ex and would be ex-gamblers support thread

skint,single_mum_of_4

Last night was hard,my ex abusive monster was drunk and started sending abusive text messages to me,he was trying to get hold of my son but my son was out and he didn't believe me.i could hardly read the text but what i did make out made me feel sick,took me back to when i was with him.My son doesn't want his dad to have his mobile number so that's why he go's through me.
All i wanted to do was buy 10 cigs and go online play a few slots to take my mind off things...but i didn't and i'm so glad i cut that card up !

Free bingo all day today on Foxy bingo,i'm gonna hav't to keep really busy !
Its a rip off anyway because if you win you can't withdraw unless u deposit and then spend x amount.Glad i cut my prepaid credit card up,so can't deposit anyway.
I hate to say this but i'd usualy phone in sick if it was a free bingo day and the thing is there would be that many playin that i never won anyway so i would just end up depositing and going into one of the rooms that wasn't free..lol didn't win there either !
My plan today is to do all the washing,go to shops,have a walk in the sun(my garden doesn't see any sun at all) go to work ,come home and cook dinner then bath and chill tonight.

I want to go for a walk each day think this will also help get me fit ready for when i get my bike.

riquelme

well done SSM, youre doing great, keep it up. amother gone without gambling.
wake up tomorrow and have a plan and stick to it.

stay strong everyone

riquelme

bump, back to the top. hows everyone? hows the newcomers skint mum etc. keep the posts going everyone. remember even though we are in recovery someone could be looking for a bit of support and advice.

stay strong everyone, just for today i will not gamble

skint,single_mum_of_4

Hi
well the last two days i have let my self down and hit the online bingo :mad:
got a Ladbrokes near me so went in and deposited in there(as i cut my prepaid credit card up).ive not lost much but it was money i saved from not gambling and i wanted to buy a new window blind(sick of havin curtains shut because of the blinding son) and also i wanted to get my daughter a new quilt cover.I'm gutted i really am !
i did so well too..nearly 2 weeks !
Theres no excuse,i just did it !

Gonna start again tommorow
ive also started a diary on the diarys forum today because theres alot i need to deal with apart from the gambling and i think all my problems are interlinked

hope everyone else is ok

GeorgeUK

Hi Riq, good to see you again.
Still no gambling but getting bored and just plain fed up. Not motivated to do anything and just dozily plodding along. Can't even get excited about the family holiday to America (brother's being a ****), almost dreading it actually.

SSM, you need to work out why you felt the need to gamble. If you can identify the triggers and react to them before they kick in, then you will get a head start to beat it. Hope you can do it (and your diary doesn't read like mine).

Hope everyone else is okay - just say hi so we know you're still out there.

riquelme

ssm - have you thought about getting yourself banned from the bookies>? its easy, go in when it 1st opens so there isnt many people in, take a passport photo with you and ask to be self excluded.

skint,single_mum_of_4

GeorgeUK wrote: »

Hi Riq, good to see you again.
Still no gambling but getting bored and just plain fed up. Not motivated to do anything and just dozily plodding along. Can't even get excited about the family holiday to America (brother's being a ****), almost dreading it actually.

SSM, you need to work out why you felt the need to gamble. If you can identify the triggers and react to them before they kick in, then you will get a head start to beat it. Hope you can do it (and your diary doesn't read like mine).

Hope everyone else is okay - just say hi so we know you're still out there.

Hi George
your right i need to sort out what triggered this sudden need to gamble,i think this time it was because i'd had a good week with work etc.b4 i'd gamble as "my treat" also when i was stressed,fed up.lonley u name it !

what did u mean "my diary does'nt read like yours" ?

skint,single_mum_of_4

riquelme wrote: »

ssm - have you thought about getting yourself banned from the bookies>? its easy, go in when it 1st opens so there isnt many people in, take a passport photo with you and ask to be self excluded.

Hi
I'm gonna see how i go 1st
The bookies is about 20mins from me so not on my doorstep and to be honest it was the 1st time i'd been in there and felt embarressed goin in so i don't think i'll be doin that again in a hurry

riquelme

skint,single_mum_of_4 wrote: »

Hi
I'm gonna see how i go 1st
The bookies is about 20mins from me so not on my doorstep and to be honest it was the 1st time i'd been in there and felt embarressed goin in so i don't think i'll be doin that again in a hurry

ok, im going to be blunt with you just like people were honest with me. the above sounds like an excuse, its left a door open. you've done well to get rid of the cards. if you are serious about beating this you need to close a few more doors. whilst it is open the temptation and means are always there. you may not get rid of the temkptation for a while, but believe me it does get easier but what you can do is get rid of the means to doing it.
1. getting rid of cards
2. install gamblock
3. self exclusion from bookies
4. close internet accounts


these can be done with minimal fuss and effort

i dont want to preach, just offering some hopefully helpful words. doing those things above helped me (as well as going to GA). keep posting on here, when youre feeling good and when you're struggling, we're al;ways here to help.

GeorgeUK

Hi SSM

what did u mean "my diary does'nt read like yours" ?

Right now, you haven't lost alot of money (see my signature below).
I lost money and tried to stop
Had a slight wobble, but thought that was okay as i was doing really well.
Fell totally off the wagon as i started to panic and just throw money away.

I left one account open, even though i had banned myself from the casino section. I managed to lose about £9.5k after i thought i had dealt with the problem. Like Riq says, i had left a door open.

Just hoping you can learn from out mistakes at the wobble stage and not fall completely. Getting rid of the card was a great start, but it was only the start. Dealing with an addiction takes time and you really need to keep your wits about you. It's quite easy to fall back into old routines once you feel safe and confident again. Don't let your defences down.