Help in ideas for a funeral tea

moanymoany

It finally happened, my poor old mum died. I am now doing all the registering and organising. I must have made 20 phone calls this morning!

My stepdad has decided he wants a funeral tea after the funeral. I have decided not to make cakes or quiches, but I would like some ideas of what to serve.

I thought ham and wholegrain mustard, tuna mayonnaise and egg and cress sandwiches. I could buy quiche to cut up but I would like to do some other bits savoury and sweet.

All ideas will be gratefully received.

ps - easy things would be appreciated. I can't think at the moment.

Fi27

My sympathies to you and your family.

Unfortunately we were at a funeral on saturday. They had a tea after the service which was a nice way for everyone to get together. They had thin slices of crusty bread with slivers of ham and chopped tomato & herbs (bit like a brushetta) small bite sized crackers with sliced cheese & pickle or cheese & cucumber, bite sized oat cakes with pate and cranberry jelly (i think) and the usual sausage rolls. Then short bread wedges and tiny chocolate eclairs.

Hope this helps.

Take it easy and try to delegate some tasks if you can

Fi

lumpy_bum

im sorry to hear of your loss xx

maybe something she would have liked? maybe a victoria sponge or fruit cake or similar to have with tea after some sandwiches?
when my grandad passed away we had outside caterers come in, not money saving but none of us were really up to it to be honest.

scuzz

Firstly, I'm so sorry for your loss.

I used to work at a hotel and part of my job was to help people plan wakes.

If you're going to make sandwiches, don't make one for everyone. Chances are, not many people will eat four quarters.

Chicken drumsticks were always popular
Vegetable crudities - carrot sticks, cucumber, celery - with dips
Cheese & pineapple sticks
A cold meat platter - ham, chicken breast, luncheon meat (cheap)
pork pies cut into quarters
bowls of crisps/nibbles such as nuts


Sweet wise:
Jam tarts
Mini swiss rolls

Most people won't be looking for a feast, so don't panic about it.

To give you an idea, the prices where I worked used to start at £6 per head, but I'm sure you can do it cheaper

I hope everything goes ok

Olliebeak

So sorry to hear about your mum - but I'm sure that your stepdad will be extremely grateful for your help with the catering arrangements.

I'm assuming that these things are to eat casually, possibly while standing up and chatting. Could be slightly different if a 'sit-down do'.

Quiche is a good idea; scotch eggs cut into quarters (or little picnic eggs); large bowl of pasta salad (but would need spoons/forks for eating it); cheese and crackers; sausage rolls; salmon on finger rolls (or barm cakes halved across and then cut into halves again and left open with cucumber on top. Don't forget the serviettes - soft paper ones can come in handy when anybody gets upset!

How about some of those caramel shortcake slices (cut into smaller pieces if necessary); halved scones (cherry, fruit or plain) spread with butter and some with jam as well; some nice chocolate biscuits; some shortbread; buttered malt loaf; some people may appreciate plain digestives - good ones though.

Try and borrow a couple of teapots (AND an extra kettle) - one is never enough - if you can - or the kitchen worktop will be full of tea-bags by the end of the day. Couple of sugar bowls (or glass bowls that you put fruit cocktail in) saves keep asking 'how many sugars'!

Make sure that all the food is ready, wrapped in clingfilm and in the fridge before going to the funeral. One of the worst things for food poisoning is 'buffet-style food' left out for too long at room temperature. The sweet stuff wouldn't be too bad but the sandwiches, quiches, sausage rolls etc should be refrigerated for health & safety guidelines. Basically if it's in a chill cabinet when you buy it - then it should be chilled right up until the moment of eating.

Hope it all goes well for your family's (and mum's) sake - it can be a stressfull time for everybody.

Ollie

mary43

moanymoany - so sorry to hear about your mum and thinking of you.

As for funeral teas............think most ideas are already on this thread. When my Dad died we had a mixture of sandwiches, quiche, sausage rolls, and cake............a lot got left but it was all stuff we could eat the next day anyway so nothing was wasted.

Best wishes to you

dorry_2

moanymoany--

I am sorry to hear about your mum. x

If you wanted some different ideas for wake food, Nigella's Feast Book has a really good section for funeral food at the back of it. Nigella talks about when she lost her mum and how cooking helped her through a very difficult time. she says that in the act of preparing food and cooking it, you loose yourself in the task and this somehow helps. The act of cooking can be very calming and consuming.

last week I made one of her suggestions, Nursery fish Pie and it was really easy to make and tasted great. Nigella made this the night after the her mums funeral

Other suggestions made by nigella are lentil soup, meatloaf and hamine eggs, marble cake and fruit tea loaf.

hth

Bogof_Babe

Just wanted to add my condolences. It's horrible losing a parent, and you won't be thinking straight for the first few days. Whatever you decide, keep it simple and accept any help offered. Perhaps some of the mourners would bring trays of sandwiches or sausage rolls, or a cake. That's what we did for my OH's father's funeral. For my own dad's, we booked a table at a local Beefeater as there weren't many mourners expected, and paid for everyone's meal.

morganlefay

My very old Mum died last year and I feel for you. We had sandwiches (egg, cheese, tuna, ham, rare beef with mustard) and some asparagus ones which were horrible, all soggy. I'd go for easy-to-eat things like nicely well-filled sarnies - cut very small. But we found that there were a lot of sausages etc left over. I'm not sure people wanted to eat greasy things when they were all in their best clothes - LOTS of napkins necessary. We did tea and wine - red and white. I could have drunk a bucket of tea, but lots of people were on the wine and enjoyed it - it cheered people up and got them chatting so they reminisced about Ma, which was nice. Then there was cake - one or two sorts, a fruit one and a lemony one. We got some really nice photos of Ma in younger, happier days which we put round the room, and that felt nice.
To be honest I wouldn't beat yourself up worrying about it. Simple and tasty is what's needed - they didn't come for the food, did they / They came to support you and the family. Nice food is an extra ! I hope it goes well for you, Morgan

Discount-Diva_3

Sorry for your loss

The best thing we did at my Dad's funeral was to hire a urn to boil up the water, surprising how many cups of tea were consumed. I also had a couple of friends who didn't attend the funeral come and make the tea, that was a huge help

We did run out of sandwiches so make sure you have a spare loaf or 2 and a couple of packets of ham or something just in case

HTH

rockie4

Sorry to hear about your Mum.
I lost my Mum a while ago, I'm an only child so had to do everything myself so I ordered a couple of trays of sandwiches from M&S - not OS I know but it cost me less in the long run I'm sure. I did make a couple of cakes - traybakes and a fruit cake and sliced them up.

There's so much to be done at this time that I think it's important to look after yourself and if that means cutting a few corners then so be it.