8 year old with fears - suggestions on dealing with?

bestpud

Is it a subject which can be put across in a different way perhaps?

I wonder if it is worth talking to her teacher and asking if she can just be aware of the problems your dd is having with this topic? Let her know you want dd to learn about it and ask if they have any suggestions for minimising her distress.

They have a duty to consider the needs of every child and a good teacher may well be able to work around it. It all depends on the topic and the particular issues you dd has with it, I know, but it can't do any harm, to ask can it?

Sorry if it's a rubbish suggestion - it's what I would do, but I don't have a child with ADD, and it may not apply the same.

Sarahsaver

OP maybe there is a different way your dd can do the project?
My DS could talk the hind legs off a whole field of donkeys, draw beautiful pictures and make models, so that is my plan for when he is older and has to do projects. He isnt what i would say confident more that he doesnt notice how other people react. so for a project he would prepare a talk and illustrate it with pictures for display on the projector, and maybe produce models.

hate to use this phrase but 'think outside the box' LOL

aliasojo

Dont think there's much that could be done differently tbh. We call these types of lessons 'projects' here, but I'm wondering if maybe they would just be classed as subject lessons elsewhere?

There's not really anything the kids do as such. It's more that they learn about a particular topic by watching video and completing work sheets etc. The subject matter is quite serious and there really isn't any way of circumventing this other than missing the topic completely which I would prefer didn't happen as I feel it's good for my daughter to learn about important world issues.

I'm going to have a word with her teacher later on and see if she can suggest anything to help the situation and I've already been up in the loft and dug out a brand new but very cheap stereo I got from one of the bargain threads in Grabbit about 2 years ago and never had a use for up until now, lol.

It's difficult to balance important (imo) learning against peace of mind which what this situation seems to boil down to.

Why, oh why does each newborn baby not come with it's own user manual? :rolleyes: :rotfl:

Sarahsaver

Oh I see. The video/worksheets thing sounds like a bit of a cop out on the part of the teacher and maybe your DD needs something more involved. My DS cant stand things which are 'open ended' he likes rules rules rules and wants to know the correct procedure for everything.

aliasojo

Im not sure I'm being clear enough maybe? It's not something that could be done differently or by lesser or more involvement.

Imagine you were doing a project about babies for instance and you were being taught stages of development and then shown a sheet with a picture of a fully formed baby and asked to say what stage of development this baby was at. You couldn't do that without at one point seeing a picture of a baby and being told what 'age' it was.

Now, imagine you had a phobia about seeing pictures of a baby. You're pretty much stuffed, right?

It's a simple as that really, but doesn't involve babies, lol.

Sarahsaver

yep i do understand what you mean;)

newbienortherner

Your daughter sounds a bit like me at that age. I didn't have ADD but was incredibly sensitive and very much a worrier (used to wake my parents up at night worried that they would die!)

I reacted badly to a number of 'projects' at school particularly history modules focusing on violence or human suffering. Have to admit that I still can't watch films where people are violent to one another and I'm 29! (I drive my hubbie mad as we can never get a DVD that 's more than a 12 cert!)

I haven't got any magic solutions for you other than to make her feel as secure as possible and give lots of cuddles when she gets upset. As she gets older the subjects she deals with a school will be more challenging and it may be worth chatting to new teachers she gets and giving them a 'heads up' that she may get more upset than her peers.

julesangles

see i had forgot all about the dreaded project thing till you said. how i wiped that from my mind i will never know.
my child was doing about the environment, went to the recycling center to start that was OK. they then showed him trees being felled, thats when the problem started. we couldn't walk pass a twig without him kicking off, the nightmares were very bad at the time. then the worse thing happened. there was a bad gale and it blew 2 of the trees down in the school yard. i live 6 miles away and i swear i heard it him go off from here.
he still hates tree that are cut this does include Christmas trees. walks up to people tells that how cutting there Christmas tree down has killed a part of the earth and how they have killed a piece of him.:A which makes shopping in garden centers at Christmas a big no no. it was 6 years ago and i do tend to block the worst moments out.

Paparika

aliasojo wrote: »

The project matter I feel is largely irrelevent to the question which is why I wasn't specific. Also, we live in a very small place and might be more easily identified if I gave more exact detail.

ok sorry wasn't being nosy, i thought that perhaps the subjet of the project may be the cause.

aliasojo wrote: »

Im not sure I'm being clear enough maybe? It's not something that could be done differently or by lesser or more involvement.

Imagine you were doing a project about babies for instance and you were being taught stages of development and then shown a sheet with a picture of a fully formed baby and asked to say what stage of development this baby was at. You couldn't do that without at one point seeing a picture of a baby and being told what 'age' it was.

Now, imagine you had a phobia about seeing pictures of a baby. You're pretty much stuffed, right?

It's a simple as that really, but doesn't involve babies, lol.

ahh i see, then yes go talk to the teacher and explain the concerns you have, the school shouldn't kick up a fuss, you don't want to force your daughter to do this if she is going to be very upset about it, your a good mum, and you work with the school over her ADD, communication with the school would be a first point. Good luck

aliasojo

Honestly no need to be sorry, understandable you asked.