Should my housemate pay for the dress she borrowed then ruined?

Former_MSE_Rebecca · 7 April 2015 at 12:40PM

One of my housemates borrowed a dress of mine for a wedding and then shrunk it in the wash. It's not brand new but it was expensive when I bought it and it's now unwearable. Should I ask her to give me the cash for it and risk having an awkward living situation? Or let it go as it was an accident and the dress was a few years old anyway?

tea_lover · 7 April 2015 at 1:40PM

Let it go. Although you could let her cook you a nice meal or take you out for a drink or something

Accidents happen, friends are far more important.

System · 7 April 2015 at 1:40PM

If she was a good friend she'd offer but if she didnt i wouldnt ask.

Georgiegirl256 · 7 April 2015 at 1:49PM

If she was a decent enough friend, you wouldn't have to ask, she'd automatically offer.

I was brought up to respect other people's items, and if someone had been good enough to lend me an item then I'd make sure I took good care of it. If I did happen to have an accident with it then I'd offer straight away to pay. I'm always surprised when people don't. Surely it's only good manners to.

I think her reaction would determine what I'd do next. If she was extremely sorry then I'd just let it drop, as accidents happen. If she couldn't care less, then damn right she'd be paying for it.

All depends on how attached you are to the dress I suppose, and how good a friend she is.

tea_lover · 7 April 2015 at 1:57PM

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

If she was a decent enough friend, you wouldn't have to ask, she'd automatically offer.

I was brought up to respect other people's items, and if someone had been good enough to lend me an item then I'd make sure I took good care of it. If I did happen to have an accident with it then I'd offer straight away to pay. I'm always surprised when people don't. Surely it's only good manners to.

I think her reaction would determine what I'd do next. If she was extremely sorry then I'd just let it drop, as accidents happen. If she couldn't care less, then damn right she'd be paying for it.

All depends on how attached you are to the dress I suppose, and how good a friend she is.

This is very true. I'd assumed that the friend would have offered to pay for the damage as, like you, that's how I was brought up.

If they hadn't even offered I think I'd be a bit more inclined to ask!

Although I guess it's still not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things.

pinkshoes · 7 April 2015 at 2:24PM

If they were a decent friend they would offer to pay...

You could then suggest finding a similar one second hand on eBay and she could pay for that, as it was a few years old...

purpleshoes_2 · 7 April 2015 at 2:57PM

I wouldnt ask for the value of the dress if it was a few years old and well worn. A sorry and a bottle of wine or a meal out even if it was cheap would be enough for me.

thorsoak · 7 April 2015 at 3:06PM

If she hasn't offered recompense but was a good friend (until now) then I don't think I would ask - but I certainly would not lend anything else!

skintpaul · 7 April 2015 at 3:09PM

Let it go, until the sales!

KARO · 7 April 2015 at 4:01PM

If it was dry-clean only, and the label clearly stated that, then she was taking a risk putting it in the washing-machine and she should offer to pay you for it.

Jagraf · 7 April 2015 at 4:15PM

I would never ask. However, if friend didn't offer,she wouldn't be a friend for long

If she did offer, it would hopefully go something like

"Omg I'm so sorry I ruined your dress"
"Don't worry it happens"
"I will get you a new one"
"Don't you dare, let's go out and you can buy the drinks"

Should my housemate pay for the dress she borrowed then ruined?

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