what was the worse thing about being pregnant...

Deals_2

or having had kids for women. i would be curious whether it was the financial aspect of either being a single mum or being dependent on someone else. would running one's own business be a better solution so it gives flexible time etc.

squashy

I would have thought that running a business would mean more stress, not less. For example, working for an employer you are entitled to paid time off for antenatal appointments, sick pay if there is anything the dr is worried about during pregnancy then of course maternity leave and pay. Even with young children, employers can be pretty flexible about emergency time off to look after poorly little ones.

I have worked on a "flexitime" basis which was good, but even better than that I now work term time only which is a dream. I would rank that very highly in terms of my work/life balance and general satisfaction.

The worst thing about being pregnant? Varicose veins!

maytaurus

pre-eclampsia/eclampsia

Becles

I would say being self employed is worse than being employed for pregnant ladies.

You don't get paid time off for ante-natal care, you just have to juggle your work around and fit the appointments in.

I'd arranged maternity allowance to be paid from 36 weeks, but I was poorly and stopped work earlier. Then I had the hassle of filling in forms and dealing with the benefits people to get the MA paid from an earlier date. An employer would have done that for me.

You can't do any work at all, apart from 10 "keeping in touch" days while you are claiming MA. Some of my clients moved on and found other people to do the work while I was on maternity leave. If you are employed say 35 hours a week at £7 an hour, when you finish maternity leave you walk straight back into 35 hours at £7 an hour. If you are self employed, you walk straight back into a lower salary as you have to start building up your client base again and find new clients to replace ones who've moved on.

Gingham_Ribbon

Well, the worsening asthma and being unable to walk as a bind.
The tachycardia of up to 180bpm wasn't fun.
The hyperemesis and throwing up one to two dozen times a day for 9 months wasn't a blast.
Having the head of a 10lb4 baby engaged for 6 weeks could have been more fun.
Spending half my time in hospital was not easy for my older one.
Going into early labour and having injections and pills to stop it was scary.
Having painful contractions several times an hour for a MONTH before I went into labour proper was quite debilitating.
Having a back labour and complications with my first that meant that an epidural and then a spinal didn't work and needing a general to get him here after a 3 day labour wasn't fun.
Having internal scans every fortnight for several weeks because my cervix was 'borderline incompetent' was a bit of a strain.
Getting a UTI that over 2 years on still hasn't shifted is worrying.
Having to give up my job when I was pregnant with my first because I was too ill to work wasn't so bad really. I didn't like my job anyway.

Totally worth it though.

Alikay

Fear. From the minute I announced my first pregnancy it seemed everyone wanted to regale me with stories of horror deliveries..." it was like going to hell and back"..."I was torn from front to back"...."enjoy bladder control while you still have it!"...that sort of thing!!

I was absolutely petrified! Since then I've always been very careful what I say to any pregnant ladies - and always point out that most women go on to have 2 or 3 children...Would anyone really repeat the ordeal if it had been that bad?

starbump

The worst thing about being pregnant *IS* being pregnant! Nothing to do with finances or family situation (although, of course, loads of money and a large supportive family are a bonus). You feel sick all the time, it's achingly heavy to lug all the weight around, you're eating non-stop, constantly in the bathroom, extra emotional and then you have to give birth and spend ages recovering. However, you get a beautiful baby out of it so it is worth it.

Gingham_Ribbon

Alikay wrote: »

Would anyone really repeat the ordeal if it had been that bad?

Well, to be fair, sometimes it really IS that bad. We gave it another shot hoping it would be better this time round. It wasn't so now we can't have any more, though we'd like to. But we count ourselves very lucky to have 2 wonderful children.

manda1205

I actually thought my pregnancy was fine, no complications (although I ate a lot of chocolate so put on a lot of weight!) It was the birth that was terrible, and even 4 years on I am still 100% sure I will have no more children! I ended up with a c-section and I totally blame the hospital for leaving me and not really paying attention to me. (Although Im sure most others have much better experiences so dont be put off by me!)
I am now really looking forward to working again, but all I can do is get a job that is term time. I have no one to look after DD after nusery (school next year) so Id ahve to pay some one. And my view is that I chose to have her so I should be the one looking after her. I wouldnt want anyone else picking her up from school and cooking her tea! Thats my job! So I will wait for a suitable term time job to show and hopefully get one!

LilMissEmmylou

erm being sick wasnt fun although i know some people can get by without being sick or arent sick much at all, others of us just arent as fortunate and puke at the smell of nothing and end up on drips lol.

Although in all honesty the real downside for me.... lack of sleep! More so after DD was born! she still wakes me up frequently making noises in the night and shes 20 months now!

elainew

will never moan about being pregnant after 9 years of IVF and the loss of 3 presious babies.
I felt blessed the whole time even if i did feel sick as a dog