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Can you do OS and work full time too?
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I'd echo what everyone else has said. I doubt everyone does it all and if you work full time with a commute (same here) then you really cannot judge yourself against others that don't work.
For me routine is everything. If I take a day of from my routine, chaos erupts! I got out of the habit and am now working to get back into it. Find one that works for you. I like the flylady and home ec 101 principles of tackling a different room each day, but don't follow those routines. I try to be smarter with what I do. I clean the kitchen while dinner cooks and stop once that is ready. I clean the bathroom while the bath is running etc.0 -
you can't do it all unless you want to drink lots of coffee and have berrocca or proplus, redbull etc. Plenty of people I know do this, I really don't want to as I think I will become dependent on them and all those things scare me!
I'm knackered, tomorrow I will be out from 8am to at least 10pm. And I have bills to deal with asap. Personally I have no idea how people manage to take care of children, my flat is such a mess all the time. One of my neighbours has a cleaner and a childminder who even liases with the school so I can understand how she does it.
lots of people do have cleaners, housekeepers, ironing ladies and all kinds of help. If you can afford to get some help, 20 pounds once every two weeks for example for a cleaner. And that's London prices.
online grocery shopping, and perhaps one trip a week to a local greengrocers, butcher etc for fresh fruit and meat etc. Meal plan so you know you have the ingredients to hand and there is no stressing or worrying, have simple back up meal options incase some ingredients do run out.
I just bought this
http://www.johnlewis.com/231378165/Product.apex
rice cooker, slow cooker, halogen oven, make cooking simple with minimal mess to clear up and an easy way to batch cook. Make sure you have a good vacuum cleaner, helps a lot, the Henry ones are great. Declutter. Use stardrops for cleaning.
I think simplifying everything as much as possible helps, with paperwork if all your bills are set up and go out via direct debit then you only to review them once in a while if you are thinking of say, changing your electricity provider. Keep your financial products simple too.
have folders with dividers and labels so your bank statements, bills etc can go straight into the folders. Mine are on a bookcase but I've seen people with filing cabinets and its not on display that way.
let us know how you are getting on.0 -
I agree with what's being said...and sophlowe45 your set up could pretty well be me, especially regarding your food and kitchen situation, in my case the only other thing I do is try and avoid using the gas and electric as much as I can...entertainment is basic and to stay warm I go for duvets, blankets, fleeces, hot water bottles and more clothes(from charity shops)"A government afraid of its citizens is a Democracy. Citizens afraid of government is tyranny!" ~Thomas Jefferson
"Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in" ~ Alan Alda0 -
I can't crochet pickle.
I commute two hours into London and two hours back every day, am a local councillor, have an allotment, and am doing a part time PhD. It is literally impossible. So I've weighed up what's important to me, and the job has to go!
Seriously, I am planning to go freelance, but in the meantime, I have accepted that my allotment is kneehigh grass with slugs the size of spacehoppers. My flat is a permanent tip, and when I do find time to do things for myself, I grocery shop and batch cook because those are the things that I like the best. I literally can't see the bedroom floor for clothes at the moment (clean I should add) but I don't care. It's not important. Sitting down with a glass of wine in front of the telly is
It's all about priorities, and not being too hard on yourself. One day I'll have a perfect allotment and make all my own bread, forage for wild food, make my own booze and have a spotless flat. In the meantime, I'm doing okay, and that will have to doGrocery challenge September 2022: £230.04/£200
Grocery challenge October 2022: 0/£200
2012 numbers:
Grocery challenge - April £65.28/£80
Entertainment - £79
Grocery challenge March £106.55/£100
Grocery challenge February £90.11/£100
Grocery challenge January £84.65/£3000 -
When I worked full time before having family many yrs ago I would spend most of my weekend cleaning through the whole house - and we never had visitors.
Now family grown and through ill health cannot get out and wish I hadn't wasted those days on cleaning!Great opportunities to help others seldom come, but small ones surround us every day. -- Sally Koch0 -
:DHi there,
don't be knocking yourself out for a bit of dust, life is far too short its for living not measuring yourself up to other people
I am,retired (Huh;)) and live alone as I am widowed .Now you would think that my house was perfect with not a thing out of place ,well believe me its not .I look after my four grandsons both before and after school as their parents work full time to keep a roof over their heads.I probably do more housework at DDs than I do in my own house.Mine gets done at weekends and when DD has a day off and then so do I.But if, as last week, the sun was shining, and the sky was blue, there was no way I was going to slave over a hot hoover or duster I went out to the local country park and had a stroll(not a very fast one as I have a mobility problem and have to use my stick to get around) the river was beautiful and the birds were singing what could be nicer .
OK so my t.v. had a layer of dust on it ,so what its my TV, and my dust:rotfl: when its cold and rainy and miserable outside then my house gets more of a spruce up.
I batch bake and freeze as I always have done it for years and see no point in cooking just one meal when with a little more effort I can cook several and have two or three in the freezer for those days when I either can't be bothered or would rather play with my grandsons.I am a hands-on Granny and the boys enjoy having a Gran who doesn't moan about the mess when their painting, or if we are playing a game thats what we do. Blow the housework it can wait, if my eight year old grandson wants to play Jenga then thats what we do.
