What makes a successful DFW?

moanymoany

I find the attitude of DFW's fascinating. There are those who once they've had their LBM really go for it, take the good advice offered, cut back to the 'real' basics, take up the challenges and we see the totals of debt at the bottom of their posts steadily fall.

At the other end of the scale there are those who don't want to make the huge sacrifices it takes to scale their spending down to below their means to free up the money they need to pay their debts and over the months their debts move down painfully slowly. Theirs are the posts full of excuses!

I would like to know how DFW's get over the hurdle of scaling down their 'can't live withouts' to make sure they pay as much as they can off of their debts each month. What keeps them motivated to live a frugal life, have second jobs and often change the way their families live?

What advice would you give to get - and stay - on track.

always_amazed

For me, what keeps me motivated is remembering I don't want to pay a PENNY more into those fatcat's pockets than I have to.
Once I'm out of my 'bad debt' and have learnt to manage money, I can make MY money work for ME; not for someone else (as it does currently ho hum).

I can't really remember how I scaled everything down... maybe I didn't do it properly!! I had a lot going on at the time so maybe that's why I didn't notice.

p.s. i might go to bed now, it's very late indeed.

Bayblue

I think for me it's that I just really really want that extra 400- 500 odd quid that goes into debt busting at the moment in my pocket or bank account. It will be like having a massive pay rise, I won't know what to do with it all! Also, I'm not getting any younger and frankly I don't want to live in debt in middle and older age, I'd like to be able to enjoy life a bit without worrying so much. I'll never be a high earner but I've made my lifestyle poorer than it could have been than if I hadn't given myself this problem.

My strengths as a DFW is that I'm not that bothered by shopping and buying new stuff (most of my debts were racked up just by general living expenses and bad money management) and I love bargain hunting. My weakness has been that I have a habit of taking my eye off the ball, I get a bit lazy don't keep checks on things meaining that the debts have refused to budge. Hopefully, that's all in the past now though because I do think that, thanks to this place mainly, I actually understand more about how I got myself into debt in the first instance and I have learnt the ways to get myself out of it.

TurnaroundSue

I know what you mean about taking your eye off the ball BB. I look at my accounts every day and do the odd little transfer here and there to my savings account. It wasn't until I joined this site that I learnt how to manage my money properly and I think it is only in the last 6 months that I have finally got to grips with it - although I am still cr*p at managing my food budget :eek: and have a long way to go before I will be able to get hold of that one properly.

The thing that keeps me going is looking at my savings accounts and seeing them increase month on month and also paying for things from the savings account instead of a credit card - that is a great feeling:D . I have £3300 to pay off by August and then I will be completely debt free (except for my mortgage, but then am going to work on that). So for the next 5 months, I have to pay off £660 (approx) per month as that's when my 0% runs out and I AM NOT going to do another transfer switch and pay another blo*dy fee:mad: - so I am going to cut back to the bone, only spend on necessary items and focus on paying my final bit of debt off.

payingfornowt

Excellent thread!

I am fairly new to being a DFW.

I like parts, wearing a coat in the house, baths are not allowed, NSD’s, ebaying. Not being afraid to say “I cant afford it” when offered holidays / nights out etc.

But….

I may fall into the second category somewhat, I still like a day out now and then and a glass of wine each evening.

The good news is since posting and reading on here I know what I can spend and I also know that for every pound I spend instead of paying debts the banks will get about 12p from me which certainly makes me think.

My net worth is heading in the right direction. It’s a start but I know I can do better.

My next plan is to stop rounding figures such as… saving £150 this month because I couldn’t afford to save £200, I should have put £163.72 in really. If that makes any sense.

moanymoany

always_amazed wrote: »

I can't really remember how I scaled everything down... maybe I didn't do it properly!! I had a lot going on at the time so maybe that's why I didn't notice.

p.s. i might go to bed now, it's very late indeed.

I don't think there can be a 'wrong' way to scale down always.

I understand what everyone means by looking forward to keeping you whole wage for yourself. Years ago I was in Seattle - one and only time in US - and there was a programme on debt. It was the first time I'd ever realised the huge problem there is. They used a kind of 'Snowball' system of payment so the amount stayed the same and rolled into the next debt until it all went into the mortgage.

I was so dumb, I somehow didn't think it applied to me!

GirlRacer_2

When we start out debt free journey we all make excuses why we can't do without certain things in life i.e. takeaways, sky, lunch out etc etc. However for me once I realised that you don't have to give everything up forever it gave me incentive to pay it off quicker. We still had takeaways, just not every week, maybe just once a month. What I found was once I could see the debt decreasing my motivation increased. The biggest incentive for me had to be this site. I've made some fabulous friends who are in the same boat as me and their support has been fabulous.

I'm debt free now but I still check my bank balance every day, do my daily clicks, be quite frugal on times ad still post on here as much as possible.

However you've got to want to be debt free to be successful.

moanymoany

I think you've made an important point girlracer, allowing that treat - but keeping it under control.

What makes me smile is when a poster declares that they need a holiday, a break away. Can it be a Sun cheap week in a caravan in Skegness? Um, no, usually it is two weeks in the sun! In the old days - 50's and 60's we had holidays with relations and a day at the seaside. Lots of people had no holidays away at all - it isn't really a necessity.

duchy

I don't think DFW-dom is ever going to be the same for everyone
For some it's taking frugal to a new level-for others it is simply getting rid of the wants and sticking with the needs-and for most of us it's a balance somewhere between the two.
Yes some people want to get out of debt without "losing" anything-and the effort they put into trying to justify the wants might be better spent otherwise but most come around -at least in part- to the "money will not be my master anymore-I refuse to be it's slave" philosophy eventually.
For me personally DFW-dom is about getting more for my money and making it go further so there is spare cash for the nice things in life that I want-and learning that "I can't afford it" really means "I can't afford it-right now-so I'm making a plan so it will be possible later on" making it happen-then appreciating it FAR more once I've achieved my goal.
However that's just me-we ALL have different journeys and different planned destinations

immoral_angeluk

When we started out we were ruthless. Sold everything of value on ebay, cut EVERYTHING back, stopped having treats, started ruthless strict budgeting.. but now we're more comfortable with our debt we've relaxed a little and allowing ourselves a life as such.

Kevicho

I think being realistic with what you want to achieve, and also what your personality will allow.

Some people will relish living on thin air to reduce debt, while others would lose their motivation straight away so striking a balance is needed.

I think the thing that does make a successful DFW is learning, theres not just this site out there for this, but its probably up there with the most useful sources, especially for the community aspect.