to match it your others

wishing everyone a happy week end

lula

mary43

Lula - glad your counselling is going ok. When I went last year it was all a bit daunting and the tears flowed but the counsellor was so nice and I soon felt able to open up and pour it all out and somehow make sense of it all.

We've cleared out the picture frames from Mums - kept the photos for the album but I've no room for anything else on the walls. Charity shop were thrilled to bits with them and OH took some more odds and ends down this morning.

Yet another form to fill in yesterday to send off to the solicitor so thats another bit done. Had e mail from big bruv this afternoon - he''d had info from solicitor and how he read it seems like it would take a year to sort everything out. Can't quite see where he got that from. We were told to let the care home know as soon as the flats cleared so things can be dealt with..........maybe a bit of over reaction on his part. Hope so.........the thought of it being a year before I feel the paperwork and legal stuff is dealt with and I can start to concentrate on my life drives me daft ! And doesn't help with simplifying my brain at all.
We've had thoughts of the 'outside' -must be the sunshine - we had a plant catalogue through the door and OH has ordered some tree lilies.........said he needed something to spur him on, get him motivated. I'd already ordered 3 potato tubs for him...........maybe that seems a bit boring................lol
Started my garden journal anyway and stuck piccys in of what I've ordered and the dates, plus remarks about the weather. Always handy to compare with what it was like last year. Haven't actually got around to the 'weeding' bit yet though.Ex foster lad normally does that for us -must give him a ring.

Tooth fits in nicely.............now I can smile........mind you, was glad to give my mouth a bit of a rest this morning when there was no-one here.....:rotfl:

So, all is going ok..............just this legal business over mums flat thats a bit of a nightmare. I'll know more next week.

ceridwen

Mary - just to say good luck with the sorting-out. Guess the photos are probably what you want most - so glad you have some. Hope the legal bit isnt going to take as long as that.......:eek: . I dont quite get what the set-up is re your mum's flat? Was she renting a self-contained flat from this home - or owned it....? Just a bit confused here ....

LULA - Glad the counselling has started - good luck with it..

mary43

ceridwen - the flats in the confines of a care home, all under one roof along with several more and mum bought it, the agreement being that it would be bought back by the home for the same price. All mod cons were there, mum just had her own pieces of furniture and stuff like that.
Might not be half the nightmare brother is making it sound like but all this legal stuff is a bit over his head and mine. I'll know more next week.
When we go down on Tuesday we're calling in to see Mums friend and letting her pick which earings or necklace she'd like rather than just give her something that might not be to her taste. Mums stepbrother got the bibles and war letters today about mums brother -he was so pleased.........I'd even found stuff with his mums name in (mums stepmum) so at least they've all gone to what I feel, and so would mum, their rightful home.
So I'm getting there as far as the 'letting go' of stuff goes.
Sent off some photos of my two sons when they were little playing in mums garden. I could have left it a while but felt if I don't send them now I'll either forget where I've put them or just forget altogether.
Must admit I've surprised myself..............firstly didn't think I'd actually want to bring so much home but glad I did, and secondly that I'm able to give it up so easily. I do have some books as well.............might do for MIL if she hasn't read them......must phone her tomorrow and ask.

So...........giving myself a pat on the back :j

ceridwen

Well....Mary....'tis further signs of the progress you're making methinks....ie the letting things go more easily...:T

mary43

ceridwen - thanks:undecided Got a way to go yet I think but pleased to say I'm getting there and its thanks to you all on here for keeping me going when things get tough and Arils quote from way back about the rocking chair. I'll always rememer that one.:o

Lula-Hula

Evening all,

Just popping in to say - I've come across a new way of simplifying : when the sun shines - abandon the house & all the chores it entails & head outside . Another border cleared & tidied including DDs litle patch under the lime tree, cant wait for the new leaves so we can try munching on them. Have lived here for years with giant tree & only while watching Ray Mears last year did I discover we could eat them :rolleyes:

Went for a gorgeous walk this afternoon to a nearby ancient yew tree, snowdrops everywhere, & daffs & bluebells will be out very soon - absolutely beautiful, spirit refreshed & soul nourished

blessings

lula
xx