This is the funniest thing I ever saw on ebay, its not hosted any more as it was on last year but I have saved the text of the description and pasted it below for your enjoyment:
"Let's face it, some of you out there are either extremely ugly or have absolutely no social skills whatsoever. I know it's harsh, indeed, it's a harsh world, but the truth needs telling.
Are you fed up having no mates? Just wish you had someone to talk to?
Well, NOW'S YOUR CHANCE!
This auctions gives you the chance to have a mate for a week. Find out what you've been missing out on all your life. I will phone you every day for half an hour and will talk about anything you want. Got problems?
I'll fix 'em! Need a shoulder to cry on? I'm there for you!
After a week of having a mate you'll be a new person, you'll have the confidence to get out there talking to new people. Within a year you'll be happily married, settled down and be planning your first child.
This auction is only for one weeks worth of having a mate, don't think i'll be in contact after because I won't. I've got my own life. Want to try and stalk me after? I'll have you tracked down and beaten, so don't even go there.
So, what are you waiting for, I'm the mate you've always wanted, and after a week you'll have to just pull yourself together, mourn your loss and crack on with your life.
I'm no counsellor but will give you free counselling, I'll take you places (in your head) that you've never been.
This is what you've always needed in life, so get bidding.
This is a genuine auction, winning bidding will be expected to pay."
Replies
You've gotta laugh
Make sure you have your speakers on
http://www.erikasfriends.com/for_net/lj/song_for_you.htm
;D
"Let's face it, some of you out there are either extremely ugly or have absolutely no social skills whatsoever. I know it's harsh, indeed, it's a harsh world, but the truth needs telling.
Are you fed up having no mates? Just wish you had someone to talk to?
Well, NOW'S YOUR CHANCE!
This auctions gives you the chance to have a mate for a week. Find out what you've been missing out on all your life. I will phone you every day for half an hour and will talk about anything you want. Got problems?
I'll fix 'em! Need a shoulder to cry on? I'm there for you!
After a week of having a mate you'll be a new person, you'll have the confidence to get out there talking to new people. Within a year you'll be happily married, settled down and be planning your first child.
This auction is only for one weeks worth of having a mate, don't think i'll be in contact after because I won't. I've got my own life. Want to try and stalk me after? I'll have you tracked down and beaten, so don't even go there.
So, what are you waiting for, I'm the mate you've always wanted, and after a week you'll have to just pull yourself together, mourn your loss and crack on with your life.
I'm no counsellor but will give you free counselling, I'll take you places (in your head) that you've never been.
This is what you've always needed in life, so get bidding.
This is a genuine auction, winning bidding will be expected to pay."
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=324&item=5510233662&rd=1
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=5510651173&ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1469&item=5510688728&rd=1
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=11451&item=3495763356&rd=1
Put all these links on my watch lilst...still no bids on the twix (awwwwwwwwwwww) or pongy trainers (yuk) but the headlice are going!