4 days to go wedding rant!

coolio_2

I hope your soon to be husband/wife knows what they're marrying. A bereavement in the family will ALWAYS come before a wedding, and I don't think I'm alone.

Timmne

coolio wrote: »

I hope your soon to be husband/wife knows what they're marrying. A bereavement in the family will ALWAYS come before a wedding, and I don't think I'm alone.

That kind of opinionated nonsense is totally unfair - I'd like to see you step from behind your computer to say that to the OP.

I see where the OP is coming from - it's not that people have selfishly died, it's that she's been let down at the last minute. It's not why you've been let down that's the problem, just that it happened at all, regardless of the reason.

It's not a case of being self obsessed. I'm sure the OP has genuine sympathy for the bereaved but this late in the day, anyone dropping out will annoy the couple planning the wedding.

december

I don't usually venture into discussions like this but I must admit that the way that the OP came across was not as she had sympathy for those who may have lost loved ones, more that she doubted that they had suffered a bereavement. To be honest, after having recently lost a loved one, I would also have texted and not called. You have so many things going through your mind that a call to someone about their wedding might not be top of the list. Also I would hope that the people who's wedding it was would understand that.

December

Speckled_Egg

Well, one of my friends (who I don't see that much anymore) said she couldn't come to my hen night as it was in the middle of her two week summer holiday. That was fine, I was quite happy with that.

When she missed the deadline for our RSVP, I sent an email to ask if she was coming. Her reply was, "No, I'm really sorry my single parent sister with five kids has breast cancer so we can't, blah, blah, blah....."

In light of the situation, the fact that she can go on holiday for two weeks but not come to our evening reception from 19.30 to 23.00 is a bit beyond my comprehension really. My understanding of the situation is that she just doesn't want to come. I hope that she proves me wrong and gets in touch soon but I doubt it somehow. Anyway, the ball's in her court. Until then, she's off the Christmas card list.

Focus on the friends and family who love and support you and forget about those people who really don't care. This is a great time to clear out the dead wood in your life!

:rotfl:

Stephb1986_2

Atleast this way you get to know who your real friends are, afterall you only get married once (hopefully) and if they dont want to share that special day with you then thats their hard luck isnt it. Go and enjoy your day you wont even notice them missing!

Its like me now i've had 2 car crashes 1 which was pretty bad and another on friday which wasn't too serious with both of them i've found out who my real friends are.

Steph xx

coolio_2

Stephb1986 wrote: »

Atleast this way you get to know who your real friends are,

I would NEVER expect real friends to come to my wedding over a funeral. The OP came across has having no synmpathy for those who have lost loved ones, and totally self centred. :rolleyes:

coolio_2

Timmne wrote: »

That kind of opinionated nonsense is totally unfair - I'd like to see you step from behind your computer to say that to the OP.

I see where the OP is coming from - it's not that people have selfishly died, it's that she's been let down at the last minute. It's not why you've been let down that's the problem, just that it happened at all, regardless of the reason.

Yeah yeah, full of sympathy

I am sorry if the deaths are true but it seems unlikely. Do people not realise that I have paid huge amounts of money per head

Stephb1986_2

coolio wrote: »

I would NEVER expect real friends to come to my wedding over a funeral. The OP came across has having no synmpathy for those who have lost loved ones, and totally self centred. :rolleyes:

But then again I wouldn't expect real friends just to send me a txt I would of expected a phone call atleast its really bad manners to send a txt saying sorry I can't make it to your special day when you've paid a fortune for me. After all a funeral isn't going to last all day and all night is it why can't they make it to the evenings events.

I'd be pretty cheesed off as you would be! so don't act all high and mighty like you wouldn't care if people did the same to you. :mad:


Steph xx

coolio_2

It may be a strange concept but a death can often be upsetting to people, as can a funeral. I know that the family funerals I have attended, there is no way I would be in any mood to go to reception afterwards. I just want to spend the time with the family.

And stop mentioning the money, it;s just making your argument even worse.

If someone cancelled due to a bereavement they would be in my thoughts often during the big day and I would send them a card right away.

december

Stephb1986 wrote: »

But then again I wouldn't expect real friends just to send me a txt I would of expected a phone call atleast its really bad manners to send a txt saying sorry I can't make it to your special day when you've paid a fortune for me. After all a funeral isn't going to last all day and all night is it why can't they make it to the evenings events.

I'd be pretty cheesed off as you would be! so don't act all high and mighty like you wouldn't care if people did the same to you. :mad:


First of all, I just reread your earlier post and hope that the car crash wasn't serious and that you recover soon. I'm not saying I wouldn't care, I would be disappointed but I would try to hide it from them so they didn't feel even worse. I would have no problem in a friend texting me to say they couldn't come, in fact I would rather know by text than not at all. You don't seem to grasp how upsetting it is losing a loved one and how someone's wedding, as strange as it may sound to you, would pale in comparison.

For me it's not about the money, money can be earned, a loved one can never be replaced. There is no way that I would expect a friend who is recently bereaved to attend my evening reception, they have to do whatever is best for them, not whatever is best for me. Maybe my expectations are just different.

December