ex and would be ex-gamblers support thread

williamD1964

50+ days clean and still counting. Money is tight this month, very tight. Keepng the faith and trying to stay clean. Small steps, one at a time. Hope everyone is ok.

cantcope

well done William. Dont be tempted this month if money is tight. will be a lot worse if you bet.
keep strong x

williamD1964

The funny thing is, it's like a feeling of resignation that has taken hold. I have not even wanted to go into a bookies or have go on the machines since I have realised how crap I am at them (long may it continue)! I think it's because I realise how close I was (and still am) to the edge. I think the real hard work will start when I am a little bit further down the road, and I have a little disposable income that I might become tempted to speculate with, or worse, things go tits up and I need money on the hurry up. Thanks all for words of encouragement

cantcope

William

Once you have accepted you have no control things might become easier. You can win but you are then compelled to carry on. we have a saying. can't stop when i'm winning and i can't stop when i'm losing. once you realise this you'll realise that you just can't win.

money on the hurry will not be gained from gambling and could result in you having less money than you started with. Things will be tough but you will come out the other side a much stronger person.

It took me tough times paying off my debts, moving back with parents, no social life etc... But 3 1/2 years on i'm debt free with my own mortgage again. Definitely worth the sweat and tears.

williamD1964

Thanks for the words guys, will keep them in mind. Am ebaying like mad at the moment to make a few quid just to get me through.

williamD1964

Well done mate, keep up the good work, we are rooting for you , and are here to support you.
Remember my first week, (not so long ago) so feel proud of your achievement.

cantcope

Well done!!! It's always tougher at the beginning and then again when you have no debt be it a year or ten years down the line. Kepp up the good work it will be so worth it xx

riquelme

william and insomnia - well done, keep it going dont worry that its only 1 day - 20 days, 2 years whatever truth is we are just as far away from our next bet as the next person - and thats today, get through the day by whatever means but just get through it. take another route, dont have any money on you, get rid of your cards, install gamblock, whatever it takes you need to think about doing it until the urges subside.

had the kids staying with me all weekend, still meeting up as a family to do stuff togther, finding it hard when the nippers arent around, i miss them so much it hurts. got them tuesday and wednesday and also friday nights this week so will be happy. still dont want to gamble and have no thoughst about it - so thats good but could be running into trouble financially as i go through my outgoings with CCCS who said that my creditors may not accept reduced payments and put a charge on my property where my OH is with kids. this would put a lot of stress and worry on us. i have some money to offer full and final payments but need to get them to accdept (its around 60% of what i owe but have offered around 30% so far)

so theres a bit of worry a lot of hurt at the moment that really is testing and tempting to gamble to get the money i need to pay it off, but i know that i wont win and if i did i would only end up spending it all, so its a bad idea

stay strong peeps

cantcope

Hi Riq,

It sounds like you are going through another stressful time. Keep strong. You know we are all here to support you. Hopefully it won't come to putting a charge on your property. When is your meeting with CCCS?

Make sure your new place is full of photos of the kids, maybe get them to do some drawings for you when you are together this week? If they feel like it's their home too with their belongings in it i'm sure they'll settle a bit quicker.
People that see their children less when the relationship breaks up says the time they do spend with them is quality time. Cling to this knowing that if you were still gambling you wouldnt be getting the same amount of time with them, at the family home or otherwise.

You are doing so well. give yourself a big pat on the back x

williamD1964

Hi Riq, I can't imagine what you are going through, missing your kids. Have two nippers myself and though I moan about them I could not bear to be without them. They, and their future are my reason I am trying to stay clean. Good luck one and all.