Maternity Leave - feel selfish

floss2

One of our managers was due to finish in 4 weeks, at 39 weeks - she produced a baby girl at the weekend.....you never know what Nature has in store for you.

Why not speak to your Midwife/GP about your well-being - they may sign you off which will solve your worries about letting your employer down as they can't argue with a sick note.

BatCat

Hi Laura,
I too thought I could work until 38-39 weeks. Ha ha ha. I had a boss who said I wasn't tired, I just needed to manage my workload better.
Can I suggest a compromise?
See if you can go part time for the last month. Do 3 days a week or only mornings or something. This doesn't eat into your maternity leave, means you won't be sitting at home waiting (most first babies are late) and means you'll still have some money in. Most employers are happy to agree with some form of compromise rather than lose you altogether early.
And don't feel guilty. Your baby will be paying your employers' pensions!!
Cheers,
BatCat

temoana42

I may be wrong, but think that the first 6 weeks 90% pay is based on your average salary for previous 2 months. Therefore, might want to be careful about going part time towards the end - I might be wrong about this but check it out.

Im finishing at 38 weeks this friday. I too thought I could work up until the end, but you dont realise how tired and distracted you will feel - I probably should have finished a week ago but fortunately I dont have to commute this week so thats made it more manageable. I would hate to be hustled onto a train at the moment - it is nonsense that people will stand up for you in my experience. Ive had dirty looks when ive asked passengers to move their bags off the seat so i can sit down!

I wouldnt feel guilty about leaving sooner. Its hard to imagine early on, how you will feel later in the pregnancy and you will be so grateful of the rest. Money is always going to be affected, but I figure that even relatively well-off couples lose a chunk of their income and need to adjust. I would trust your body and finish when you feel you need to. Good luck and hope your boss sees sense

clairec79

I you have leave due though you can use that to make it into part time hours on full time pay. I think at 35 weeks I took the Wednesday off, then 36 and 37 had Tuesday and Thursday off (so used one weeks annual leave in total). My irst was born at 38 weeks which worked well.

cluuuuur

Hi Laura, I have to say that working until 40 weeks sounds a bit scary to me!

I'm currently 33 weeks and absolutely exhausted - I wish I could go off now, but like you I'm worried about money and "wasting" my 90% six weeks.

I suppose I'm quite lucky in that I work with young people, mainly in schools. My plan of action is to work until 37 weeks - but only because the last two weeks of those schools aren't in, so I can take the bus to the office and just catch up on paperwork, making it a bit more leisurely. From week 37-39 I'm taking annual leave, and then starting my maternity leave from week 39. I'm hoping that it's a good balance but, since this is my first, I'm pretty much making it up. I also have to go in to school for an important meeting 8 days before my due date as it was unavoidable - work are paying for a taxi in, but certain people are placing bets that my labour will start in the meeting!

If you do decide to carry on working, make sure you're taking breaks and not working "all out". The last thing you need is any additional stress! Good luck!

Mrs_Cupier

I've ummed and ahhed about answering this, but i see I'll now be backing someone else up, so I'm going to go for it.

Please, don't try to work so late into your pregnancy. You'll be exhausted before the baby even turns up, and the chances of you having to leave work suddenly because you're in labour are high. It sounds exciting in the abstract, but do you honestly want your waters to break in the office?

I worked to 34 weeks, and worked very hard during those last 6 weeks because I needed to hand things over, the office was short staffed, the clients were upset etc etc - all the usual office reasons. I left work on the Friday, had a placental abruption on the Sunday night and had DS delivered by emergency caesar on the Tuesday morning, at exactly 35 weeks. I felt for a long time that I had 'lost' 5 weeks, felt cheated of my time to prepare for his arrival, and had a baby in special care that couldn't feed for the first few days to deal with.

I believe this was because I worked too far into the pregnancy and too hard. I left with enough unpaid overtime due to me that I could have had the last fortnight off and still be paid without touching holiday. Thankfully, DS is fine, if a bit short (!), but it was a bad start that I could have avoided.

I know money is a worry for you, but you should find that once you stop work your costs actually go down - no more endless pairs of tights, coffee on the way to work, parking etc.

Please think about stopping sooner. (I'm going to look jolly silly now if you post in a few weeks saying you're 10 days overdue and very cross, but it can go either way)

DaisyFlower

I worked until 38 weeks, the last week was tiring but I made it as planned. Little on went 2 weeks over so I still had 4 weeks to wait and tbh I was bored silly.

Its personal choice when you finish, I'm glad I went to 38 weeks otherwise I would have been ever more bored and I really felt I wasted 4 weeks as it was.

MadDogWoman_2

Hi,

My DD was born in April last year, I worked to 37 weeks as I wanted to make the most of the 90% too, but I have since admitted that worked a week to much, I found that last week really tough. I think it was mainly the 1/4 mile walk to the office from the car park, followed by a queue at security (I work at an Airport).

I think next time (if there is one) I'll finish at 36 weeks.

I did enjoy my time at home resting, I also took the opportunity to go to a few aqua-natal classes and visit my local Baby Cafe, for advice about breastfeeding (https://www.thebabycafe.org), it was really nice to speak to mums who were already bf before I had mine, I got some really useful hints and tips.

HTH

MDW

P.S. I think because I took the time to rest it made recovery from an emergency c-section a bit easier.

nicola1982_2

I had to leave work at 20 weeks and bubs didn't come until 38 weeks. WE're not robots - pregnancy is hard work.

LilacPixie

no chancewith my first i was out of there at 32 weeks, it was the summer, i was swelling like a balloon andmy pelvis was seperating. This timei am currently 22 weeks pregnant andworkis getting difficult. I have got around 7 weeks worth of annual leave public holidays plus some flexi time and I intend on finishing at 32 weeks at the very latest.

Pregnancy is very hard and really you need to keep your strenth for labout and afterwards.

Let your partner deal with his own finances, unless he cancome to his own conclusion with regards to where he is going wrong nothing will change.