Invitation Nightmare! PLEASEPLEASE HELP!!! - Long!!

The_Good_Fairy

You do what you want to hun and make sure no-one talks you out of it! You don't want your day ruined by tension from families. Your Dad chose the babysitter over your family so he can live with his choice now. He didn't just betray your mum, he betrayed all of you. Maybe your OH's grandad can give you away? That'd be nice after him christening you as a baby

Oh and about the wedding dress for less than £100, have you seen these at M&S? They have some lovely ones, think I'll be having one of these myself

http://www.marksandspencer.com/gp/node/n/53624031?ie=UTF8&mnSBrand=core

Good luck! x

MoneySavingStudent_2

The Good Fairy - His grandad has parkinsons and isnt very well unfortunatly so that wouldnt really be an option.

Ive seen some lovely wedding dresses at debemhams the one i want is £350 but im keepin an eye on ebay lol

skintchick

WHy can't your mum give you away? It doesn;t have to be a male relative, or even a relative, just someone you feel very close to.

The_Good_Fairy

MoneySavingStudent wrote: »

The Good Fairy - His grandad has parkinsons and isnt very well unfortunatly so that wouldnt really be an option.

Ive seen some lovely wedding dresses at debemhams the one i want is £350 but im keepin an eye on ebay lol

Ah sorry about that then Good idea about your mum, or your sister? Or is sis your bridesmaid?

squidge60

hi its your day do what you want.all i would suggest is whatever you decide make sure you dont feel it was a wrong choice afterwards.!good luck x

shelovestobuystuff

DKLS wrote: »

Be strong and dont forget it is your day, and you can invite who you want to be at your wedding and if you want to leave somone out dont feel guilty.

I have cut my list down from 200 ish to 30, and in the process upset a few people, who seemed to think it was their day. In the end I laid down the law to the most interfering family members, and warned them that if they didnt stop interfeing, moaning, complaining and stirring they might just find that we elope abroad, and not invite any of them.

Well done for being so strong.I have to take of a leaf out of your book.

MoneySavingStudent_2

Unfortunatly my mums not been very supportive.
Shes all for the wedding but due to our family situation etc shes found a 'new bloke' which is fine and im glad shes happy. But shes started to neglect me and my sister alittle, ive been left to run the house, our home run business and go to university. Im feeling very stressed.
My sister is a very tom boy sort of person and has some disabilities so unfortunatly she wouldnt be able to do it either. Thank you for the suggestions though.
I dont mind walking down the aisle by myself but everyone else seems to think someone has to walk me down (including my finance)!
My dads been annoying recently and keeps bugging us to keep him informed about the wedding and to include him etc.

Ohh... My head hurts

haylibo

MSS, so sorry for you, makes me want a stiff drink reading it all.
Your mum needs a little time to recover from what has happened and her reaction is quite normal. Still, you need to protect yourself too. Could you put a limit on how much time you invest in running the house and business and explain that, although you want to support your family, you're not going to do it all?
You don't need someone to walk you down the aisle (I didn't and I felt great but then my two dds were with me as BMs and I was soooo proud of them I couldn't think of anything else - other than the guy at the other end ) but then you know that, despite what others are saying. Maybe you're listening to others so that you can give yourself an excuse to have your dad back and giving you away on your big day without having to forgive him for what has happened to your family. Guess what, you don't need an excuse to need your daddy to be with you on your wedding day nor to exclude his girlfriend.
I would talk to him, one-to-one and see what comes of it. He may see things differently but you can at least start negotiations
When is the wedding btw? Do you have much time to work something out?

MoneySavingStudent_2

haylibo wrote: »

MSS, so sorry for you, makes me want a stiff drink reading it all.
Your mum needs a little time to recover from what has happened and her reaction is quite normal. Still, you need to protect yourself too. Could you put a limit on how much time you invest in running the house and business and explain that, although you want to support your family, you're not going to do it all?
You don't need someone to walk you down the aisle (I didn't and I felt great but then my two dds were with me as BMs and I was soooo proud of them I couldn't think of anything else - other than the guy at the other end ) but then you know that, despite what others are saying. Maybe you're listening to others so that you can give yourself an excuse to have your dad back and giving you away on your big day without having to forgive him for what has happened to your family. Guess what, you don't need an excuse to need your daddy to be with you on your wedding day nor to exclude his girlfriend.
I would talk to him, one-to-one and see what comes of it. He may see things differently but you can at least start negotiations
When is the wedding btw? Do you have much time to work something out?

Ive decided definatly not to have him walk me down the aisle, id rather walk down by myself. My wedding is 31st July 2009 so i have plenty of time. Its just we went to the venue yesterday and got a great deal and then we're ringing the church tonight to make sure the dates free, and if everything goes okay we're going to be sending 'keep this date free' cards out etc (which i saved money on, being an artist i draw a picture on myself hehehe) and it whether to invite him on not etc. I think i may put him on the list but not really mention it much. For one thing hes not paying for the wedding, my auntie (who i would have loved to be there) unfortunatly just died, and shes left me some money in her will, so were using that to pay with help from my OHs parents/grandparents. The whole thing should come to just under £5000 which is brilliant for what we've got! 72 people + doggie to church/wedding breakfast and 115 guests to evening reception!

LilDevil

MoneySavingStudent wrote: »

The whole thing should come to just under £5000 which is brilliant for what we've got! 72 people + doggie to church/wedding breakfast and 115 guests to evening reception!

That's amazing, we've had to cut ours down to 25 for the ceremony/wedding breakfast (£1000 for ceremony/breakfast/evening do for 25 people) as it's just too expensive (OH is from the family of the 5000!!) - all told, we're having about 141 to the evening do (that includes everyone at ceremony).

We're gonna upset a lot of his family as he has 3 sisters, 2 of which have partners - they all have 3-4 kids, who in turn have 1-4 kids each, we've had to draw the line at just sisters and partners - his mum is not too happy about it, but at £39 extra per person, it's not an option (unless of course, they pay the £39 themselves!)