Hubby is Spendaholic - Help Please!!!!

REDMADCURLS

Hi

We have just managed to sort out our finances and get debt free (mainly due to a planned remortgage which was always the plan when we bought house 2 years ago - this allowed much needed work done to house and debt cleared (not what Martin recommends I know but anyways)

Yesterday I decided to go thru bank accounts and see just what our money goes on!
OMG I knew my hubby could spend but I was shocked. Our DDMS and Mortgage cost £2000 almost - so far this month £5000 spent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sat hubby down - showed him eg £160 on Lottery is excessive. He spent £140 in Maplins (Techie store) and £119 in Halfords and cant remember what he bought!!

Thought I got thru to him - today he went to Tesco to get bread and spent £60!!!!
So now realizing our 'chat' last night didnt work

How can I curb his spending without acting like a battleaxe?

Ta
RMC

PS He is self employed and gets most of his money in cash!!!!!!!!

Bunnyinthelights

Spending diary?
Take his money/card away and give him a set amount?
Chain him to the sink and make him do the dishes all day?

REDMADCURLS

Unfortunately he collects mostly cash from his business so often damage is done before he gets home!!!!!!!!!
Started the spending diary on excel yesterday - did March and April from bank accounts - thats when I got the shock of my life!
But off he goes to Tesco and buys the bread we needed, along with compost, a toaster (the other wasnt great but hey it still toasted on one side) and a toy for the cat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What am I going to do with him????????

RMC

headoutthesand

sell him to the highest bidder :L

REDMADCURLS

headoutthesand wrote: »

sell him to the highest bidder :L

Imagine: For Sale to good home, kind man who will cook (not clean just cook), make you laugh, be loyal, buy you, him, the cat, anyone he knows, people he doesnt know but hey it was a bargain gifts regularly.
One problem - he doesnt worry about having the money to pay for these little extras!!

No Reserve!

Tustastic

REDMADCURLS wrote: »

Imagine: For Sale to good home, kind man who will cook (not clean just cook), make you laugh, be loyal, buy you, him, the cat, anyone he knows, people he doesnt know but hey it was a bargain gifts regularly.
One problem - he doesnt worry about having the money to pay for these little extras!!

No Reserve!

I suggest you set him up an eBay account so that, every day, when he gets back from work, you can eBay everything he's just bought!

Merlot

Cor blimey, you need to chat to him again, you are going to need another remortgage at this rate if he continues, especially as we may be going into a recession SE people should be very wary just now.

Chat to him again and if that doesn't work, get him to sort out the finances and don't touch them at all, it worked for me and my OH who used to spend money as though it grew on trees, but no longer, I give him an allowance each month and thats all he gets, he did the finances for 2 months and had loads of sleepless nights, he is completely useless at working out the finances but quite good at earning the money, so I do the finances now, he knows we live on a tight budget but we no longer have any debt.

My only advice to you really, do not remortgage again, turning unsecured debt into secured debt can be dangerous, you could lose your home if you cannot keep up repayments.

Merlot.x.

REDMADCURLS

Merlot - thankfully I earn more than enough to cover this mortgage - I have just graduated last summer and so that was the plan all along - get job - remortgage - so that is covered - but it was a ONE off - now trying to explain to him that we need to pay extra to get years down!

Tustastic - another place he likes to shop - Ebay - I am selling all my chatels and he is buying - using the funds in the Paypal account - knocked that one on the head today too - threatened to change password if he uses it again!! But yes will tell him thats what I am going to do if he brings home more crap!

Would love to hand finances over to him - but God only knows where we would end up - he doesnt like to think about money (obviously)When I told him yesterday that we had spent almost £5k this month, he looked at it and said 'well no point in talking about that since it is already spent" but will spend nothing for rest of month
and then went to Tesco today and spent £60 - !!!!!!!!

RMC

jak

Take away his cards. Give him a set amount each week and tell him you will leave him if this continues!
That's what I did!

REDMADCURLS

jak wrote: »

Take away his cards. Give him a set amount each week and tell him you will leave him if this continues!
That's what I did!

Has no cards already!! Self employed and gets mostly cash! Thats the problem - He spends before he gets home - GGGGRRRRRRRRRRRR

tallyhoh

You should try reading some of my posts about my OH. You need to nip this in the bud & NOW.
Start as you mean to go on, dont worry about sounding like a battle axe, you need to keep a roof over your head.

Keep on & on & on. Dont bail him out & if he spends and leaves the housekeeping short--well give him tinned spaghetti (Ughhh) or value beans everynight till he's sick.

Please dont try & be noble like I did & manage very well on little money, DONT manage, keep on that you have no money & he needs to take care of it, give him value loo roll & tell him thats all you can afford.

And whatever you do (people wont like me saying this) keep a secret stash of money hidden away that he knows nothing about. You may need it.