dla advise needed ( UPDATE I WON MY APPEAL )

welshmaiden

hi i have been turned down twice for dla now and im due to have my appeal on 10th of october. the problem i have is that my gp didnt pay much attention when he wrote my report. he didnt look into my past. also i dont think he realises how much pain im in with my arthritis in the spine i have sciatitica and he didnt even put that on the report he wrote that i had arthritis depression asthma anxiety, hayfever and what meds i am on but he wrote nothing about how this affects me. i dont think he realises how bad things are for me.
i have been under an incredible amount of stress in the last four years first with the suicide of my cousin and the devastation that caused in my family and then after the break up of my marriage under cruel humiliateing circumstances which resulted in people shunning me in the street my house getting targeted by local youths my son having to leave home because he was beaten up several times. this was because my now ex husband was in trouble with the police for sending sex texts to a 14 year old girl. none of this my fault and main reason for my marriage break up.
it almost destroyed me and made me suicidal. then i met someone else and became pregnant after we had split up and my new partner wasnt very supportive although he is now.
after my son was forced to leave home (because he was being beaten up by local youths as a direct result of what my ex had done ) he moved into a hostel and ended up in prison and was expecting three to four years inside after being in the wrong place at the wrong time he only spent four months on remand because he was just with these four boys who commited a robbery whilst he was with them although he didnt participate.
my daughter 20 is liveing two hundred miles away with a violent man and i cant do anything to help her as she wont leave him even though she often phones up in tears one day by accident as she rang me useing her mobile in her pocket and i could hear him kicking off and slapping her and shouting at her. i couldnt get her any help as she refuses to give me address.in case i turn up and try to bring her home.
to add to all that my mum is terminally ill with heart problems and we just found out this week they are going to attempt a very risky heart bypass as its her only possible chance she is 72 and its very complicated.
. in the last three months i have lost two stone in weight gone from a healthy ten stone to a weak eight stone. because ive totally lost my appetite. the only joy in my life are my two boys aged 11 and 18 months. i cant eat i cant sleep and sometimes just wish i could go to sleep and never wake up. i have no energy and just take care of my childrens needs and totally neglect my own. ie hygiene etc

ive been to my doctors but he just doesnt listen trys to get the interview over as quickly as possible and obviously doesnt take any notice. he just looks bored and makes me feel like im wasteing his time. which makes it even harder to talk to him. how can i get him to sit up and take notice and realise how bad things are at the moment im that bad that i cant even leave the house alone now. all i want is the help that i need both finacially and medical. im worried that i wont be able to cope and go into complete meltdown soon. i dont know how much more i can deal with.
also after my marriage break up i had over three thousand pounds of debt to clear. as my ex hadnt been paying the bills and hasnt paid any since. these debts are now clear through my own doing. had to pay over two thousand out on a credit card my ex had been useing my card on internet to buy dvds then hideing the statements. five hundred in rent arrears and two hundred water and various other smaller debts.
im trying to support my mum and dad as best i can but im the only one. i have three brothers who arnt interested and a sister who only visits them once every couple of months for about an hour

Woodyrocks

Hi Welshmaiden,

Could you please edit your post to make it easier to read and to make it easy to give appropriate advice. A few paragraphs would really help break up the text.

p.s welcome to the fourm

[Deleted User]

welcome to mse and i`m sorry for the catalogue of problems that your life has become,remember its always darkest before the dawn.
As for the dla sounds to me as though your gp isnt fully aware of the issues that might affect your application,which btw can only be based on your care and or mobility needs,perhaps you could contact the surgery and make a double appointment so that he/she will hopefully listen more carefully,failing that i`d change my gp.
Good luck with the appeal,i assume youve opted for an oral hearing which gives the best chance of succes,if we can be or further help please post again.
x

welshmaiden

yes i have opted for an oral appeal also the welfare rights have now taken over the case. just dont know if i have the strengh left to fight much longer. feel so disheartened by the whole thing. what bugs me most is ive suffered with depression for over 18 years and never claimed a penny but when i do it just goes pear shaped. ive only written about what the actual problems are so i can give some background. what i need is some sound advise.

