Bereft and Broken

EssexHebridean · 6 October 2016 at 2:34PM

I'm not sure you can - just had a look back on my own diary and can't see any option to do it. What I would say though, is if you feel as though you've moved on from where you started with this one, (which it sounds to me as though you have) why not have a clean start and a fresh diary? You can put a link to the new one as the final post in the old one, and a link to the old one in the first post of the new one...if you follow! :rotfl:

Thistle-down · 6 October 2016 at 2:52PM

I can relate to all the ebay !!!! - I think once I sell what I already have here in the house, I'll go to charity shops and pick up clothes that I think will sell well on ebay. It would be nice to just put something in a plastic bag, I hate all the trying to find the right box - not too heavy but still sturdy, using tons of bubble wrap, etc etc etc. and then find out I charged £3 too little for postage...

I'm no mechanic but whenever we've had things done to our exhaust, it's never been a huge expense, usually just a matter of taking off the old and putting on new. Hopefully yours will be the same.

Maybe one of the mods can change the thread title for you if you sent them a message? It sounds like a good idea to me and being positive has been on my mind all morning. (see my latest diary post!)

Otherwise I think starting a new thread on the diary page would be in order. I think I'd even leave off the first two B words, and just keep Building myself up!

Will you work full or part time when you go back? You may have already said, but if so I have forgotten

I hope you enjoy seeing your mum

Smolly · 6 October 2016 at 4:43PM

Thank you Essex and Thistle, wise words as ever xx

I have decided I will start a brand new diary, correctly placed in the diary section once I'm a little straighter in my head and hopefully back at work. I did start one there when I started this one but I would love to start afresh. At the moment I don't feel able to reduce my debt at all so I'll need a plan for when I do start a new diary.

I only work part time anyway Thistle so will just go back to my usual hours. I want to stay working within a school environment as its so handy for DS but I do plan to look for extra hours. That was my initial plan at the start of the summer but then everything changed and life got in the way!

Anyway I'm not off to mum's now. There's been a bad accident and one of the motorways I use is completely closed on both sides. I don't think I could take the stress of waiting in traffic so I've told her I'm not going.... Nothing I can do about it and I refuse to worry about not being able to go. I'm going to try and clear the kitchen table instead, list at least another couple of items on eBay and try and think of some other mad money-making schemes!

xx

EssexHebridean · 6 October 2016 at 8:00PM

We used to have a phrase we used a lot on here - "Baby Steps" - in the first instance target controlling your debt, not allowing it to get any worse. That will get your head into the mindset of knowing where your money is going, what needs to go where,and you'll learn to instinctively know at any stage in a month where your finances are at. While you're doing that, you can start to target an area at a time where you can make savings without trying to hit it all at once. Each time you make a saving, set the money aside and either pop it into your emergency fund or pay it off your chosen debt to target. Before you know it you WILL be tackling your debt, without the associated pressure that can go alongside it.

You can do this - you've done the hardest bit already, acknowledging you need help. You've got your cheer squad now - you can do anything! :T

Thistle-down · 7 October 2016 at 9:43AM

That's too bad about not seeing your mum, I hope whoever was involved in the accident is okay.

I think you should start your new diary even without a debt plan, getting yourself into a positive frame of mind with a fresh blank page will start things rolling. :j

I hope you have a good day xx

ERICS_MUM · 7 October 2016 at 12:47PM

Smolly, making the decision not to see your Mum for practical reasons without apparently stressing over it (on here anyway) is a tremendous step forward. Xx

EssexHebridean · 7 October 2016 at 12:59PM

ERICS_MUM wrote: »

Smolly, making the decision not to see your Mum for practical reasons without apparently stressing over it (on here anyway) is a tremendous step forward. Xx

She's right, you know - well done! :T

ERICS_MUM · 7 October 2016 at 1:10PM

EssexHebridean wrote: »

She's right, you know - well done! :T

Thanks for that, I worry that my comments might seem patronising. It's funny how we see Smolly's progress more than she herself does. That's the beauty of threads like this, strangers see things without the emotion.

