How will getting Married affect my finances?

Malthusian · 9 October 2019 at 10:49AM

YasmineA90 wrote: »

Please tell me how?

Marriage is a purely financial contract. The only aspects enforceable in law are financial. Everything else exists only in your heads.

If you don't want to share your finances, don't marry.

Advice received from both my solicitor and online both say that debt incurred before becoming in a relationship are that persons sole responsibility.

If you own £100,000 and he owes £50,000 in his sole name, and you are unmarried, you can walk away at any time with your £100,000. His debt is his problem.

If you are married, and divorce, and it's not a short marriage and the courts take the default position of a 50/50 split, that means your joint net assets are £50,000 so you get £25,000 and he gets £25,000. On the plus side, you won't be liable for the £25,000 he will still owe after using his £25k divorce settlement to pay off what he can.

That would be subject to negotiation between you, child maintenance, etc etc, but that's the default position (if it's not a short marriage where the courts try to put you back in the position you came in).

Regardless and without a doubt, in the event of a divorce, he would accept whatever payout I was to offer (which would be generous).

There is always doubt.

Malthusian · 9 October 2019 at 11:38AM

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

As always when this gets mentioned as a downside of not marrying, there are things to remind everyone of. First, 'next of kin' is not defined in law, carries no legal status nor any authority over treatment (as we would all hope, doctors make treatment decisions, not untrained members of the public), it is simply who the treating doctors will update on the condition of the patient, and second you can nominate next of kin on admittance to hospital, and/or carry a card nominating in case of being unconscious. This information can also be recorded with the GP.

You can make a Lasting Power of Attorney for Health and Welfare, which grants your attorney the right to discuss your treatment and make decisions as if they were you.

Untrained members of the public have a perfect right to override doctors' decisions about their own treatment, if they have mental capacity. If the doctors think the patient's amateur decisions on their treatment are the wrong one then that is tough biscuits, unless they want to go through the procedure of getting them sectioned.

Attorneys have the same right if the patient granted it to them. (Although they are constrained by the right to act in the donor's interests at all times, while donors are free to act against their own interests, within the constraints of the Mental Health Act. In other words, a donor is free to decide they want to treat their cancer with homeopathy, if they have capacity, but an attorney cannot, unless the donor has left specific instructions to that end.)

There is no such thing as next of kin, only Wills and Powers of Attorney. In the absence of those the Government decides.

Iwanttobefree · 14 October 2019 at 10:49PM

I don't know whether any of this is relevant today or not.

I've been with my wife for 38 years (since she was 16 and I 18).

We decided to get married in 1991 as she was pregnant and we wanted us both to have the same surname.

So we got married a week before our first child was born.

When my daughter was born, I felt like an outcast by the way the authorities acted towards me, it was as though I as the husband didn't exist, we would go to things as a couple, but everything was aimed at my wife, wasn't interested in anything I had to say.

This annoyed both my wife and me. So we decided we would claim child benefit in my name, so that officially (on paper) it looked like I was actually part of my daughters life. Big mistake.

My wife had a few years off work when the children were young, and if we understand correctly, had the child benefit been in her name, she would have got her ni contributions to her pension paid for by the state.

But because it was in my name (at the time I was working and in a private pension scheme) we now find ourselves in a situation where my pension contributions are paid in full, hence qualify for the full state pension, but my wife still has 8 years to go before hers is.

Comms69 · 15 October 2019 at 8:47AM

Iwanttobefree wrote: »

I don't know whether any of this is relevant today or not.

I've been with my wife for 38 years (since she was 16 and I 18).

We decided to get married in 1991 as she was pregnant and we wanted us both to have the same surname.

So we got married a week before our first child was born.

When my daughter was born, I felt like an outcast by the way the authorities acted towards me, it was as though I as the husband didn't exist, we would go to things as a couple, but everything was aimed at my wife, wasn't interested in anything I had to say.

This annoyed both my wife and me. So we decided we would claim child benefit in my name, so that officially (on paper) it looked like I was actually part of my daughters life. Big mistake.

My wife had a few years off work when the children were young, and if we understand correctly, had the child benefit been in her name, she would have got her ni contributions to her pension paid for by the state.

But because it was in my name (at the time I was working and in a private pension scheme) we now find ourselves in a situation where my pension contributions are paid in full, hence qualify for the full state pension, but my wife still has 8 years to go before hers is.

Yes that is still the case.

