Thread closed - ForDad

margaretclare

As a parting shot, at 2 in the morning, the person who posts as ForDad contributed:

you all think you know me well you dont. dont care what you think stuck up loosers.

Translation: You all think you know me well. You don't. (I) don't care what you think, stuck-up losers!

If this person ever comes back, may I point out that those of us who have given her good advice and factual information, are not the 'losers' here. Nor are we 'stuck-up'. We are people who have made, or are making, a success of our lives from our own efforts. We have spent time and trouble imparting details of our own lives in an effort to help.

We do not know this person 'well', but what we do know is what she has chosen to tell us: namely, that there is great resentment because she expects a legacy in spite of knowing that her father left nothing but debts behind him. She resents his fiancee owning the house they bought together, in spite of having been told that joint tenancy means 100% ownership by the survivor.

It is even possible that her English comprehension, as well as her proven inability to write, is so bad that she can't even understand most of what has been written, but that she has picked up a crumb here and there and chosen to put her own construction on it.

There are some people whom you encounter in this life that you cannot help, with the best will in the world. They live in their own unlovely construction of reality, and there is nothing that can be done for them. I have met a few in my time.

My sympathy goes out to the deceased father, who did his best to help his daughter, and to his bereaved fiancee, who deserves sympathy and respect.

Claire_Jones_3

Well said Margaretclare.

I'm so glad my husband and I work hard, try to live within our means to pay our taxes to support such low-lifes. Who then feel they have to right to try to get money from people's estates when they didn't have the time for them when they were alive. Even though that person looked after their child rather than the child going into care because they weren't capable to look after the child themselves. I'm sure we are also paying for a nice little council house for them, the house all maintained free of charge, free prescriptions, dental treatment etc

Oh but I bet she bleats on about how she struggles financially but she can afford a computer & internet, probably a few mobile phones as well.

emsywoo123

Do you still think this was a genuine poster? Heavens I must be naieve (?sp) but I really could not believe her.

Stephb1986_2

Well really we all know who the real loser is she couldn't keep her kids and wanted to sponge more off her dads girlfriend when she's entitled to nothing. Hopefully his girlfriend sticks to her guns and also passes on her dads debts and funeral costs then lets see who the biggest loser is.

Steph xx

Chollita

At least we can all construct a coherent sentence.

Felicity

I've just been reading it. It had to be a wind up, either that or a seriously disturbed individual.

churchrat

just read it:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:
why did the thread get closed??? and who decided to close it??
just curious

patchwork_cat

Much as I think either ForDad's post was a wind up or very badly put there is a very important point being missed.

My parents divorced when I was 7 and both remarried, my Dad twice. They are both dead and I have not got a clue as to the contents of my Dad's will, but assume that his wife inherited. I don't think about this much, but it doesn't seem right that when she dies I assume her daughters will inherit everything and myself, brother and sister will probably get nothing. My Dad was a Dr and as a result probably, left a fair amount.

My Mum has also died and she left all her money to her husband as is right, but he has since had another relationship, who has also since died, and I am sure that his subsequent partner's daughter will benefit when he dies as she is an executor of the will. Again that doesn't seem right that a woman my Mum never even met will in effect get some of her money, she was also a Dr and again there was fair amount of money.

I am a firm believer in surviving partners inheriting, but do feel that particualrly in step relationships there should be provision for children. It is difficult and do know that my husbands grandmother left the house to her husband in perpetuatity and felt that was harsh, but maybe in step relationships there needs to be more formalisation.

I am sure there will be some people who think that I am money grabbbing or an ambulance chaser, but that is far from the truth and have grieved my Mum immensly and miss her every day.

January20

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Much as I think either ForDad's post was a wind up or very badly put there is a very important point being missed.

My parents divorced when I was 7 and both remarried, my Dad twice. They are both dead and I have not got a clue as to the contents of my Dad's will, but assume that his wife inherited. I don't think about this much, but it doesn't seem right that when she dies I assume her daughters will inherit everything and myself, brother and sister will probably get nothing. My Dad was a Dr and as a result probably, left a fair amount.

My Mum has also died and she left all her money to her husband as is right, but he has since had another relationship, who has also since died, and I am sure that his subsequent partner's daughter will benefit when he dies as she is an executor of the will. Again that doesn't seem right that a woman my Mum never even met will in effect get some of her money, she was also a Dr and again there was fair amount of money.

I am a firm believer in surviving partners inheriting, but do feel that particualrly in step relationships there should be provision for children. It is difficult and do know that my husbands grandmother left the house to her husband in perpetuatity and felt that was harsh, but maybe in step relationships there needs to be more formalisation.

I am sure there will be some people who think that I am money grabbbing or an ambulance chaser, but that is far from the truth and have grieved my Mum immensly and miss her every day.

I don't think you are money grabbing or an ambulance chaser or a horrible person because you are making a lot of sense and I understand exactly what you mean.

However, the thread by ForDad made me think of two things at least:
1) the importance of wills - if either of your parents had included you in their will you would have inherited something wouldn't you?

2) the fact that so many people - like ForDad - seem to think that their parents' property is their own. Inheritance does not belong to you until the cheque has cleared in your account!

loftus

I don't disagree with the criticism that has been levelled against "ForDad" - from the information she posted it was valid.
Having said that I am glad the thread was locked because it was turning into a slap fest - with the same points being made again and again and I don't see the point of another thread being started to continue the with these comments.

Curv

patchwork_cat wrote: »

... but do feel that particualrly in step relationships there should be provision for children.

There is a vehicle for making provision for the children - it's a will. It's down to the person making the will to make provision for their own children by stipulating what or how much should be left to their children and under what circumstances. However, if they leave everything to their partner and nothing to their children, it's then down to the partner to decide if anything should go to their stepchildren.

The simple fact is, if you want to inherit, stay on good terms with your parents and urge them to take advice about making a will so that proper provision can be made at the right time, rather than relying on the goodwill of a step parent.