Really down and want to give up

tumbleweed261 · 19 January 2007 at 4:55PM

I don't know what to say that hasn't been said already, but I hope you're soon feeling happier

If it's any consolation I went to see Les Mis and fell asleep (was recovering from glandular fever though, I didn't discriminate about where/when I fell asleep) - don't think I really missed much!

Love and hugs, tumble x

nickm122 · 19 January 2007 at 4:57PM

Hey don't be down. You've managed to cut £690 off of your debt in 2 and half months!! thats really good!!

Ya best off telling ya friends that you just can't afford to go out at the moment. Make up something like your saving for like a new car or a holiday or summat!!

Don't put anything moist on ya sandwiches and if people do comment on them, ignore them and you enjoy ya sandwiches!!

If ya really don't want that face cream and it is expensive, someone might buy it off you on ebay. You mite not get what ya paid for it but you will get something!!

And finally, if ya don't get paid for those days, go into your HR and complain. Maybe get some legal advice. But in the mean tie don't worry!

Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but gets you no where!!

Keep smiling.

dancingfairy · 19 January 2007 at 5:08PM

Just wanted to say hi. Firstly don't neglect your health as that will make you feel worse and you can't tackle debt if you're not eating properly. Secondly don't sacrifice everything in your quest to become Debt free. Allow yourself small treats in your budget otherwise you will feel the despair and binge spend. If Starbucks are really important to you - can you have one a week or one a fornight or something - it might take a little longer to reach your debt free date but it's not a race and there's no point cutting back so much it's not sustainable. Remember what is important is yourself and your family and friends (the real ones) - look after yourself.

P.S is there any chance you could apply for a Life of balance card somewhere - don't know how good your credit rating is?

Skint_Catt · 19 January 2007 at 5:21PM

Def ebay the cream - someone will want it!

Try soup for lunch - I find cup a soup Cheese, & Broccoli with Tagliatelle a meal in itself! Buy tins to heat in a bowl in the microwave - if you have one at work - or take it in a thermos. Lovely this time of year! Also if you have a microwave you could buy 8p noodles from Tesco and take those - I used to and all my colleagues could smell it and got jealous!

Also, try pitta bread for sandwiches. With mayo type sarnies (tuna or egg) they get a lot less soggy than normal bread. Chopped up bell peppers are nice in tuna sarnies too (also this mixture on baked pots)!

Sandwich box full of mixed salad or home made pasta salads?

I know it's hard to resist going out with colleagues or friends, but could you make an excuse to go the the Post Office or something, and just get some fresh air? In the spring you could have your lunch alfresco!

Keep going. You need to do what you need to do. Their prob higher in debt than you are, but haven't had their lightbulb moment yet!

S_C

mizmir · 19 January 2007 at 5:42PM

Aw - hugs. Sorry you are feeling so low - it can be a hard slog can't it?
But have you looked at your sig lately? You have paid off 13% of your debt in just 2 months. At that rate you will be debt free in just over a year and then you will be able to spend your money on whatever you like! How many of these "friends" and colleagues will be in that position?

Even if your totals have gone up a bit don't despair - it happens - just recalculate and set new goals - your DFD may be a month or two delayed but it is still coming. You can do this. As others have said - include something in your budget for treats - or save all your £2 coins (or £1s or 50ps or whatever you can afford to squirrel away) in a treat jar - or start selling on eBay or Pigsbacking or whatever just for treats - but make some way to put a little aside each month to spoil you. Then if you need it you can have that treat and if you don't you can throw it at your debts and feel smug about that dfd getting closer! But we all need treats every now and then or life becomes just too demoralising.

Lunches - take fruit, salads, soups etc - tell people you are on a special diet - make a little extra food for dinner and take a portion in for lunch (freeze them so that you have something different).

And don't let ANYONE (not even us :rotfl:) tell you what to do! Do what you do for you - not for anyone else.

Desperate_Housewife_2-2 · 19 January 2007 at 6:24PM

Desperate hosuewife – thank you for your kind words, it means a lot that you took the time to write and add a little bit of encouragement. Ia m already feeling better from all your nice posts.

No probs Deliciosa, glad you are feeling better! Onwards and upwards!

mountainofdebt · 19 January 2007 at 6:59PM

to keep you motivated might be to make a pie chart of where your money goes.......I know it might be depressing at the mo to see a large percentage going on servicing your debts but just remember that when you have paid off your debts that slice of the pie will be yours to do what ever you want to do with it.

Tustastic · 19 January 2007 at 11:59PM

deliciosa wrote:

Tustastic - Thank you, its really hard to respond to bullying colleagues, not even my team because they are great, but other people on my floor. But I was a bit down and my boss asked me why and I said to him that saving is really not easy etc, and he came up with a brilliant idea, namely that if I bring soya milk into the office and I store it in his office (he is the head of legal and got a fridge in his office) then I can make soya lattes for me and I don’t have to pay £1.10 for latte out of the machine – (there is a free machine with real milk but I cant drink that because of my religion), and he said he keeps food there too so I can too. That was so kind, can you believe? And he also said that he is trying to cut back on his starbucks drinks too because he is spending an awful lot every week so saving is not uncool… but I still don’t know what else I can bring as a ready-made lunch, even though I got some great ideas from others here, I’ll react to them later. And yeah you are right about the friend who made me buy the cream – they just don’t care. And once I paid off all my debts I can buy all the expensive creams too, right?? So its only a matter of time... I aim to pay off everything by september…

Deliciosa, your boss sounds lovely! Making a friend of him cancels out the little face-cream meanie by a multiple of about ten. When you know a bit more about what food and drink he likes, you might want to leave treats in the fridge for him from time to time. Hope you are having a glorious weekend already.:)

bobble_hat · 20 January 2007 at 12:07AM

I haven't read through this thread thouroughly and I will in the cold light of day tomorrow, but just wanted to say, January is a yuck month and very depressing. Stick with it, you are doing really well, you can bounce back and bounce up. Hang in there.

LookingAhead · 20 January 2007 at 12:57AM

Hi there Del.

I think I might duplicate ideas for lunch as a lot of other wonderful DFW peeps have already posted.

I was thinking along the lines of:

- Pitta breads & salad/falafel
- Mixed pasta or rice salads in a plastic lunch box
- Thickly cut granary bread sandwiches with houmous & salad (these will not flop about in a plastic lunch box like thinly cut bread) and will keep nicely if you can use that fridge (how lovely of the guy to offer & the soya lattes as well - now that is the kind of support you want!)

If you have access to a microwave then soup, jacket potatoes, vegetable chilli...you can make a batch of chilli then take some in as and when you need it in a lunch box. You could even do curries?

To those people who say "It's only three quid..." and so on, just say to them "Yes but if you do that every day it's £21 a week, that's £84 a month, which is £1008 a YEAR!"

£1008 a year on coffee? They must be mad. That's a decent pay rise if they cut that expenditure out!

Don't let them intimidate you. they *will* get bored eventually. Smile sweetly, re-iterate your need for savings and get on with what you want to do. You can stand up to these people and I think you will feel empowered for it.

Keep coming back here for ideas & support, you will feel better for it.

Really down and want to give up

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