what would you do?

paradiddle_2

I think you're missing the point of my posting here now....

The ex-OH's mum suddenly brainwashed the ex-OH against me, and everything went to worms. No noise of trouble at all until then. Jealousy, bitterness and hate from the OH's Mum causes and fuels the trouble, and a weak willed daughter soaks it up without question.

For people like me in this situation, the current climate means the misery is here to stay until a buyer comes along. I guess that's the only answer. If the other side don't want you to have the house for petty reasons of jealousy, you can only sit and wait for that buyer. Meanwhile the agony continues.

bryanb

If you bought last autumn there can't be a lot of equity? I guess you are paying the mortgage? Have you considered stopping? I know what that would do to your credit rating, future mortgage prospects etc. But it could be heading that way anyway.
Sounds to me that the family killing themselves wouldn't be a great loss to society.

Merrywidow

Dear Squat now.....I LIKE YOUR STYLE, man after my own (female) heart. Surely one of us can come up with a solution. Sounds like we are all single minded in helping paradiddle - I will concentrate and be in touch later after I have conjured up my evil side. Had a mother-in-law once.....got lots of practice, there is an art to getting thru to those people and winning!!!

paradiddle_2

I put down a large chunk of money and jumped the traditional first few rungs of the ladder, so there's a large amount of equity, vastly in my favour.

Not paying the mortgage is a bad move, the solicitor advised; already asked! As is moving out. I'm resigned to the fact life is a misery until it sells.

Anyone else would just let themselves be bought out, and move on. But these people aren't making decisions based on logic; they are motivated my hate and bitterness because I'm a success (he says modestly!). Our house is larger than the ex-outlaws, and because I bought it as a FTB, I think that angle does come into it - they are that small minded.

Alan_M_2

bryanb wrote: »

Sounds to me that the family killing themselves wouldn't be a great loss to society.

There is sometimes a great deal of sense spoken in jest.

Buy her out, allow the in laws to do the deed, then posthumously nominate them for this years Darwin awards......rejoice that you found out their dear daughter was barking mad at this stage and not later in life a few a children down the road.

Nowt so queer as folk.....

Loretta

You have not been together very long, you only bought the house last autumn, you split up earlier this year, it is mainly in your name, what does mainly mean? she can't afford to buy you out so I presume that she has not been paying towards the house.

I am wondering why, if you are not married, you have to buy her out at all.

Tell us a bit more

paradiddle_2

We were together for 5 years without a -hint- of trouble. The MIL is behind all of the grief. The house is 70% in my name, mortgage between us (but vastly based on my numbers) Buying her out is one option to get shot of them fast - simple as that. She'd basically need 100K or more to buy me out and get a mortgage for herself. She doesn't earn a great deal, so she can't do that.

I'd rather sell, but in the meantime waiting for a buyer -now- is going to be a long game, and in living hell. Why can't people be easy!?

Brainache

paradiddle wrote: »

I can afford to buy her out, as its mainly in my name, but she can't afford to buy me out. Her family have told the ex-OH that if I buy the house, they'll kill themselves. SOOOOooo....!

The house has been on the market for two and a half months at top money (again, her choice and hence only two viewings) and I'm fighting to get it pushed down through my solicitor, so I can get rid of them. Need I say, the family, are a nightmare.

Here's a thought: What is the discrepency between 'top money' and a sensible market value? How about getting a mate/other 3rd party to 'buy' the house, then 'sell' it back to you? Would it be worth 30% of the 'difference' to get rid of her?

Plus, it might have the added bonus of group hari-kari for the outlaws when you waltz back into YOUR house :rotfl:

AMILLIONDOLLARS

You would have thought that her parents would be pleased that their daughter had done well for herself, I can't figure out some people!!

Sell the house, it will hold bad memories for you if you were to buy her out. You need a clean break all around. Save for a penthouse, that's will put the wind up the ex-in-Laws.

In the meantime you must establish some rules regarding your new living arrangements. I suggest you hold a meeting with her to discuss the does and and don'ts of sharing this house. Who pays for what, is she giving you money for gas, electric, towards the mortage ,I think you should ask for this because you'll still be liable to pay her her 30% share of the house when you sell, so why pay 100% of the mortgage. Who cleans what etc. Having people over to stay certainly warrants a discussion for both parties, especially if she's not paying toward her upkeep. I'd get the solicitor to outline this in the letter to her, stating that if she does not contribute at least 30% towards the upkeep, then she must not expect a full 30% on her investment.

That should get her thinking and may induce a reduction in price.

Good Luck
AMD

amcluesent

Oh dear, 1st rule of dating women - check out their mother for how she'll look in another 30 years!:eek: