Help, need a career change. Any Ideas?

JC67

bobsa1

Does your employer provide any type of counselling scheme as this often includes career counselling. If not you could find out what your training and development department offers.

Liz19

Savvy_Sue wrote:

I agree with nearlyrich, but I'd also make sure to sit down and talk to OH. While you want to be supportive, he needs a plan - what to do at uni, and what to do after uni. Also together and with the children as well you need to work out what sacrifices you're all prepared to make to allow this to happen. After a reality check on that level he may not be so ready to jack it all in - and if he is, then at least he's doing it with his eyes open!

You, meanwhile, might want to see what's on offer through your local adult education service. There may be day courses, or there may be courses starting in January, which would help equip you for the workplace and / or boost your confidence! Anyone who's been a mum for 13 years has valuable skills in diplomacy, time management and people management, not to mention budgeting and project planning!

Thanks for the helpful advice. I have contacted my local college and am looking at taking a computer course soon. I am still struggling with the situation as OH is not really discussing it in practical terms but is dropping strong hints to kids about mum going out to work and also showing me every job advert going. I don't know whether he is just going through a bad patch as he has done this before but he does seem keen for me to get a job practically overnight doing anything which is making me feel resentful and underpressure. For me to go out to work would, as you say, mean retraining which is not going to happen instantly.

flossy_splodge

Hey Liz19, just remember you have choices! There are obviously some things going on with your OH that you want to have a good discussion about, in the first instance have you thought about Relate? They are not just for people wanting to break up - they also offer real help in communication difficulties. You can go as a couple of course but if this meets with resistance(!) you can also go on your own just to talk things through. the worst thing of all I believe is feeling isolated and unable to talk about how things are for you and Relate understand that. If you are not keen on the counselling route how about your OH having a coaching session? (whilst he still has an income to pay for it!). He may be feeling trapped too and not as able as you to express himself so perhaps just digging his heels in? Many many people find opening up to their loved ones really difficult. Strange you might think as it would be nice to believe that's the easiest port of call but remember that for many their nearest and dearest are the ones whose opinion matters most and if there is a sense of unease but no clear idea of why or what to do it might be difficult to put that on the table for fear of ridicule/upset/misunderstanding....
Just don't get steam rollered into quick decisions you are not happy with. Even if the OH has been feeling bad for a while, if he has only just raised this with you you deserve time together to sort it properly. Good Luck and pm me if you think I can help further. (I am a life coach so can give some thoughts on the benefits if you like). Keep smiling.x

toadhall

i was in the same boat too, slowly going round the twist. but in march i became a student nurse at the grand age of 38 - not oldest either. i love it and should have taken the plunge years ago. it is hard juggling 3 kids under 10 and livestock too but it was definitly the best decision i ever made and i have the support of the family which is essential.

sweetjamster

if you don't mind me asking, how old are you bobsa1?

talkshop

Blair needs a new poodle , so I hear.

Might be worth a CV

shopndrop

I work P/T in local government (21 hours) and used to always work extra on "my days off". I was off ill a short while ago only for a couple of days but it was the first time in over 5 years that I have been off ill. Since I returned to work I decided that I would only work my 21 hours. After a couple of weeks the work was starting to pile up but my boss just said "OK it looks like you need some junior help" and I got it. This has made such a difference to my work/life balance. Maybe worth a try. Life is too short to do nothing if you are unhappy.