I have not paid my credit cards since November

rainbowbrite_2 · 23 February 2008 at 6:29PM

We have been together for 16 years.I have always worked and even had 3 part time jobs while he finished his degree.He has been working now for 7 years and I stopped work 6 years ago now.After I had the baby I did nothing for over 6 months than I went to college for 3 years and had quite a generous student bursary as well as the student loan during that time.
I have only actually not had my owm income then,via whatever source, for 2 years.This is when he started to get a bit unreasonable,in my eyes at least.

rainbowbrite_2 · 23 February 2008 at 6:39PM

Yes about £300 month from regular income but the majority of that is my maintenance arrears.I also am clearing an average of £100 a month from selling stuff on ebay.So say £400 because I will keep doing that ebay thing and aim for more income from there too.
He pays council tax now for the last 3 months because I just couldnt.
My expenditure is my direct debits previously posted,the phone bill (£120 a quarter)and the gas and elec(they are usually paid on my credit cards but are about £300 a quarter).As well as everything for the kids and special occassions.I have to do the food shopping and am now managing,just, on £50 a week but have been using my credit cards previously for this when I ran out of cash.
Oh and my credit cards,catalogues and overdrafts.

rainbowbrite_2 · 23 February 2008 at 6:43PM

I am sorry,this is allover the place and really difficult to understand.I have been avoiding it so dont have it worked out on paper.I have not looked at my income and expenditure lately I have just been juggling things,not opening my mail and avoiding the phone.I have dropped all the balls now!!!

savingforarainyday · 23 February 2008 at 6:51PM

Hi, was just looking at soa, but i was wondering if you get the right amount of childbenefit, because it looks to me to be only for one child?

The being at home thing is a difficult one. when only one partner is working. Aside from the debt thing you probably need to discuss the income thing, he may equally feel he is trying to do things on his own, and this may make him feel unreasonalble. Without mentioning debt etc have you asked him how he feels about it. This may be a starting point for you to work together on this. First of all set a budget of all the households expenses. Look at the budget planner tool. I found that really helpful.

You don't really say if you would like to work or you want to be a stay at home mum, it maybe there is some compromise, some employers esp supermarkets etc have some very flexible part-time hours/

Good Luck whatever happens.:A

Gemmzie · 23 February 2008 at 6:53PM

Lots of people find they have no idea how much they are spending until they sort out their SOA - we certainly didnt.

So going out....
Phone - £40 a month
Electric/Gas - £100 a month
Food - £200 a month

Does your partner use the phone/electric/gas/food too? You cannot pay for all these things on £400 and the £400 is probably going to go down once the arrears are cleared.

rainbowbrite_2 · 23 February 2008 at 7:06PM

I want to earn my own money,definately.I already earn £100 a month on ebay selling bits and pieces and have not been able to find a job that fits with school.
I get child benefit for one child as the other is 17 now.He lives at home,doesnt work at the moment as he cant leave the house due to a hopefully temporary mental illness,and he wont claim benefits.
I wrote down my income and expenditure.This is what I should pay but like I said have not paid 2 of my cc,s for 3 months and have maxed out my overdrafts.

Income -from Child benefit,maintenance arrears , tax credit and £100 a month on ebay is £400.
Outgoings monthly-
gas and elec £100
phone £40
Food and toiletries etc £200
tesco cc £37
ulster cc £5
LLoyds cc £154
citi cc £128
Next £17
Littlewoods £10
HSA £10.40
AMERICAN LIFE INS £5.95
INVESTMENTS POLICIES/ENDOWMENT FOR KIDS £50
MY LIFE INS ENDOWMENT £4.33
TOTAL OUT SHOULD BE £761.68 NOT COUNTING THE OVERDRAFTS AND NOT COUNTING ANYTHING FOR THE KIDS(CLOTHES,BITHDAYS,XMAS)

(PLUS I HAVE 2 OVERDRAFTS TOTALLING £1,700)
I forgot to add my prepayment certificate for prescription charges too.

rainbowbrite_2 · 23 February 2008 at 7:13PM

It does take posting the SOA to realise what your situation is.
I really need to be earning a full time wage.No wonder I am in trouble.My partner definately doesnt earn enough to pay these bills too.
This is my lightbulb moment.My head is well and truly out of the sand now.
What next though.I am really worried about the credit cards I have not paid.I am beyond worrying about my credit rating.
I know I need to increase my income nd quick but what about my credit cards in the meantime,I am 3 months behind with the 2 big ones?Advice please.

Gemmzie · 23 February 2008 at 7:15PM

Could you not work longer hours and your 17 year old look after the younger one?

You really do need some more financial support from your partner. It might be difficult to persuade creditors that you contribute so much to a shared household.

Gemmzie · 23 February 2008 at 7:16PM

rainbowbrite wrote: »

It does take posting the SOA to realise what your situation is.
I really need to be earning a full time wage.No wonder I am in trouble.My partner definately doesnt earn enough to pay these bills too.
This is my lightbulb moment.My head is well and truly out of the sand now.

Congrats for getting there

Now we help you find ways to fix it. Good luck

rainbowbrite_2 · 23 February 2008 at 7:31PM

Now that I have realised my situation I am going to go and drink a bottle of wine and forget about it again,just for tonight,its Saturday and I dont want to be depressed.
I,ll be back first thing on monday morning hopefully to read some tips on how to get the cc companies to take it easy on me until I know where I am going to get the additional income from.

I have not paid my credit cards since November

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