Have a happy weekend all. I'm planning to start tidying the garden for winter. It's been so dry here that all my summer flowering stuff died long ago ! I never bother with daffs and tulips, I'm a fair-weather gardener !

EM xx

EssexHebridean · 7 October 2016 at 2:12PM

That's why these forums work - the mix of those new to it, and those who've been about for a while and speak from experience, mixed with an impartiality and the ability to speak quite frankly thanks to the anonymity. Because people are removed from the OP's situation (not specifically Smolly, but generally) they can see things in a much more level headed, rational way than if it were them in that position, I guess.

Smolly · 7 October 2016 at 4:43PM

Aaawww thank you guys - you lot really are the best xx You make me feel so much better and EM - I would never consider your comments to be patronising. You lot are my 'cheer squad'! Thanks EH - that really made me smile. Thistle - it's my birthday next week so I am going to start my new diary then - a new chapter in my life and all that malarkey! And I will leave any negative comments out of the title too!

OK - so today so far.... got back from taking DS to school. Got to the end of my drive and stopped short. Pulse starting racing, probably went quite white, couldn't move at all. The words, or something quite similar - Oh dear, someone appears to have stolen my flippin' car' went through my head. It was a little more poetic than that but you get my drift. I just didn't know what to do - the drive was empty. I thought what can I do? Then I decided what I must do....I must walk back to flaming school and pick up the damn car where I'd left it!!! God what a fruit I am!:rotfl:

So last night I had a really lovely evening. It wasn't stressful at all - no horrible motorway driving and although I didn't get anything new listed on 3Bay I did make about £14 so was chuffed with myself. Today - thought I would rest up and just relax. I caught up with a couple of programmes on TV I really enjoy and took myself off into town for a cautious look round. I knew where I was heading. I love scouring charity shops. Once I had to leave a job where I was having a few problems. OH asked me what I wanted to do instead as I had to do something to bring some money in. I told him I really wanted to sell second-hand clothes on 3Bay so that's what I did for a few months. Scouring for the bargains was the best bit and although I don't do it so often now as I have quite a lot of my own stuff still to sell, I do love a good bargain hunt.

Anyway today I thought that if I saw anything where a profit could be made I would take the opportunity. I used the virtual £14 I made last night, stretched it into £15 and ended up buying....
6 dresses (two of which are lower end designer labels)
5 pairs of shoes (3 of which are brand new)
1 pair of children's roller skates (brand new in box)
1 doll (old style, but still with some tags on).

I know which charity shops to check out as a lot in our area sell stuff for just £1 and some really brilliant bargains can be had. Everything I bought today, apart from two pairs of new shoes were all a £1 each, and I'm sure I can realise a profit on everything, or at least get my money back plus some.
So I felt like I was having a good day. I will spend a little time over the next week specifically trying to get these bits on.

As I was feeling pretty good in myself and not at all anxious I even opted for a mini beauty treatment in a chemist. I can't remember the last time I did something like this. Anyone ever had their eyebrows threaded? Well be warned if you haven't - it hurts! But in a nice kind of way...:eek:

So - got home, feeling content and relaxed and picked up the phone to mother. Had what I thought was a 'normal' chat, but as the conversation progressed she seemed to be getting a little more uptight. Concluded by telling me she'd rung the gas company to give them 'what for' (didn't say why) and that she was in a bad mood and that it was my fault. Forced laughter on her part. Told her quite crossly that I had no control over road traffic accidents and blocked roads and that it wasn't my fault at all. Forced laughter again and ended call! Does anyone want to adopt my mother???:D

Anyway am not going to stew over it, and am going to try and make some money on t'interweb this evening. I'd crack open a bottle of wine if I knew I wouldn't keel over after one glass so it'll have to be something fruity instead.

Once again - thank you Thistle, EH, EM and anyone else who has left supportive comments for being there in the background for me. I really do appreciate it xx

Bereft and Broken

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