Miscarriage - what to expect?

squashy

I am so sorry for you. It is such a sad thing to happen.

I also experienced a missed miscarriage after previously having a normal miscarriage, which happened at 6 weeks and was just like a heavy period and I just "got on with it" really. However this time round it was much worse. I had gone for my normal scan at 13 weeks and they told me the baby had died at 9.5 weeks. We were very shocked and although we were given a choice of management (medical, D&C or self-managed), unfortunately we were not given much information about what to expect, and all I could think was that I wanted to go home and see my kids so I chose to let nature take it's course.

I really thought I could just get on with it, I went back to work the next day etc and tried to blot it out. However a few days later I began to really haemmorage and ended up in A&E. A&E was not a nice place to be having a MC as at one point i was stuck in a dirty toilet on my own with an IV bag in my hand, struggling to cope with large pieces of matter that i was passing, pieces of the placenta i imagine. I am sure the emergency alarms in there were just for decoration!

I ended up being admitted then having a D&C anyway.

I know everyone is different and I hope you don't mind me being so frank, but I really wish I had known in advance what to expect by choosiing to manage my own MC. I think in hindsight I should have chosen to go in as a day case and have tablets to help me pass my baby in a safe, clean environment with the right support.

Lots of luck xxxx

ailuro2

I hadn't even heard of missed miscarriages until I had one. I /we chose the tablet and day stay in the hospital, but the night before I went in the miscariage happened at home, but I still had to go in anyway and do the rest. No one tells you what to do with the stuff that comes away.

The Doctor asked me about need for contraception while I was in a side room for the consulation on D&C or tablets, sadly she had just assumed I was in for a termination, hope it doesn't happen too oftein, but I thought to warn you that in some cases the women are in the same area, as happened to me.

It's heartbreaking to go through, and comes as such a shock - I had only gone in for a check up because of very slight spotting, only pushed it because it would mean an early scan and we'd see the baby early.

Take care,

Ailuro

shelly

So sorry OP you are going through this right now.

Reading through the posts we all experience things differently.
My first missed mc was in 2004. I started spotting dirty brown discharge at 6 weeks but Doctor told me not to worry because I was in no pain at all. At 3 months we went for a scan to be told the baby had died at 6 weeks.
I chose to take the tablets that bring on a mc.
I went home that night and went back either 24 or 48 hours later, can't quite remember. Took another tablet and waited for it to work.
It was awful, the tablets bought on contractions to empty my womb but after 24 hours I hadn't passed the empty sac.
I had to have a d&c the following day and on my life I swear I wish I had had it in the first place.

Second mc was 2006. Same as before, started spotting dirty stuff at 6 weeks but this time doctor told me to go straight to A&E. Scan showed just an empty sac. That time I chose to wait another week just to make sure.
Went back a week later and nothing had changed so I opted for the D&C straightaway.

Personally I had absolutely no pain at all with either of my mc's (well not pain in my womb, my heart was a different matter) and only spotting of dirty brown, old blood.
A friend of mine lost a pg at the same stage, 6 weeks. She lost alot of blood and was in agony.


DO NOT be afraid to ask questions. If you want to know what they are doing and why just ask. If you aren't satisfied with the answer, ask someone else.
Though I found the nurses who looked after me to be excellent.


Best wishes OP, and indeed to everyone else who has gone through this.

shelly

I also meant to say that aswell as breaking my heart for a second time my second mc saved my life.

During the D&C some cervical cells came away with whatever was left in my womb. As I had consented for them to test whatever came out to see if they could find out why I had lost the pg they looked at it all under a microscope.
In doing so they found some abnormal cells.
The short story is I had a very aggressive type of cervical cancer deep inside my cervix and if the pg had gone to term I would have died shortly after having the baby.
I have now had most of my cervix removed and all is well.

They (whoever they are ) say that everything happens for a reason and this just proved it for me.

galvanizersbaby

Thanks everyone for your support and kind words.x
I'm booked in for an ERPC tomorrow morning as I did with my first miscarriage so not taking any chances with letting it happen naturally.

slscarborough

will be thinking of you x x x

nadnad

oh my heart goes out to you. the same happened to me last may, i had a bit of bledding at 12 weeks and went to hospital they scanned me next day and baby stopped growing at 6 or 7 weeks. i was going to let things happen naturally and actually thought i had miscarried becasue i bled so much and passed enormous clots, when i went back they said i hadnt miscarried yet and the bleeding and clots was my womb trying to get rid.

i booked in for a d&c and they gave me the anaesthetic but before they even did anything to me i apparently miscarried naturally. it was a tough time and i feel for you, my thoughts are very much with you.

nearlyrich

I haven't been through it myself but I will be thinking of you tomorrow hope it all goes as well as it can and that you recover quickly.

larmy16

I had a miscarriage at about 12 weeks. It was an unplanned pregnancy, but what I was not prepared for was the revulsion I felt about the child I was carrying - it was inexplicable even to myself. All I could think was that there was something poisonous and alien in me. It really was the most awful thing as part of me dearly wanted a second child.

Perhaps it was instinct and a knowledge that I had a dead being inside me, but I kept thinking get out of my body, get out!!! Then I would think, this is my child, why do I feel this way? Horrible horrible. Have not thought of this for years.

Well I started bleeding and went for a scan. No longer pregnant. I passed a tiny little blob which looked like a foetus but with no limbs. I was upset and distressed but I will never forget the feeling of having to get that thing out of my body. It was very painful for me too, on all fours, bearing down and contracting.

Sorry for such a grim story. I do hope you will be ok. Incidentally I went on to have another pregnancy, this time ectopic. Yet again I knew something was wrong, but did not have the intense revulsion. In fact I nearly died from the experience.

I only have one child and he is such a blessing to me. Good luck to you.

heart_free

My heart goes out to you and anyone who experiences miscarriage.

Just because I can't see it posted here............the miscarriage association are a great means of support to women who have had, or are in danger of having a miscarriage. I worked doing volunteer telephone support with them a few years ago, after using the service muyself during my second MC. They cannot give specific medical advice, but are grwat for both support and information.

Hope things get better for you soon x