dd's lack of confidence due to me

hardpressed

I think the teacher has a bit of a cheek telling you what you should be doing, she should be encouraging your daughter to make friends with the other children in the class during school time. When your daughter 'clicks' with a particular child/children that's the time to ask them round to play, not forcing a child to make friends. Both my children chose their own friends, one was shy whilst the other was outgoing, but they both made friends in their own way and these friendship have lasted through to adulthood.
I was never one for mums and toddler groups or joining in the chat at the school gates. Don't worry about it, she will sort it out in her own time.