Getting a Child integrated into Nursery
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In modern society, having the ability to be a stay at home parent is a luxury, unless you have a squad of kids then it may be better off staying at home...0
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In modern society, having the ability to be a stay at home parent is a luxury, unless you have a squad of kids then it may be better off staying at home...
It's not a luxury, sorry but that's simply not true.
What you're doing is putting your other luxuries first. (to be clear, live however you want to, but don't hide behind that statement)0 -
It's not a luxury, sorry but that's simply not true.
What you're doing is putting your other luxuries first. (to be clear, live however you want to, but don't hide behind that statement)
What about the large work force in the NHS particularly doctors who have worked long and hard to get a profession and make up more than 50% of the work force.
Is your argument that none of them should be mothers or they should give up their careers and the care they can give to you and yours.
Just because you are a stay at home Mum doesn’t make you a good Mum. Mums who who work and are stimulated through their work may be better Mums in the end?0 -
Ah I think we're going off on a tangent here folks........0
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It's not a luxury, sorry but that's simply not true.
What you're doing is putting your other luxuries first. (to be clear, live however you want to, but don't hide behind that statement)
As ognum implied, I'd hardly call using your education and training to work a luxury. Or what's wrong with just going to work because you want to.
SAHM (or dad) is a fairly modern concept. When multi generations of families lived together it was often the grandparents or aunts or older children that looked after the babies not necessarily the child's own parents.gettingtheresometime wrote: »Ah I think we're going off on a tangent here folks........
You're right but OP did sound a bit guilty for sending his son to nursery so I think it's appropriate to put the other points of view.0 -
What about the large work force in the NHS particularly doctors who have worked long and hard to get a profession and make up more than 50% of the work force. - Doctors don't make up more than 50% of the workforce in the NHS.
Is your argument that none of them should be mothers or they should give up their careers and the care they can give to you and yours. - No? My opinion, not an argument - you seem to want to turn it into that - is that a child should be with a parent - mum or dad.
Just because you are a stay at home Mum doesn’t make you a good Mum. - i'm a man.... Mums who who work and are stimulated through their work may be better Mums in the end?
Maybe, but... triggered much? I didn't get personal with you, but you (wrongly for obvious reasons) were happy to call me a bad mum; let's say bad parent.
I agree that the OP should get both sides of the coinAs ognum implied, I'd hardly call using your education and training to work a luxury. Or what's wrong with just going to work because you want to. - nothing. If that's what you and your OH agree. Also nothing wrong with being a SAH parent. I objected to the statement that it was a 'luxury' that was not possible in 'modern times'.
SAHM (or dad) is a fairly modern concept. When multi generations of families lived together it was often the grandparents or aunts or older children that looked after the babies not necessarily the child's own parents. - Not necessarily.
You're right but OP did sound a bit guilty for sending his son to nursery so I think it's appropriate to put the other points of view.0 -
Maybe, but... triggered much? I didn't get personal with you, but you (wrongly for obvious reasons) were happy to call me a bad mum; let's say bad parent.
I agree that the OP should get both sides of the coin
Firstly I did not intend to call you a bad parent my point was that just because you are a staying at home parent doesn’t necessarily make you a good parent.
Sorry my point was 50% of the doctors in the NHS are women, should we stop them from becoming parents or stop them from working and providing vital care to the community.
I am not trying to argue with you at all, child care is a decision for parents. I have seen good and bad experiences in many different scenarios, it’s not all good one way or another even though you believe it is0 -
Firstly I did not intend to call you a bad parent my point was that just because you are a staying at home parent doesn’t necessarily make you a good parent. - sure I understand, and just to be clear I was the working parent, but my partner wanted to stay at home and was able to concentrate on enhancing the kids experiences and education - they are all top performers at school; so whilst anecdotal, I believe it was time well spent. I want to be clear that I'm not suggesting for a second anyone be forced into such an arrangement
Sorry my point was 50% of the doctors in the NHS are women - ah I see, not sure if that's true, but broadly speaking it doesn't matter as I was no making this gender specific - either parent can be the SAHP. , should we stop them from becoming parents or stop them from working and providing vital care to the community. - not suggesting for a second this become mandatory. (I hate state intervention in the home)
I am not trying to argue with you at all, child care is a decision for parents. - totally agree, I said as much
I have seen good and bad experiences in many different scenarios, it’s not all good one way or another even though you believe it is
Again I'm not, and haven't, said this is a 1 size fits all situation. Simply providing my opinion.
Ultimately that isn't going to make a difference to the decisions others make (and if it does, I don't think they should be deciding what's best for a child - I'm just a stranger on the internet!)0 -
Why do such discussion always go on the basis of what we, as parents, think is best as a matter of principle, for all children?
My experience is that some kids will fare great at nursery whilst others won't. In the case of my kids, now older teenagers. Is that ideally, I think my second would have done better with a SAHM or at least going PT. Then again, he is naturally a Ln introverted child and maybe being in nursery helped him adjust at earlier age and learn to be more sociable than he would otherwise have been. I'll never know.
However I have no doubts whatsoever that being at nursery ft was the best for my eldest. From the moment she was born she needed tons of stimulation to a le El that would have very difficult to sustain as a SAHM. She loved nursery from the moment she started.
It's natural as parents to assume that our children would always pick to be with us if given the chance. I'm not sure that is always the case no matter what good parent we are. Of course, a lot of this depends on the ability to secure a place in a very good nursery.0 -
When my son (now 14 and his teachers can't say enough good things about him) started school, his foundation year teacher told me that they could tell which children had been to nursery as they were much more independent, sociable and coped better with the transition to school. It's also handy because they already have friends if the school that they go to is near to the nursery.
Your son will be fine - it's good for potty/toilet training too because the younger children cope the slightly older ones. You however will be a nervous wreck. Get used to this - it's a parenting thing for the forseeable future. Incidentally we solved the crying when being left at nursery thing once he was older by not saying goodbye. My late husband discovered by accident that if you just shoved the child through the door and didn't follow him, said child trundled off to join his mates quite happily without as much as a backward glance.0
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