I Just Cant Take Any More

lynzpower · 27 July 2006 at 4:46PM

i just feel the need to moan really badly,and ive been looking at holidays on the internetwith a view to just running away

honestly? Can my life get any worse?

1)OH left his job on friday ( temping) due to being quite badly bullied and he was going to lamp someone so walked before he did - a good thing yes, but no work really coming through this week despite best efforts

2) Im on half pay and have a grand total of 100 in my bank until the 20th

3) We yesterday found out that his dad has a very serious disease

4) I found out today that Ive had an abnormal smear and that its pre-cancerous - have to have this investigated and cant get hold of my GP ( called helplines etc, theyve made me more worried)

OHs frustrated and pi55ed off., Im frustrated and pi55ed off. Its so hot the sweat is rolling off my face. Darent go anywhere, yesterday we went to walk to tescos and I nearly collapsed again and OH had to carry me home

I cant focus on anything ( still have to do this stupid court allocation questionaire, jsut cant sit still and think enough to manage it) Ive tried reading, the telly bores me, I cant concentrate, im just dwelling.

Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Broken_hearted · 27 July 2006 at 4:49PM

Hugs honey. I'd kill for a holiday right now too. Things are going badly here too but I won't bore you with details. I hope your OHs dad is ok and your OH finds a better job soon.

dancingfairy · 27 July 2006 at 4:53PM

Hey. I'm sorry you're feeling so miserable. From what I can tell you've been doing really well and have been a great supporter. Remind yourself of all the positive things that you have achieved towards reducing your debt.

Big Hugs. Sit tight and wait for it all to sort it out. You are doing your best in what are obviously very bad circumstances - anyone would be stressed out with it all. Eventually it will all be reseloved. Stay as positive as you can. If you are really fed up perhaps you could call the samaritans and have a good old whinge at them - I'm sure they would listen symathetically.

As for the cancer thing - you just have to wait I'm afraid - try not to worry 'till you know the full facts if you can.

Hugs.

PS please PM me if there's anything I can do. I'm sure all the other DFW's would say the same and will be here to help you as best they can soon.

Pobby · 27 July 2006 at 4:53PM

Lynz---so sorry that things are so c--ppy for you right now.Wish there was more I could say to you.You are always being so helpful to everyone on the board.Sending you hugs and well wishes.Wish I could do more.

Iriahm · 27 July 2006 at 4:54PM

hey, mum is a nurse in the well-woman clinic and she has said that you should not worry (harder said than done) and don't scare yourself. You haven't got confirmation of anything yet and its possible its just something they want to check again and will turn out to be nothing.

don't stress! at least you are not on your own and i'm sure your OH will have another job very soon.
Ixx

Macduff_3 · 27 July 2006 at 4:55PM

***hugs***

livinginhope · 27 July 2006 at 4:56PM

Hi Lynz,sorry to hear things are so bad,can't offer any advice

,but sending huge:grouphug: to try and make you feel a little better.Try and get a good nights sleep tonight and hopefully things might look a bit better tomorrow.:A

snoozer · 27 July 2006 at 4:58PM

:grouphug: Lynzpower

First of all -try not to worry too much about the abnormal smear, lots of women have them and they can be caused by all sorts of things and even if it is pre-cancerous the emphasis is on the pre, it will be treated and that will be that, you will have to have more frequent smears in the future but that will be a reassurance I'm sure.

As to your health, I may be wrong but are you trying to fight against your illness, thinking that you cn force your body to work. Believe me I've been there and the only result is meltdown. Try to give in to it, you will feel like a wimp and maybe other people will think that you are but if you feel the need to stay in bed for a week stay in bed for a week - it will help in the long run and i sounds as if your OH is supportive which is essential.

Unfortunately if your illness is like mine (still undiagnosed after 12 years I'm afraid) stress only makes things worse and the things that are going on financially in your life aren't helping. I'll keep my fingers crossed that OH gets a good welll paying job quickly to alleviate some of that.

Sue

Imelda · 27 July 2006 at 5:06PM

awww hugs Lynz,

So sorry to hear things are going badly for you.

Please don't worry about the smear I get that every time I go and have to have check ups all the time (not pleasant!)

Let me know if there's anything I can do....

Careful_girl · 27 July 2006 at 5:06PM

Hey Lynz, you are really going through it. The smear stuff is scary but the treatment nowadays is really good. My friend had it last year. The whole point is to catch it early so they have the best chance of helping you.
You know you can let it out here. You are so helpful to others and an inspiration to us all. One step at a time. Drink loads of icy water and make sure you eat and rest.
Sorry to hear about OH's dad. Sometimes it does all come together.
Big hugs from me and lots of positive thoughts.
Take care,
CG.:j

wannabedebtfree_2 · 27 July 2006 at 5:12PM

I work in a school, and we get 6 weeks off, so on the last few days of term everyone was asking what I would be doing, they were telling me about all these fab holidays they had booked, I get to go to the midlands for a week (to see my dad which is lovely, but hardly the bahamas........I'd visit him more often if he lived there!!)

I know how you feel, sometimes life smacks us in the head with lots of things at once, but once all of this is sorted it will get better.

Take it one step at a time

1) Your OH will get another job, its probably best he left, if he was close to decking someone, he'd hardly get a good reference from them!

2) £100 till the 20th, thats hard, but I'm assuming you've paid your bills, and thats to live off, since coming on here I've learnt that people can get by on next to nothing, you've been around on this board for a long time, so you probably know better than I do about this, but I'm sure you can manage!

3) Theres not much I can say about this one, but all you can do is think positive, be there for him, and your bf, I have a step-gran who has recently been diagnosed with colon cancer, and they have said there is no cure, she having chemo and radio to prolong it, but she will not be cured. I want to go and visit her (she lives with my dad) but at the same time I'm really scared, I've had her in my life for 25 of my 30 years, and she's always been great, so it will break my heart to see her ill......

4) If they are pre-cancerous that is a positive (may not feel like it) at least they are not cancerous. They will do a small procedure (know 4 people who have had similar results, and they had different procedures) a friend who had the final stage of pre-cancerous (literally very nearly cancerous) had something called a cone-biopsy (I think) where they cut away a small section of her cervix and she is fine now, just has to have regular smears for the next couple of years. Another had laser treatment, where they just zapped the cells, and she was in and out of hospital in a day. I know its scarey, and I have never faced it myself, but to have caught it early can only be a positive.

Finally, when your OH gets another job, put back as much as possible, and sort yourself out a last minute deal (I'll get my knuckles rapped for saying this by the hard-core savers - and I apologise if this is the wrong advice) a friend went to Turkey for a week for £89 each, and they spent about £150 when they were out there on excursions, food, a tattoo!! Everybody needs a break, just don't spend the money on credit, actually save, put all your loose change in a pot, it will soon add up. OR......if you have worked out when your debt free date is, work out how long it will take you to save for the trip of a lifetime, start planning your journey now, which means you get to surf the net trying to find fab places to visit, and get a map of the world on the wall with a big sign above it saying "ROUND THE WORLD TRIP 2009" or whatever, and have that to aim for.

On many occassions I've wanted to get into the car and just drive away, but I have my kids, and I couldn't do that to them, but I know how low people can get sometimes, its a dark place to be, and you need some light at the end of the tunnel.

xxxxx

I Just Cant Take Any More

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