HELP - Leap Year proposal

little_miss_messiah

Right, I've now decided I'm going to propose to my OH of 18 1/2 years on 29th Feb.

Problem is we kinda got engaged WAY back when I was 17 and lost a vodka race to him, he bought me a small diamond ring (which I wore for many years but lost the diamond for) but there was no celebration and we didn;t really tell anyone. Marriage has been discussed sporadically but not since his v religious Mum sadly passed away 5 years ago.

However, he can't wear a ring due to his job, he already has a fancy pants watch so I don't have anything lasting to give him.

I've ordered Thorntons alphabet truffles with the magic question on, is this acceptable?

My other idea is to arrive at his work with a ghetto blaster held up paying a suitably smoochy song a la some 80s brat pack fillum.

And after almost 20 years together, we've already outlasted most of our friends marriages, I don't think an engagement party is appropriate.

Sorry I'm just having a big downer ever since deciding to do this and don't want it to be non event of the year.

Any advice greatly appreciated

Debt_Free_Chick

little_miss_messiah wrote: »

I've ordered Thorntons alphabet truffles with the magic question on, is this acceptable?

My other idea is to arrive at his work with a ghetto blaster held up paying a suitably smoochy song a la some 80s brat pack fillum.

And after almost 20 years together, we've already outlasted most of our friends marriages, I don't think an engagement party is appropriate.

I really think that your proposal has to be personal to you both.

Does he like chocolates? If not, ditch them. If he does, then pop over to MS Old Style and we'll show you how to make them Homemade with about 5 ingredients. I promise you, they will WOW anyone more than Thorntons.

What floats his boat? Tell us what makes him happy/excited and we'll help.

This is not what would make you say "yes" .... what would make HIM say "yes"?????

morg_monster

When my cousin got married this year, her husband-to-be really isn't a ring wearing type so she had a pair of cufflinks custom made with a very small diamond on each, in a similar look to her engagement ring. Not suggesting you go to that expense (though I don't think they were hugely pricey) but just the cufflinks idea might be good if you are looking for a ring replacement? Again - assuming he wears them!

Mrs7ones

little_miss_messiah wrote: »

However, he can't wear a ring due to his job, he already has a fancy pants watch so I don't have anything lasting to give him.


Any advice greatly appreciated

Hi,
when we got engaged, I bought my OH a white gold wedding band as an engagement ring.... surely your OH is aloud to wear a plane wedding band for work??.
(When we got married, he started to wear the white gold band on the other hand to make way for his wedding ring)

celyn90

Ahh hun, whatever you decide to do he won't forget! And it won't be a non event whatever you do, you've been together - as you quite rightly say - for longer than a lot of marriages last.

I think personal is the way to go too, but you have to decide. Could you maybe recreate the first proposal back when you were 17? Is there a special place that both of you love? Something that connects you - a film, a piece of music, a hobby, events from your past, anything? What do the two of you like to do?

I can't wear rings (or any jewellery) because of my work either - it doesn't mean I wouldn't want one. You have already given him something lasting - that being you! and the longevity of your relationship has already proven that the most important things aren't material. Maybe you could get the ring he gave you repaired (if you want to of course - just a suggestion)?

The amount of time you've been together does not preclude you from having an engagement party if you want one. If anything I think it is more special as you've already proved you can go the distance. cel x

floss2

How about an engraved hip flask? Or silver cufflinks engraved with his initials on one & yours on the other?

When DF & I got engaged (age 42!) we didn't bother with a party....our celebrations lasted as long as it took to get round all the family & friends! But maybe when you get married, you can have the party then?

BTW, you've lasted longer together than my courtship & marriage did....17 3/4 yrs

little_miss_messiah

Big thanks to all, think I'm just having a bit of a wobble...

He LOVES chocs, so I'm gonna stick with the Thorntons, but give them at the place we very first met, it's a v trendy nightclub now, but back in the day twas a rock club and our eyes met over Motley Crue , I'm gonna call the venue and ask if they will just play one special request and do it there chocs etc, just the two of us and then on for a meal.

The reason he can;t won;t wear jewellry at work is he's a carpenter and he's had way too many near finger removing misses with the tools to risk it, he has 2 hip flasks (one for each, apparently ) and He prob wears a dressy shirt twice a year, bit of a waste on cufflinks.

Think I'm gonna get my original ring repaired too.

And after all this he might just say no, the swine

whitewing

Sad, I am, I know, but I remember watching a TV programme once where the ladies proposed to their partners, and, when the chaps did actually realise how much their missus wanted to get married they were very humbled and wished they'd done it years ago.

*sob*

bandraoi

Do you really want to do it in public?

floss2

bandraoi wrote: »

Do you really want to do it in public?

It's no different to proposing in a restaurant....and I don't think the DJ is going to be doing the asking, just playing the song....

Hope he doesn't go to the loo at the "wrong" time!

bandraoi

floss2 wrote: »

It's no different to proposing in a restaurant....and I don't think the DJ is going to be doing the asking, just playing the song....

Hope he doesn't go to the loo at the "wrong" time!

True, but a public proposal, in a restaurant/night club/gathering of friends, wouldn't be my thing, or most of my friends which is why I brought it up.

It's a point worth thinking about, from both sides of the equation.
Will you OH want other people there?