can partner adopt my daughter?

beautyqueen88

this isnt really moneysaving so please move it if it is in the wrong place but any advice would be appreciated.
i have a daughter who is nearly 2 and i have been with my partner since she was 4months old and we plan to marry next year, her biological father hasnt had anything to do with her and isnt on the birth certificate.
he did see her about 5 times after she was born but then admitted he didnt want anything to do with her.
anyway my partner wants to adopt her so that she is legally his.
does anyone know where i start and what it involves? i was adopted myself so my mum has given me some idea of what happens but that was years ago and im sure things will have changed,also that was a straightforward adoption whereas this seems a little more complicated.
i know her biological father will quite happily co-operate so will this be straight forward paperwork or are we in for a long drawn out process?
thanks for any advice in advance

hobo28

I don't know about adoption but you could give him Parental Responsibility since your ex is not named on the birth certificate.

You can both sign a parental responsibility agreement in front of a clerk of the court or judge. You will both need ID like passport, birth certificates for daughter etc.

The form can be found here: http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/cpra2_1205.pdf

traciekan

you need to contact social services and apply to the court BUt you have to adopt her too. this is what puts many people off doing it.

whitewing

From my little bit of understanding.. when you are married you can give your husband parental responsibility thro a solicitor/court without the father having a say if he doesn't have pr himself. (Not sure if he does).

Could also apply for a residency order (automatically giving pr?) - not too sure about this looking into myself at the moment.

As far as I understand, neither of the above stops father being financially responsible for his child.

Adoption means the stepdad would be financially responsible, I think, which is I guess what you are after amongst other stuff. Don't know about that side of things, I'm afraid.

pulliptears

If the father isnt named on the birth certificate it should be a simple process. When social services contact you and ask if you know who the father is say no.

If, like me, you say Yes, you will end up going through 12 months of legal wranglings and pleading to SS's common sense as to why a compulsive thief and drug addict should not be asked for consent to have his son adopted when his name doesnt even appear on the birth certificate.

happily, the judge did have some common sense and the adoption went ahead. The lady from SS was not happy about it at all!

arthur_dent_2

My cousin never new his father and after his mum found and married a new bloke, he was adopted by the husband. I don't think it was very difficult and my cousin thinks of the husband as dad. He is now 19.

cally1978

I am in the process of my partner adopting my 2 children, it is quite straightforward. My ex is named on both birth certificates but has no access through his own choice, issues like this are taken into account as are my childrens wishes as they are 11 and 7. Although my ex will be asked to give his consent this is not vital as the judge will rule in favour of the best interests of the child.

I began the process by getting in touch with social services and filled in an initial step parent adoption form, they then arranged to visit and discussed things further with us to ensure we understood all of the issues involved.....the social worker agreed to back us and told us to apply to court which we have now done, it costs £140 per child to file the application at court. The next stage is preparation of reports for all sides which includes doctors reports, school reports, assessment of my choldrens understanding etc and then it goes to the judge who will make the decision.

BTW in the initial stages local authority checks and CRB checks are required from yourself and your partner.

Hope this helps.

Stephb1986_2

I've been watching a programme recently called Heir Hunters i cant remember what channel its on, but anyway this bloke had died and had a son who was 20 odd, anyway he had distant counsins ect ect but because his son had been adopted by his mums new partner he wasnt entitled to any of his dads money.

Just a thought for everyone that if your partners do adopt your child/children that they will not be entitled to any of their biological fathers estate.

HTH

Steph xx

Vomityspice

Step parent adoption is relatively straight forward (I am a Social Worker), and the process is simple enough for most people to undertake without the help of a solicitor.

The requirement to adopt yourself has been removed as of the Children Act 2004.

In my experience, the only difficulty you will have is obtaining the consent of the biological father. The Social Worker undertaking the report will not accept 'it was a one night stand, I don't remember his name, etc' and will often refuse to complete the report (effectively scuppering any chance of the adoption going through!). Whilst, there are occasions when it is impossible to trace the father, the worker undertaking the report has to indicate that the mother has been as helpful as possible (i.e. has told the truth and the SW believes them). In my experience, I don't know of ANY adoptions that were completed (In our area) when the mother was less than forthcoming with information. I realise that other posters have suggested you lie but believe me, this will go down like a lead balloon. Don' t be surprised if your Local Authority simply refuses to proceed with your application!

My specific advice is tell them EVERY thing that you know, even if it's just you know the Aunty lives XXXX. The Court requires that the SW attempts to trace the father (SW are usually very efficient in this respect!), before they will countenance granting an Order.

Given that you have indicated the father hasn't been involved it is likely that he will consent to an Order being made (as he will then not be liable for Child Support), but you also need to consider the impact of inheritance that adoption will have. If your ex is a millionaire, after adoption, your child won't be entitled to anything (unless expressed in a will).

In terms of timescales, you will be looking at 9 months minimum (you never know, it might be less). However, your application is completely dependent on the Social Worker's report. Step-parent adoptions aren't seen as high priority, so much so, I used to give them to SW students to do (as it is time limited and usually not contentious). Your local Authority may be more organised? However, I cannot stress to highly the need to try to be as helpful as you can. I.e. if all the information can be collected quickly, this will speed things up considerable. CRB checks are done so make sure you disclose everything as it will come up, anything missed off from your interview will require a follow visit to find out why you forgot to mention XXXXX

As others have suggested, there are other ways to achieve the same outcome, you could apply for a Sec. 4 (Children Act 1989) P/R Order which would give the new partner some legal rights. It all depends on what you are trying to achieve?

Scout

I don't know if this is still the case, but a friend of mine had twins, biological father not on the birth certificate and who never wanted to know them. She married and husband wanted to adopt the girls as he had been in their lives since they were babies and thought of them as his own. However, as the mother had married and now had a new surname, she was told she would have to adopt her own children as they had different names, as well as her husband adopting them. She thought this was preposterous and they didn't go through with the adoption process, although they took her husband's name and to all intents and purposes, were his children.

I may have got this completely wrong so I stand to be corrected, but maybe this is something to consider if you get married before the adoption comes through.

DigitalJedi

Scout wrote: »

However, as the mother had married and now had a new surname, she was told she would have to adopt her own children as they had different names, as well as her husband adopting them.

Sounds wrong to me. How can a mother adopt her own children? Regardless of name.

I think its worth pointing out here the difference between Parental Responsibility and adoption.

PR would give her new husband equal rights to have a say in the children's life, the same as the mother. The ex would still be liable for any CSA contributions etc. he may/may not be making.

However, adoption would cut all legal ties with the ex and in the eyes of the law, the child is no longer his. Therefore he is no longer liable for child maintenance. Its a point worth thinking about.

Plus I notice that the relationship hasn't exactly been a long one. Whilst I wish OP every success, its always worth considering the "what if" scenarios.