Oldernotwiser

Don't get too bogged down in all your social problems as they won't affect your application. Also (and please don't take this the wrong way) you'll get more help from your doctor if you remember that s/he's not a social worker and that you need to stick to the relevant things when you have an appointment. People tend to pour their hearts out on MSE, which is fine, but in real life you're better off sticking to the point.

welshmaiden

i do try not to dwell too much on my social problems when i speak to my doctor but he does make it really difficult to explain. i tell him roughly how im feeling but he just doesnt seem to take it in. partly what i think the problem is the area he covers there are a lot of drug addicts and conartists and think he has lost some of his compassion for people. what he doesnt realise is that some people have genuinely got problems and arnt just trying to con the system.
ive asked him for help many times but just isnt interested. but if he bothered to read into my medical records he would see that ive suffered with depression for many years before he became my doctor.
he hasnt even asked if there are problems with my family and depression. i have a brother who has bipolar disorder and psychosis and also recently my eldest son who was originally diagnosed as a child with severe adhd ,after leaving home got himself another doctor and it turns out that he too has bipolar disorder with psychosis.
my mother has also been suffering from depression most of her life.
about twelve years ago if my doctor looked then he would see that a psychiatrist diagnosed me with genetic reactive clinical depression this was after i had taken a serious overdose. this is what scares me the day i took the overdose i saw my previous doctor in the morning and then whent home and took the overdose. my old doctor was almost in trouble but i explained that it wasnt his fault because i played down just how badly i was feeling.
i cant go to another doctor in the practice because he is a one man band so im pretty much just stuck with him. also ive tried to tell him how much pain im in with my back and the pain i have running down the back of my leg. he hasnt even ordered any tests just makes me live with it. i

SuziQ

Hi welshmaiden,you really need to change your Gp!Even if you have to get on a bus and travel out of your immediate vacinity to do so. It doesn't sound as though he has anything left to give tbh and you need to find someone who is still interested in people.
Have you ever approached social services or asked for a psychiatric nurse? They have more time to spend individually and can also support medical appeals. Where I worked you could self refer,you could find out from a local clinic where they are based and what the referral process is.
What other benefits do you recieve or have you applied for?
Where I live now there is a Community Psychiatric support unit which is self refer-in fact one of my children has been seeing a psychiatric social worker there and it has really helped.
I understand fully,being a mother too,why yiu fret over your daughter but it sounds as if there is very little you can do until she asks for help.

You seem to be the person in the family who takes on everyone elses problems,and tbh you are not emotionally strong enough to do that and need to take care of yourself first for a while-if you crumble,who will care for your two youngest children?

tom9980

You have two options

Find another doctor even if that means travelling further i moved to another county but still go and see my family doctor 18 miles away simply because he knows me best and has been my doctor for all 27 years of my life. Technically this of course is difficult because you are supposed to re register with an new doctors when you move but surely someone knows if you can request another doctor if its a 1 man band?

Second have you told him about the history of mental llness in your family? point out all the things you have to us to him he probably doesnt realise how badly your suffering this is especially the case if you havent told him. Your right that he probably doesnt care as much now doing any job for a long time can wear anyone out especially dealing with the sick. If you are indeed stuck with him keep going and keep making appointments until you get answers dont take no as an answer lots of doctors fob patients off simply because they dont know whats going on. Has your back pain been diagnosed? have you had any xrays or other tests? any treatment at all? Insist that he address these concerns.

Oldernotwiser

Worth warning anybody who travels to see a GP that they're going to have difficulties when they need a home visit. Many GPs don't allow patients to live outside their area for this very reason.

