Losing sleep counting sheep! And still no money!

morphette

:(Can anyone help me please I feel so lonely and at a very low point in my life. Sorry this may take a while. I live with my partner and our 3 year old and my partner works full time and I work three days a week part time. Child care is so expensive that I have no option but to work part time which is annoying as I was on a high salary job before I had my daughter but it involved a lot of overseas travelling and I simply couldn't afford childcare costs whilst I was away or the thought of leaving my 4 month old baby(at the time I returned back to work afdter maternity) for 4 weeks whilst working abroad. It was a hard decision but as a result I took on a local full time job and took a massive £20k pay cut in order to be closer to home and have a normal 9 to 5 office job even though I was over qualified. As a result the debts have got bigger as my once affulent lifestyle came crashing down on me and realisation has only sank in recently that I am struggling each month, my health is suffering through worrying and me and my partner constantly argue over money.

I got my partner out of debt stupidly at the end of last year and since January 2008 he earns enough money to pay all of his debts and direct debits each month including the mortgage and the council tax which is both our names. He is normally left with about £10 at the end of month but at least he is not getting hefty £30 charges from Halifax anymore and he no longer has an overdraft. He still has credit cards he is paying off but he doesn't have any credit on them so he can't spend on them. Overall I am proud of myself (he is a lazy git) that I have managed to sort his fianances out but as a result now feel very guilty that I have neglected my own finances and now face the possibility of bankruptcy.

I now work part time - I had to go to part time work as child care costs increased and I just wasn't able to afford it on a full time salary so before I was struggling to find £800 a month to pay my debts on a full time salary and now on a part time salary I am having to find £1200 a month extra to pay off my debts which is proving very hard.

I am now in arears with three major credit cards, one store card and one catalogue company. Arears of approx 2 months on all of them and the constant calls are making me ill!

I am calling CCCS tomorrow to get some advise as in total on unsecured debts I owe £32k approx.

Can anyone offer advise on the following if I do decide to go bankrupt:

In total I owe about £32000. all unsecured debt.

But then my name is on a joint kitchen loan which I am meant to pay but I am two months in arears(my partner can't add this to his Direct debits as it would send him into an unauthorised overdraft and he earns as much as he can just to stay in credit as he does each month. This is the third time this year that I have not been able to pay this loan. What would happen if I went Bankrupt would the debt be passed to my other half? He can't afford to pay it without maybe getting a second job which he simply hasn't the time to do as he already works late at his full time job to earn overtime.

We also have a joint secured loan on the house but our lodgers rent pays for that which goes into our joint bank account and the direct debit for that secured loan goes out of the joint account. We have never defaulted on this payment.

The mortgage is interest only ( I know bad move but it was the only way we could get onto the housing market three years ago) and whilst it is in both names the payments (fixed for three years) comes form my partners account and as I've said he makes sure he has enough money each month to pay things like that. We have never defaulted on our mortgage payments

The council tax bill which is also in both names comes from his account too.Again we have never defaulted on this.

In light of this, if I declared myself bankrupt and if CCCS say that is my best option how would it affect those loans etc where my name is on them as mentioned above..... I am so scared we will lose the house.

I have a very old audi(worth approx £800) and my partner has an old van. Would I be able to keep the car as I need it to take my daughter to nursery and I need it to get to my part time job.Also my car is an automatic as I can't drive a manual after I had a car accident years ago and I would not be able to drive the van for instance if they took the audi away. Also we wouldn't be able to take our little girl to Nursery in a van as it surely wouldn't be legal to have her sit in a car seat in the front of a van?

I teach spanish at home on a monday during the day and evening in order to bring in some extra cash, I sell stuff on ebay and I started two self employed part time businesses in January which do alright but don't bring in enough money to pay the whole £1200 that I am short each month but they do help. If I go bankrupt how would it affect these two businesses???

Also would I have to tell my new employers (went part time beginning of May with a new company) that I have been made bankrupt?

If any one can offer any guidance I would really appreciate it and sorry it is such a long story.

Thank you for listening.

Mrs_Bones

Hello Morphette and welcome

I'm sorry I can't be much help to you with your questions tonight, I'm only just starting down this road myself, but I did not want you to think you were alone. I'v had great help from people on this forum and I'm sure in the morning you will get some great answers to help you out. You are doing the right thing getting in touch with CCCS I found them helpful and also CAB have been brilliant at helping me, is there one of them close to you?

morphette

Mrs_Bones wrote: »

Hello Morphette and welcome

I'm sorry I can't be much help to you with your questions tonight, I'm only just starting down this road myself, but I did not want you to think you were alone. I'v had great help from people on this forum and I'm sure in the morning you will get some great answers to help you out. You are doing the right thing getting in touch with CCCS I found them helpful and also CAB have been brilliant at helping me, is there one of them close to you?

