May - living on fresh air challenge...

Frith

NSD today!

The weight is shifting in that 1 pair of trousers will now come off without undoing the zip! I think not eating probably isn't the healthiest way to lose weight, though.

Anyway, must do some housework before the school run. Think it'll be pasta and passata for tea.

I've been having a lot of dreams recently (well, I always do but now 3 a night or more) and they're mainly about the "good old days" which for me were between 1991 and 1997. (Met the ex in 1998 which seems to be the cut off point for happy times!!) Lovely dreams but then I wake up feeling just awful that those times are long gone and yesterday that horrible feeling of melancholy lasted all day :-(

Anyway, no letters from my bank except a statement to say my £30 charge will be taken out of my account in 28 days. Nothing from the mortgage company. Might write to the MP about not getting any CSA for 5 months.

Liz

RAS

ACEY wrote: »

NSD today!

The weight is shifting in that 1 pair of trousers will now come off without undoing the zip! I think not eating probably isn't the healthiest way to lose weight, though.

Anyway, must do some housework before the school run. Think it'll be pasta and passata for tea.

ACEY

You must eat. Write down exactly what you are eating here please. Your boys need you to stay well and if you do not eat it, you could get ill.

ACEY wrote: »

I've been having a lot of dreams recently (well, I always do but now 3 a night or more) and they're mainly about the "good old days" which for me were between 1991 and 1997. (Met the ex in 1998 which seems to be the cut off point for happy times!!) Lovely dreams but then I wake up feeling just awful that those times are long gone and yesterday that horrible feeling of melancholy lasted all day :-(

Have you ever heard of NLP (Neuro-Linguisitc Programming)? When I first tried to deal with the [EMAIL="!!!!"]!!!![/EMAIL], I started reading some books and played with it. What I did is not exactly standard but it made a huge difference to my life.

If you read these self-help books they all suggest that you remember a time when you were really good at something/happy etc. Only I could not find these "resourceful" memories because if I went back past a certain date, I could trip over something unpleasant and I did not want to go there.

What I did was to write down a list of one good thing that happened for each year and then set them out in order, with the oldest memory furthest away. I imagined flying over the memories to the beginning, then dropped down into the first one and came back to the present through each memory.

I had previously described my memories as being stored in a vey grubby filing cabinet, too dirty to touch, with no file tags, so I had no way of knowing whether the content was going to be good or bad. After this little exercise, I had a gleaming filing cabinet and when I opened the first drawer, there were all these files with little red tags that indicated that they had happy memories in them. It is amazing how psycho-active this sort of thing is. It made a real difference to my ability to talk to people about my past.

Since your "unhappy" times cover many of the early years of your boys, you may want to do something like this. The only caution is that you need to be careful about remembering too many happy times with the ex (there must have been some).

Can post you the details of the books if you want to read more.

Frith

This week I have been mostly eating...

Monday
breakfast - porridge
lunch - tuna sandwich
tea - scones

Tuesday
breakfast - nothing
lunch - Marmite on toast
tea - 2 crumpets

Wednesday
breakfast - nothing
lunch - toast (can't remember)
tea - sausages, beans, potato recipe

Thursday
breakfast - nothing
lunch - porridge
tea - will be pasta

invasion by son, more later

RAS

Acey

This is not enough to keep you well and there is a hell of a lot of carbs which will be sending your blood sugar levels up before the insulin kicks in.

What is in the freezer?

Frith

Oh dear, its looking a bit carbohydrate laden for tea!

Will be pasta and sauce and I've got a rice pudding cooking. Might throw a few apricots in the rice pud in a minute.

Re: your previous post. Strangely, I have been literally "filing" as I've been through all the paperwork and photographs in recent months. And I've kept a diary for 20 years.

I am always a bit wary about doing anything psychological to myself as I don't know what technique my psychologist used on me (CBT, probably) and I am a bit worried about tinkering! I seem to be OK as long as I don't do too much, nothing out of the ordinary happens, I don't drink, watch violent films etc. And I keep taking the tablets!

Heard from one of the other mothers at school that the ex has been outside (school) examing my car, peering through the windows etc. She thinks he was trying to read the milometer.

Sorry for the disjointed post, big son has been talking to me non-stop about football and I must give the rice a stir!

Liz.

P.S Harking back to the "no fun since 1997" thing I have been thinking recently that I have barely made any new friends since then. I have the ones from school/Uni that I always had, wasn't allowed to socialise for 6+ years and not only find it difficult now but don't really want any more friends. I always say I am happy with the ones I've got but that's seeming a bit like an excuse.

Frith

Tomorrow's tea will be home made pizza.
Saturdays will be vegetable pies etc.
Sundays might be chicken, stuffing etc.

RAS

I understand where you are coming from. I have to say that what I did was more powerful than I expected, albeit brilliant. But if NLP is ever an option, then consider it.

Re the diet, i can see that you are doing what my mum did which is why I am nervous. She used to make sure we ate as well as possible, but go without herself and it worried me Sh1tless even as a 10 year old. I knew that if hse went under we would have to live with our father and I was terrified of that happening.

Have you ever seen jocasta Innes "pauper's cookbook" - that ages me rather?

She does what she calls planned cooking. Instead of using the oven for one dish, she stacks up several, a casserole, a pie, fruit crumble and some baked potatoes say, so she uses less energy. One of my staples in those days was a sort of spanish omelette made from clod baked potato, any vegs going and and egg or two.

it really is important that you increase your food intake and in particular your protein and veg/fruit intake. Which is where the freeezer request came from.

emka_2

Hi,
Just thought I'd enter the conversation, as I have shown by my other e-mails I am on the verge of converting to the beginning of being a dfw, but even though my bank manager is a devious !!!!! and out for all she can take me for; she did impart one piece of good advice. To separate the bill account and the money left over will go into an expenditure account. Good luck I know just how you feel

Alisonbel

Hi have just read your thread, Do you not get free school meals? I also have been living on fresh air this month but now the freezer is empty, thank god its pay day tomorrow. Good Luck! xx

RAS

ACEY wrote: »

Tomorrow's tea will be home made pizza.
Saturdays will be vegetable pies etc.
Sundays might be chicken, stuffing etc.

So bang it all in the oven tomorrow night and then you do not need to cook much for a couple of days.