Classic case of your pride taking over there. Why does it matter what bob from the council thinks?

sleepless_saver · 15 October 2019 at 4:38PM

You might be able to transfer your entitlement to HRP.
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/national-insurance-application-form-for-home-responsibilities-protection-cf411

"Transferring entitlement to HRP
Sometimes the person who was in paid employment claimed Child Benefit, rather
than the person who was staying at home to care for the child. For tax years from
6 April 1978 to 5 April 2010, if the Child Benefit claimant already had a qualifying
year on their National Insurance account during the period of HRP, their spouse,
partner or civil partner can apply to have the HRP transferred to their own
National Insurance account.
You need to meet certain conditions for HRP to be transferred. These are:
• you reached State Pension age on or after 6 April 2008 or, in the case of a
bereavement benefit claim, your spouse or civil partner died on or after that date
• the Child Benefit claimant cannot themselves benefit from HRP because their
earnings were equal to or above the qualifying earnings factor for that year
• you were living with the Child Benefit claimant for the relevant period and you
were sharing the care for a child under 16
• you would have been able to get Child Benefit if your spouse, partner or civil
partner had not been awarded it
• you are a family member who cares for a child under 12 where you are related to
the child, you can apply for Specified Adult Childcare credits instead
Go to https://www.gov.uk/boost!state!pension/overview for more information. If you are
a parent you may also want to look at ‘Transferring entitlement for credits for
parents and carers’. You need to fill in form ‘CF411A Application form for credits for
parents and carers’. For more information on credits for parents and carers
go to www.hmrc.gov.uk"

Iwanttobefree · 15 October 2019 at 6:29PM

sleepless_saver wrote: »

You might be able to transfer your entitlement to HRP.
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/national-insurance-application-form-for-home-responsibilities-protection-cf411

"Transferring entitlement to HRP
Sometimes the person who was in paid employment claimed Child Benefit, rather
than the person who was staying at home to care for the child. For tax years from
6 April 1978 to 5 April 2010, if the Child Benefit claimant already had a qualifying
year on their National Insurance account during the period of HRP, their spouse,
partner or civil partner can apply to have the HRP transferred to their own
National Insurance account.
You need to meet certain conditions for HRP to be transferred. These are:
• you reached State Pension age on or after 6 April 2008 or, in the case of a
bereavement benefit claim, your spouse or civil partner died on or after that date
• the Child Benefit claimant cannot themselves benefit from HRP because their
earnings were equal to or above the qualifying earnings factor for that year
• you were living with the Child Benefit claimant for the relevant period and you
were sharing the care for a child under 16
• you would have been able to get Child Benefit if your spouse, partner or civil
partner had not been awarded it
• you are a family member who cares for a child under 12 where you are related to
the child, you can apply for Specified Adult Childcare credits instead
Go to https://www.gov.uk/boost!state!pension/overview for more information. If you are
a parent you may also want to look at ‘Transferring entitlement for credits for
parents and carers’. You need to fill in form ‘CF411A Application form for credits for
parents and carers’. For more information on credits for parents and carers
go to www.hmrc.gov.uk"

Thanks, we've filled out the online form through Gov gateway.

seven-day-weekend · 16 October 2019 at 6:04AM

I have been married for 48 years. I had a discussion once that if, heaven forbid, I was widowed, and then met someone else, would I get married again? And after thinking bout it, I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't. I would not want someone else's family to benefit from what my husband and I had built up together, which should go to our son.

So,if you don't want to share your assets/finances, don't get married.

Slinky · 16 October 2019 at 7:50AM

paddy's_mum wrote: »

Is this the same person you described very early on in your membership of MSE as abusive and violent?

26th July 2016

If this marriage goes ahead, it will be the triumph of hope over experience.

Iwanttobefree · 11 November 2019 at 7:03PM

sleepless_saver wrote: »

You might be able to transfer your entitlement to HRP.
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/national-insurance-application-form-for-home-responsibilities-protection-cf411

"Transferring entitlement to HRP
Sometimes the person who was in paid employment claimed Child Benefit, rather
than the person who was staying at home to care for the child. For tax years from
6 April 1978 to 5 April 2010, if the Child Benefit claimant already had a qualifying
year on their National Insurance account during the period of HRP, their spouse,
partner or civil partner can apply to have the HRP transferred to their own
National Insurance account.
You need to meet certain conditions for HRP to be transferred. These are:
• you reached State Pension age on or after 6 April 2008 or, in the case of a
bereavement benefit claim, your spouse or civil partner died on or after that date
• the Child Benefit claimant cannot themselves benefit from HRP because their
earnings were equal to or above the qualifying earnings factor for that year
• you were living with the Child Benefit claimant for the relevant period and you
were sharing the care for a child under 16
• you would have been able to get Child Benefit if your spouse, partner or civil
partner had not been awarded it
• you are a family member who cares for a child under 12 where you are related to
the child, you can apply for Specified Adult Childcare credits instead
Go to https://www.gov.uk/boost!state!pension/overview for more information. If you are
a parent you may also want to look at ‘Transferring entitlement for credits for
parents and carers’. You need to fill in form ‘CF411A Application form for credits for
parents and carers’. For more information on credits for parents and carers
go to www.hmrc.gov.uk"

My wife has now received a letter and they have given her the 9 years that she missed out on.

Many many thanks for your helpful suggestion

sleepless_saver · 13 November 2019 at 10:10PM

Iwanttobefree wrote: »

My wife has now received a letter and they have given her the 9 years that she missed out on.

Many many thanks for your helpful suggestion

That's great, I'm just glad it worked.

How will getting Married affect my finances?

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