Mrs Bones the fact that there is someone out there on this lonely night is enough to make me smile and wipe away my tears. I can't sleep again and here I am sat infront of the computer trying to sell more crap that we don't use from the house on ebay in the hope that it will bring in some money to pay off some of my debt but I know I need to call CCCS tomorrow but am scared and alone. Thank you so much just for posting back this late I really really appreciate it! Big huG (best I can muster at the moment!) xx

gettingbetter

Hi

all i can say is dont hide anything

talk to someone who knows what they are doing

i buried my head in the sand

shredded letter from everyone

i got made bankrupt in may

and only told hubby last week

no my family are having problems speaking to me

i know its not the same as your probs

but believe me you dont want to go down this route

morphette

gettingbetter wrote: »

Hi

all i can say is dont hide anything

talk to someone who knows what they are doing

i buried my head in the sand

shredded letter from everyone

i got made bankrupt in may

and only told hubby last week

no my family are having problems speaking to me

i know its not the same as your probs

but believe me you dont want to go down this route

Hi not sure what your last sentence actually meant "...you don't want to go down this route"...but I will take everything else you mention onboard. My partner knows that I am thinking of going Bankrupt and he feels very guilty which again causes arguements simply because I get all defensive - if I hadn't maxed out all the credit cards to pay off his debts I wouldn't be in this position myself now! I think I won;t tell my parents - they are elderly and live in Spain and I don't see them often as I can't afford to go visit and if they knew they would go mad! My partner and I agreed that if I do go bankrupt that we won't tell friends or his family either although am sure they will read it in the local paper as I don't exactly have a very english sounding name and it will take up half the paper to write it!:rotfl: I made myself laugh with that thought!! First time today!Sorry this morning! The only things is that my ex husband will see it and I couldn't bear for him to find out even though we haven't spoken or seen each other in 4 years! It's just the worry of not knowing if we will loose the house if I delcare myself Bankrupt even though mortgage is in both names but partner pays it out of his wages. I am nearing 40 and doubt I will ever get to own another house if I did go bankrupt and I would hate not to be able to leave my daughter something when i die, although with all this stress and my health problems recently that may be sooner than later! Thanks anyway for replying. I appreciate any one replying with their suggestions etc.

gettingbetter

dont go down this route

i meant i hid everything and i mean everything

my oh didnt know we were bankrupt till after it had happened

my parents found out cause they are guarantor for my house

i feel really alone and need to dig my way out

the folks on this board are great and offer really good advice

you aint alone

i told my daughters dad that i had i had fallen out with the bank and closed account

yes i cant tell him the truth as he would lord it over me

one thing that was suggested to me (not on this forum) can you put house in your hubbys name

dont know if it works

i just wish i had asked for help sooner

dollydumpling

Hi Morphette, can't help with advice but didn't want to read and run so I'm just saying hello in the hope that you won't feel so alone.

DD x

gettingbetter

just wanted to add

i dont know about your house

i am lucky in some ways i have mortgage for £30,000 and house is worth offers over £200,000 ex council

someone will be along who has more knowledge than me

i am also in scotland so the rules and regs are different

chin up and keep smiling

easier said than done i know

dalip

morphette wrote: »

:(Can anyone help me please I feel so lonely and at a very low point in my life. Sorry this may take a while. I live with my partner and our 3 year old and my partner works full time and I work three days a week part time. Child care is so expensive that I have no option but to work part time which is annoying as I was on a high salary job before I had my daughter but it involved a lot of overseas travelling and I simply couldn't afford childcare costs whilst I was away or the thought of leaving my 4 month old baby(at the time I returned back to work afdter maternity) for 4 weeks whilst working abroad. It was a hard decision but as a result I took on a local full time job and took a massive £20k pay cut in order to be closer to home and have a normal 9 to 5 office job even though I was over qualified. As a result the debts have got bigger as my once affulent lifestyle came crashing down on me and realisation has only sank in recently that I am struggling each month, my health is suffering through worrying and me and my partner constantly argue over money.

I got my partner out of debt stupidly at the end of last year and since January 2008 he earns enough money to pay all of his debts and direct debits each month including the mortgage and the council tax which is both our names. He is normally left with about £10 at the end of month but at least he is not getting hefty £30 charges from Halifax anymore and he no longer has an overdraft. He still has credit cards he is paying off but he doesn't have any credit on them so he can't spend on them. Overall I am proud of myself (he is a lazy git) that I have managed to sort his fianances out but as a result now feel very guilty that I have neglected my own finances and now face the possibility of bankruptcy.

I now work part time - I had to go to part time work as child care costs increased and I just wasn't able to afford it on a full time salary so before I was struggling to find £800 a month to pay my debts on a full time salary and now on a part time salary I am having to find £1200 a month extra to pay off my debts which is proving very hard.

I am now in arears with three major credit cards, one store card and one catalogue company. Arears of approx 2 months on all of them and the constant calls are making me ill!

