Please define what "Child Maintenance" Covers

Mark666666

DonedoingDebt - Thanks for your reply. Just read it now. I think I will go to the first solo FREE meeting if only to ask them exactly what my LEGAL obligations are considering my child is an adult and no longer under the jurasdiction of the CSA. And more importantly how much, assuming I do legally have to pay. This takes any pleasure out of supporting my son when I may be FORCED to help, compared to voluntarily WANTNG to help. I only wish my son had the decency to contact me so we could discuss this mess, something which I recently asked him in a letter, which was also duly ignored. If he only knew how much upset he has caused me! He should be ashamed.

Incidentally my divorce was handled by a judge and guess what - I ended up paying MORE than the CSA would have asked me to pay! Needless to say when I asked for the CSA to get involved several years ago I was told by the vile ex's solicitor that the CSA had NO jurasdiction as a judge presided over it. Funny how the CSA got the bum's rush when she knew I would have had a reduction in my monthly payments if they got involved! I wouldn't mind but for the last three years, when my daughter started working, I paid £170 per month for my son, (which I based on CSA guidelines) when in actual fact my divorce agreement was to pay £150 for EACH child. So in simple terms I have knowingly OVERPAID the ex £780 in total, for the last 3 years - just to keep the peace so to speak. Still get sha@t on though! More fool me eh? No fool like an old fool as the saying goes!

Dancing_Shoes

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

And quite right so...why should a mortgage get taken into account? If it did then there would be many a man shackling a huge mortgage round his neck so that less CSA would be paid.

I am on CSA1 and my ex took a huge home improvement loan out 3 years after my daughter was born but that gets taken into account - think that's fair??

The new system - CMEC - will be 12% of a gross amount. This is probably because things like you suggest - whacking a great load into a pension - have been getting done.

I have it from a very good source that at present cmec will still be allowing 100% of pension contributions although this will always be subject to change up until the new csa 3. I personally think they should allow pension contributions otherwise the country will be in a far worse situation but I think they should only allow x as a percentage of your monthly salary as a maximum contribution that they will take off iyswim.

Diverting a huge amount into a pension to avoid a large sum seems a bit extreme:rolleyes:

Mark666666

I would love it if there is anyone out there who has been threatened with court action in the same way as me, who could shed some light on the situation.

Frugallass - I really do hope the solicitors letter has no real standing too. My brother in law thinks, after reading ALL of the Childrens Act, that it sounds like it is more to do with an adult child who is practically destitute or in dire need of financial help, not someone still living at home. I believe that even if the vile ex only let him continue living at home, and he got a part time job (as his girlfriend and other friends at Uni have all got) PLUS the money I give hime - that he would survive reasonably well. Just thought of something else too. The yearly expenses list for Uni includes Internet usage £240!
They already have internet - something which I DON'T EVEN HAVE MYSELF. So taken to it's final conclusion am I to pay £120 towards the vile ex's internet! It's just a pi@s take. These are costs you MAY expect a student living away from home to encounter but not when living at home, surely. Or am I on a different planet?

frugallass

Mark666666 wrote: »

Just thought of something else too. The yearly expenses list for Uni includes Internet usage £240!
They already have internet - something which I DON'T EVEN HAVE MYSELF. So taken to it's final conclusion am I to pay £120 towards the vile ex's internet! It's just a pi@s take. These are costs you MAY expect a student living away from home to encounter but not when living at home, surely. Or am I on a different planet?

I know they do charge for internet within the Uni accommodation and I know it's not cheap but £240 does seem a bit extreme, especially if he is living at home, it's not really a necessity like food or books is it? The more I think about your situation the more obvious it is that your ex is just trying to screw as much money out of you as she possibly can before the money stops rolling in.

Out of interest, which Uni is your son going to?

Dancing_Shoes

You really need to sit down and talk this through with a solicitor. I think that you will look very bad in a judges eyes if you are ignoring solicitors letters and it will also appear as if you have something to hide to you ex and her solicitor (although I realise technically it is your sons solicitor).
I would work though your income and expenditure and write it down, then run through with a solicitor and maybe make a few changes;) and then go forward with your offer (if you want to make one). They would have to have a very strong case (ie that you had lots of free income) and it not only costs money but if you are already offering an amount the judge will look at this very poorly as it will be shown for what it is...GREED!

