Parents can deal with uni applications

jay11_2

CLAPTON wrote: »

I see no such stark alternatives; in real life there is a gradual evolution from the state of childhood to that of mature adult.... and of course different individuals and different circumstances require different strategies.. and its multi dimensional ... completely adult in some respects and babes in others..

and

driving ... what about the huge death rate of young (OK mainly male drivers)
driving yes but beating up people too?
scewing ... yes but rape too?
debt... surely a little guidance and education and help is the way here
voting... well......

Bejesus...most of the young people I know are fab, responsible, sensible albeit young, adults. Are you implying that rape and violence is mainly committed by youngsters?

melancholly

jay11 wrote: »

Bejesus...most of the young people I know are fab, responsible, sensible albeit young, adults. Are you implying that rape and violence is mainly committed by youngsters?

it seems that past 30 (pure guess on what the cut off is) you become a 'better' person!

Oldernotwiser

CLAPTON wrote: »

I see no such stark alternatives; in real life there is a gradual evolution from the state of childhood to that of mature adult....

I quite agree, only, for me, that's what your teenage years should be about!

tootiefrooties

In a Sociology of Education course which I took last year, the lecturer gave her personal experiences on the globalisation of education: many international students who did poorly in their grades would have their parents come in and attempt to bribe her with money, genuinely believing that she would change the grade! Apparently this is common in a lot of countries so they thought they could do it here too. And she's now seeing a similar occurence amongst home students because of high tuition fees - they think that because the degree has been paid for, it should be awarded to them (whether they have worked for it or not). I wonder how long before these pushy parents start demanding meetings in the same way as the parents of some of the international students have done...

It's bloody ridiculous. Talk about living through your children!

When I applied to uni 3 years ago, one or two of my friends were constantly in tears because they had zero say (as far as they were concerned) in what uni they went to. Parents chose the shortlist, then vetted them all on open days, and ultimately made the decision. I remember being in the car with my friend and her mum as she said "oooh campus xxxx looked brilliant" and her mum chipped in, "no - we didn't like that one, remember".

I suppose it's a by-product of parents making a financial contribution, that they get obsessed over where that money is being spent. Tends not to be the case if they are supplementing the student loan, but when the rich parents pay for the student's tuition fees it is definitely a control situation.

olibrofiz

OMG I would have been ashamed & horrified if my dad had muscled in.

Sadly parents wanting to dictate what goes on with their child when they're at Uni is becoming more and more common. It may be a good thing tho in that parents will get the truth, ie your childs been skipping lessons, handing in essays copied of the web, has actually left etc, etc at the beginning rather than tying up Uni staff with complaints and threats. That's just SOME students btw.

Also, interestingly, students are becoming more of the attitude 'I've paid for this so you should fit around me' when they've missed umpteen lectures and don't get the grade they want.

In my mind if you pay for the tuition, you take advantage of it and actually ATTEND, don't go whining to mummy & daddy. IME mature students tend to do well as they REALLY want to be there.

The_One_Who

I didn't let my parents have anything to do with my university choices, and they left me to it. It was my choice to go and so it is my responsibility to find out about it and do everything for it. They only thing they did was give me their financial details.

Rosie75

As one of my colleagues pointed out to a hapless student - "if you're old enough to get yourself killed in Iraq, you're old enough to get yourself to a lecture".

Swirlywurly

What a nightmare. I'm glad my mum trusted me enough to let me get on with it. Until recently I worked for my university and I had a number of times when parents came looking for their children and I had to turn them away due to confidentiality. I was then in the firing line. People need to work on their relationships with their children, not take it out on institutions which are meant to encourage independance.

Voyager2002

I suppose it gives the parents the feeling of being young again, with their whole lives before them. And since they are paying for it, why not?

melancholly

Voyager2002 wrote: »

I suppose it gives the parents the feeling of being young again, with their whole lives before them. And since they are paying for it, why not?

hehe maybe the parents should come along and support them during freshers' week too?! make sure they drink a pint of water before bed and hold their hair out the way while they throw up in the morning!