Game Over, or could a mod lock this please xxxx

xara

flamingice wrote: »

sorry about the length, just had to get that off my chest as it's really bothering me quite a lot.

You sound like you had a worse night than me and thats saying something!

George7

Flamingice it sounds like he's the one that should be grovelling, not you. Fancy leaving you when you've had a bad experience before That's just not on and in these days, he shouldn't just leave you in the dark and late at night anyway???? No wonder you're not happy hun -we are always here to listen to a rant xxx

flamingice

thanks everyone.
he's been acting really weird lately, switching between pulling me close and pushing me away (figuratively and literally speaking)
i know he was deeply affected by his best friend being killed earlier this year, and its probably something to do with that, just... i dont know. he turns into a different person when he drinks.
i love him so much but i just don't know what to do any more.

Hedobaby

flamingice it sounds like your OH is a flaming a**.... so I would ditch him as fast as possible.. he isnt treating you right and as a good friend told me..


DONT MAKE SOMEONE YOUR PRIORITY IF YOU REMAIN THEIR OPTION!

and i have never heard anything said that is truer... if he is just the end all be all of your life and you are the ill see ya when i see ya of his then it isnt ever going to be fair and you will always be sad about it.. and no you didnt do anything wrong he did but because you let him treat you this way he will continue to treat you this way.. find someone who treats you like a princess.. they are out there..

toniq

It doesnt mean he can treat you bad, never make excuses for someones behaviour, sit him down and ask him straight are you on or off, doesnt matter how much you love someone they dont always feel the same, you have to sort this out one way or the other asap, otherwise you will have a major head fluck xxxxx much luck xxxxxx

George7

I agree with the wise words of my fellow msers...sorry flamingice...drink is no excuse for bad behaviour (don't drink then if it makes you a bad person) and though the death of his friend may have something to do with it, he needs to get some counselling then if it's affecting him. Toniq is right, sit him down, find out if he does want to be with you and maybe suggest he gets some counselling for his grief. Good luck hun!

xara

Sometimes its not as easy as just ditching a person. It depends how long youve been together it harder to let go longer youve been together. Plus men have weird ways of coping with situations. Women are alot more open and expressive about their feelings. I think you may need to sit down and talk about everything. Plus talking from experience here people deal with death differently and its something that only if youve been through it yourself you cant really relate to it.

Hedobaby

xara wrote: »

its something that only if youve been through it yourself you cant really relate to it.

well.. i lost my best friend and her oh and son in a car accident.. my mother has died of lukemia.. my son was a twin and i lost one of the babies.. i would say i understand people dying.. and i never once treated my partner badly.. i know some people deal with death in a different way than i did... but i feel so badly for flaming that her OH is not treating her nicely.. even losing someone is no excuse for treating someone wrongly.. what if something had happend to her when she was all alone in a carpark?

flamingice

i don't feel like i can just leave him, he's my everything
he's lost his dad and his best friend in the past 2 years and ever since his friend died he's been acting really different. he's always had problems expressing his feelings and this has pushed him really far into himself, he doesn't talk about things any more and he's always really down and quiet
sometimes he can be really self centred as well which has been worse since he started withdrawing into himself
last time i tried to talk to him about our relationship (early feb), he said he wasn't sure he loved me any more
but then last week he said he really loved me and he wanted us to go away together this summer
so i really don't know what's going on but i just wish things could get back to how they used to be.

also the car park was like an indoor multiplex thing with cinema and bars and lots of people and bouncers around so i wasn't so much scared of being there, just walking from one place to the other

scottishfreebiehunter

flamingice wrote: »

i don't feel like i can just leave him, he's my everything
he's lost his dad and his best friend in the past 2 years and ever since his friend died he's been acting really different. he's always had problems expressing his feelings and this has pushed him really far into himself, he doesn't talk about things any more and he's always really down and quiet
sometimes he can be really self centred as well which has been worse since he started withdrawing into himself
last time i tried to talk to him about our relationship (early feb), he said he wasn't sure he loved me any more
but then last week he said he really loved me and he wanted us to go away together this summer
so i really don't know what's going on but i just wish things could get back to how they used to be.

also the car park was like an indoor multiplex thing with cinema and bars and lots of people and bouncers around so i wasn't so much scared of being there, just walking from one place to the other

Thing is and sorry if this is harsh but do you want to go through life being treated like !!!!!!!!!!
If he loves you then tell him to treat you better or that is it ,do not be treated like a doormat as not worth it and ruin youre life

I have lost people had a !!!!!! life past few years and you cannot treat people like that as no excuse