I am calling CCCS tomorrow to get some advise as in total on unsecured debts I owe £32k approx.

Can anyone offer advise on the following if I do decide to go bankrupt:

In total I owe about £32000. all unsecured debt.

But then my name is on a joint kitchen loan which I am meant to pay but I am two months in arears(my partner can't add this to his Direct debits as it would send him into an unauthorised overdraft and he earns as much as he can just to stay in credit as he does each month. This is the third time this year that I have not been able to pay this loan. What would happen if I went Bankrupt would the debt be passed to my other half? yes any debts in joint names get passed to the op to payHe can't afford to pay it without maybe getting a second job which he simply hasn't the time to do as he already works late at his full time job to earn overtime.

We also have a joint secured loan on the house but our lodgers rent pays for that which goes into our joint bank account and the direct debit for that secured loan goes out of the joint account. We have never defaulted on this payment.

The mortgage is interest only ( I know bad move but it was the only way we could get onto the housing market three years ago) and whilst it is in both names the payments (fixed for three years) comes form my partners account and as I've said he makes sure he has enough money each month to pay things like that. We have never defaulted on our mortgage payments

The council tax bill which is also in both names comes from his account too.Again we have never defaulted on this.

In light of this, if I declared myself bankrupt and if CCCS say that is my best option how would it affect those loans etc where my name is on them as mentioned above..... I am so scared we will lose the house.Not sure about the secured loan.

I have a very old audi(worth approx £800) and my partner has an old van. Would I be able to keep the car as I need it to take my daughter to nursery and I need it to get to my part time job.As you need it for work you may get to keep it,up to the OR.Also my car is an automatic as I can't drive a manual after I had a car accident years ago and I would not be able to drive the van for instance if they took the audi away. Also we wouldn't be able to take our little girl to Nursery in a van as it surely wouldn't be legal to have her sit in a car seat in the front of a van?

I teach spanish at home on a monday during the day and evening in order to bring in some extra cash, I sell stuff on ebay and I started two self employed part time businesses in January which do alright but don't bring in enough money to pay the whole £1200 that I am short each month but they do help. If I go bankrupt how would it affect these two businesses???Dont think so but again not my forte

Also would I have to tell my new employers (went part time beginning of May with a new company) that I have been made bankrupt?not unless it is the sort of job you are not allowed to do whilst bc.

If any one can offer any guidance I would really appreciate it and sorry it is such a long story.

Thank you for listening.

You need to talk to either CCCS or national debtline,telephone numbers in my sig. This is vital as the judge will as if you have taken legal advice before he declares you bc. If they reccomend bc then you need to ring your local court and find out what sort of system they operate. Some you have to book an appointment others its a drop in ,also ask how many cpiesof your SOA(statement of affairs) you need,some it's one and they copy them for you and others it's 3. The fees are £485 per person for bc. Get bac to you later after you have made that call.D

GettingHopeful

Just to say all the very best Morphette - I'm not experienced enough yet to advise but have to say the CAB were fantastic, so if you can get to see them face to face, am sure that would be helpful.

Also my circumstances changed, through choice though, from a well paid but stressful job, but I didn't cut expenses, which is where this started for me. CAB said change of income but maintaining same standard of living was a common scenario and to put that down as one of the causes on the SOA.

Thinking of you, I am often around at late hours, but sorry I didn't pick up your thread last night.

JPS29

Hi Morphette and welcome to the board.

I know too well about leading an affluent lifestyle and then having massive cuts in income (hence me now being BR;) )

Regarding the suggestion about changing the house into your OH name, DON'T DO IT, the OR will ask if you have diposed of any assetts/property in x years prior to your BR and will want to go through it with you. They can also check the land registry and if they find out you are trying to hide things the experience will be far worse than need be.

Whether you will keep the house depends on what equity you have in the house. As this is shared with your OH (joint names) then this figure is halved. So theoritically if there is 10k equity in the house, 5k is yours. The OR would offer for your OH, or someone else, family etc to buy your share (benficial interest BI) back from them at the going rate. How much is the difference between your redemption figure including secured loans and the market value???

Regarding the businesses you have started up..... As a non discharged BR you are not allowed to run a LTD company. If these are sole traders then you will be fine with these but you will have to let the OR know about them. The only thing is that your accounts will be frozen and closed, meaning you will only be alloed a "basic" account.

As dalip mentioned any debts in joint names will fall wholly to your OH (not just "his" half) so be ready for this.

As soon as you know you are definitiely going Br stop paying the debts solely in your name, credit cards/unsecured etc. You can use the money you are saving to pay for your BR fees and to stock up the fridge/cupboards/freezer.

You may be feeling down at the moment, but once all this is sorted you will feel a lot better. Also the arguments should stop when you know what you are doing to, half the time they are caused by the stress of debt, not necessarily each other (I know from experience:o )

Keep us updated how you get on.

Best Wishes

ITBS