Don't ignore the letters, there is a case for taking an nrp to court for uni costs but your son living at home has a very weak case imho.

frugallass

Well I'm now dreading the day that we get a solicitor's letter threatening legal action if we don't pay towards his daughter's wedding costs - where does it end for god's sake?

Uni is a choice, in my opinion, and therefore the PWC and 'child' should fund this themselves, and any contributions made by the NRP should be classed as a 'bonus' and not a necessity/requirement.

It's about time someone gave the NRP's a break !

Donedoingdebt

Dancing_Shoes wrote: »

You really need to sit down and talk this through with a solicitor. I think that you will look very bad in a judges eyes if you are ignoring solicitors letters and it will also appear as if you have something to hide to you ex and her solicitor (although I realise technically it is your sons solicitor).

Sorry Dancing Shoes, I can't agree with this. The OP has already stated that he has set up a standing order to his son & that he's also prepared to pay over & above this for various items. In my opinion, this would impress a Judge far more than just wasting time & money, especially if money is already short, speaking to lawyers.

Solicitors are not a law unto themselves, they are just a person's legal representative with no extra powers in family courts. It is any individual's right to either reply to or ignore these letters, which have no more authority than direct correspondence from the PWC.

Obviously, any letters from court cannot be ignored, but if the NRP is doing all that can be reasonably expected of them, then he should have nothing to worry about, including expensive solicitors bills!

LizzieS_2

There are numerous depending factors for what a court will take into account. Apart from the list in the Children's Act, the manner in which the child was expected to be educated when both parents were together (if applicable), the ability of child to put sufficient time into study without grades falling due to trying to work too (depends on level of intelligence). From a nrp perspective, offers of help are taken into account, but it depends how realistic that offer is in the courts opinion (eg if you have paid £200pm in child support then offer just £20pm, it could go against you).

plimsoll

mitchaa wrote: »

If that is true, there will be an even higher number of fathers fleeing for the hills or going S.E as this will amount to higher monthly deductions.

12% gross is more than 15% net.

that maybe depends on the exact income as Income Tax & NI payments kick in at different levels but someone on a single mums forum I use checked it out for her ex's income & it came out as exactly the same.

lynzpower

Mark666666 wrote: »

Strange, because I am going through a similar thing except I have been threatened with court action regarding financial help towards my son's costs. Almost certainly brought about by a vile ex wife. She had no joy via a solicitors letter so must have pressured my SON to get a solicitor to basically threaten me with court action via this 'Children's Act?' which I'd never even heard of until recently? Incidentally I have NEVER had a cross word with my son and until 5 weeks ago was in regular contact. Such is the power of a bullying, vile ex wife, who has now effectively caused a split in a previously perfectly father-son relationship! I hope she is proud.

I must add I more than fulfilled my financial obligation to BOTH my children and have recently set up a standing order to pay my son money once a month, which he said he was grateful for. I also further intended to help him out by buying him clothes, maybe books etc but have been unable to even discuss this issue properly as he refuses to answer all texts and phone calls! I presume he has been advised by his mother/faceless solicitor to do so as the vile ex obviously wants more? already lost my 3 bedroomed house to her etc etc and live in a 1 bedroom flat. The only consolation is some other poor Bast@rd has to wake up next to her every morning these days!

Anyway I received another letter from 'Mediation Works' (on behalf of my sons solicitor (great this isn't it!) suggesting we discuss his financial arrangements through them, quote "as it's cheaper and less stressful than going to court"! Hence I will go for my FREE wow - first session to see if it's suitable to go through this organisation, then it's £105 per session thereafter. So I will be paying £105 for however many 'sessions' to tell my son something that would take me 5 minutes flat. Even then if the ex doesn't agree I believe they can still go to court. Who says the NRP doesn't get ripped off and sh*t on - even by his own kids, when I have never done a thing wrong?

http://www.opsi.gov.uk/acts/acts1989/ukpga_19890041_en_1

this is the childrens act. I used it dailyt for 5 years when I worked in a childrens social work department for a local authority.

How old is your son at university? I dont think hes a child so the aucpices of the act wont apply? I take it hes over 18.

Hes not a child at risk of abuse and in need of protection, hes not in foster care and hes not subject to any child support social work, so im really not sure what the "childrens act" they talk of can mean.Hes not even moving out of home so hes hardly a homeless young person at risk etc.

I suggest they are leading you a dance with this- let us know how you go on.