After I pick the boys up from school I take them to their house and its homework time whilst I make them a snack, then for an hour or so ,especially if its raining we do whatever they want to play with.at 5.45p.m. its clear-it-up time as Mum and Dad come home between 6.30 and 7 and by the time they do the meal is preppped and the table set and I go home to make my own dinner .
I also go to a knitting club(this morning after the school run) and a Book club and on Fridays a History club I enjoy all these things as life is for enjoying.My week is a busy one and I am never bored as I just don't have time to be,Be kind to yourself and do things that YOU want to do and not because you think everyone else lives a perfect life .We honestly don't, I have a list of to-do jobs as long as your arm,:D and have had for well over 50 years ,some get done, some don't, but eventually things get done when I feel like doing them .I no longer garden or grow things as my joints won't let me but one of my grandsons will cut the grass for me in exchange for a decent bacon buttie:rotfl:My windows I pay a young man to clean once a month
As for the rest it gets done when I feel like it .I try to shop around once a week as I'm not keen on shopping for the sake of it and would rather read a book than go around the shops.
As I said my cooking is done in batches and Sunday morning is when I bake the cakes for the week (and my grandsons )Whilst listening to the Archers on the wireless (I like to multi task:)I peel spuds once a week as well, and they are in water, in the fridge, to be used as and when needed.Just change the water every couple of days.Most of my veg I freeze and as for paperwork well thats what a computer is for all bills and banking can be done fairly quickly via ones computer.So kick back relax and realise that there's probably lots of ladies locally who think YOU are the mracle superwoman going to work and running a house .Folk aren't always what they seem to outsiders you know.
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I live the idea of crocheting pickle
I don't work as I'm currently caring for my DH, I can be up 3/6 times a night with him and then the morning routine with getting him showered and dressed is now down to a fine art, I feel like I've done a days work before I've even had my first cup of tea. The house is clean (to my standards), it's tidy (to my standards) and the paperwork is up to date (by my standards). I do at least one load of washing a day (I put it in after tea and set the timer for the morning so it finishes as I come down the stairs and it's straight on the line/airer.
My standards have had to adjust according to my available time. I think that's where most people go wrong.
My crocheting, sewing, jam/pickle making, home brewing etc are my hobbies so I get to do them when I've done everything else that needs doing. I don't do them instead of cleaning, cooking and keeping on top of the washing. They are my treat. Some evenings I'm so shattered that by 8pm I'm back in bed and I'll have done nothing more than get through the day."Start every day off with a smile and get it over with" - W. C. Field.0 -
Think of it from another direction - what can you get away with? My OH works away during the week, I work irregular hours and I'm in the process of setting up my own business. I tidy up every day - not obsessively, but I like to have things put away. That way, if I do get the urge to hoover, it's much easier. I hoover and dust when it really needs it, or if Mother is coming to visit. I keep the kitchen clean, and wash clothes (appx 4 loads a week). I cook meals from scratch, mostly, but I refuse to feel guilty if I have a carry out or a tin of beans. On a nice day I'll cut the grass (I've cut it three times this year...), and I use the local car wash for the cars. £5.00 well spent. I don't make bread, I don't knit, I don't pickle, and I don't feel guilty. I did make some jam earlier in the year, but only because we had a glut of rhubarb and I don't like waste.
Are you getting treatment for your depression? I think that's your most pressing issue - and nothing feeds depression more than a feeling of guilt. When my OH was going through one of his worst episodes (unable to get out of bed but then feeling unbelievably guilty that he wasn't doing anything), we found that doing 'one big thing a day' worked well. I told him what I needed him to do, and that was all he had to do - to begin with it was just 'have a shower and get dressed', but progressed to 'clean the windows outside', or 'cook tea'. And he found that, having done his 'one big job' he often felt able to do a bit more, knowing that if he didn't, he didn't have to feel guilty about it.No longer a spouse, or trailing, but MSE won't allow me to change my username...0 -
You know, sometimes trying to do it all can be very depleting. I used to juggle, and laugh when people asked me stuff and think 'ask a busy person'. As an example, i did my a levels in one year, then went to university full time, got a job, condensed my four year degree into three years and started a business..one night a week after this period of time there was no time in my schedule for me to go to bed on mondays, just no time! i competed in a couple of sports and would prioritise that over say...mundane thigs like eating or drinking, yet socialised heavily every friday, saturday and a few othernights a week too.
Fast forward a few years and i got ill. I remember around that time i was running up a hill one day and the hill just seemed to get bigger and bigger and my legs got woolier and woolier and i wondered what was wrong with me. By the end of that year i was unable to communicate, had been in a coma and had to relearn things like walking and talking.
Honestly? I will always want to do it all. Practically, it ain't gonna happen, nor am i going to try again. If you run yourself at a high percentage efficiency all the time the chances are you are not fueling or resting enough to sustain it and your health.
This weekend my husband and i had planned to attack our wardrobes and sort out, but instead we had a snuggly evening and morning in bed. You know what....i reckon the time spent with each other is at least as importnant for health, and more important for our relationship in the long term. Sometimes having it all means you are missing out on the really important things.0 -
A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men :cool:
Norn Iron club member #3800
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