welshmaiden

i really do want to change my doctor but i am worried that this may affect my dla claim and make it look like ive changed doctors to try and find a doctor who will support my claim.. but as soon as this is all over i do intend to do that there is actually a doctors surgery just 100 yards away from my house.
just a few months ago i took my eleven year old son to him as he wasnt well and i got told it was a virus my doctor didnt even examine him even though i asked him to check my sons throat as i suspected he had tonsilitis as he had a sore throat and i knew his father was proned to it. a week later i had to see the emergency out of hours gp as my son really wasnt well, it turned out that he had bad tonsilitis and needed strong antibiotics to clear it up.
i also remember now how my first husbands mother whent to see my doctor with chest problems and he sent her home with an inhalor. a few weeks later whilst she was visiting her daughter in america she was very unwell and was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer she died three weeks later.
my doctor was also almost struck off a couple of years ago for over prescribing patients and various other complaints had been made about him.
also a few months ago he gave me a prescription for voltarol. about three years ago i was in hospital and i had anaephylactic shock after takeing voltarol. luckily i was in the hospital at the time for another complaint ( i had an ovarian cyst )and the hospital had given it too me for pain relief. otherwise i could have died as the reaction was very severe and they almost had to perform a trachaeotomy. but the medication they had gievn me began to work just in time. i was very lucky because i actually had this medication at home and could have taken it when there was no medical help around as it was a medication that i was on at the time.. luckily when he gave me this prescription, i recognised its other name which he had written on the prescription and pointed out that it was the same medication that im allergic too. it is written all over my medical notes that i am allergic to it both at the local hospital and on my gps notes.
he has not ordered any xrays for my back although he did order blood tests which indicated that there was inflamation in my body. he just said that i have arthritis and that the pain down the back of my leg was sciatica and left it at that and when i asked him for an xray he just said there is no need as it was obvious that was the problem yet he nevert mentioned the sciatica on his dla report.
i did have an mri scan about seven years ago which showed that i had two herniated discs in my spine and degeneration of the other discs. however this was just done on my cervical spine. i injured my neck about ten years ago whilst doing judo which was a lifelong passion of mine from childhood. had done it since i was 8 years old. but unable to do it now. i was treated for this with accupunture treatments (which helped up untill the treatment course was over and for about four months after)at a top orphoepaedic hospital at gobowen in oswestry but they said it was inoperable.
this has been troublesome for me ever since the injury but then i whent to college about seven years ago to study holistic therapies and got several diplomas but they are no use to me now as im now unable to stand for long enough to perform a treatment and things are now much worse.
since my baby was born 18 months ago things have got progressively worse and i am in almost constant pain.i have pain in my lower back before that i was able to walk to my doctors which is about a mile away from my home now i cant because the pain gets too bad and i have to rely on taxis which costs me eight pounds for to travel there and back. which often i cant afford. i really connot walk very far but more than the 50 meters limit. to get mobility component of dla. but what i didnt mention on my form was that i can walk that distance but didnt realise that it meant how far i could walk before i was in severe pain to be honest i cant even walk to the end of my path before im in pan which is about twenty yards.
so what im working on is getting the personal care element and low rate mobilty. being unable to walk far is seriously causeing me problems though both physically and financially. if i got dla then at least i would be able to afford to buy a car which would improve my quality of life. as im a single mum with two dependant children and i would be able to visit my parents more often and be able to spend more precious time with them. as i do constantly worry about them as my mum is seriously ill and i feel helpless and my 75 year old dad is looking more and more old and frail because of the stress that they are under. not so long ago he looked fantastic and younger than his years.
i think it is true that my doctor doesnt have anything left to give as i know for a fact that he hasnt always been like this. because 18 years ago he was the one who helped me to go into a refuge and escape my violent first husband. he gave me the information i needed to get in touch with womens aid. i met him at the baby clinic where i used to attend with my eldest son who is 19 in november. he wasnt even my doctor at the time but he spotted the bruises on me and did what he could to help me. that was why when i moved back to this area seven years ago i chose him to be my doctor.
i am presently recieving income support, child benefit, child tax credit and the low rate of dla for my eleven year old son who has adhd. but even though my son has adhd to be honest he is an absolute godsend and helps me out no end with the baby and is a joy to be around. but i do feel very guilty sometimes and feel like i occasionally put on him too much. although he doesnt seam to mind especially when it comes to the baby.
does anyone know if the fact that i get a low rate of dla for my son if that would have any affect on my ability to get dla for myself. i even had to fight to get that. they changed the decision after the third reconcideration

SuziQ

Changing your GP will not make your new dla application look suspect though.You have a better GP closer-CHANGE ASAP! Apart from the DLA,you need to be seeing a good DR-that is far more important at this stage than your dla claim.Having a good GP and getting tests and treatment will do you far more good than any amount of money could!