Breaking-up and in debt.....

Benthosboy

Hello all. Sorry if this is in the wrong place but as I'm in a bit of a state, well a lot of a state if truth be known, hopefully, you'll bear with me.

After 16 years, my wife told me last week that she is leaving me. It's a complete bombshell and nothing I say has any effect, She just keeps saying that she wants to go her own way and isn't prepared to try anyhing. To say I'm is an understatement.

Since this happened, I've found out that due to my letting her "take care" of the finances, we owe about £16K on various credit cards as well as the final year of a loan that we took out to buy a motorhome, 13 monthly payments of £488. We work at a caravan park and live in tied accomodation and she is moving out next month but our employers are :A and are more than happy for me to keep working here whilst living in the motorhome. The problem I have is that she wants to split the cc debts between us and while undoubtedly I'm as responsible for them as she is, I don't know howI can manage to pay everything off. I want to keep the motorhome as I don't have anywhere else to live and I'm also keeping our two rescue dogs which she is happy to walk away from, That makes me very :mad: !

I don't know wether to try and get a loan and go down the consolidation road. In fact I just don't know what to do or which way to turn. As if being left wasn't bad enough, I feel so stupid for letting her get the finances in such a mess. I feel close to desperation and if it wasn't for the dogs, I'd just walk away and keep walking. If anyone has any advice, I'd be extremely grateful.

Thanks very much in advance.

Martyn.

bountiful

Hi there - sorry to hear your news - bummer! Have you read the newbies info at the top of the board - it kind of tells you how to go about getting the most useful advice. Suggest you go and read that now. Then try to get together a SOA (statement of affairs) to show all your income and outgoings, including debts with rates of interest etc.
The first step is the hardest - and you've done that

Bunnyinthelights

Hi Martyn,
Read the sticky about SOA and post it up so we can try to help-I personally would avoid consolidating but need more info really.

Keep posting and good luck, you'll get tremendous support from all the DFW's!

GirlRacer_2

Good evening and congratulations on posting, this is the first step in getting this sorted. As bountiful said, post your SOA and we'll all have a look at what we can help you sort out.

I wouldn't go down the consolidation route but it may be worthwhile seeing if you can get a credit card with 0% balance tranfers and at least transferring as much as you can onto the 0% card.

Hopefully when you get your SOA posted up everyone will pop along and give you what help and support they can.

Good luck

SpongeBobSP

sorry for the stupid/ignorant question...

Why do you have to keep the dogs?

Benthosboy

SpongeBobSP wrote: »

sorry for the stupid/ignorant question...

Why do you have to keep the dogs?

That's the kind of question that only a non-dog lover would ask.

As I was typing out the original post, Finn the Collie, arguably the most intelligent creature I have ever met, walked up to the side of me, stuck his nose under my arm then put his front paws ever so gently up onto my legs and gave me a big doggy fuss. Amazingly, he's just done the same again and when I look at the Witch, aka Mollie the Spaniel, her her eyes light up with joy and her entire body shakes with delight.

Dog lovers will understand.....

Martyn.

pania

with you entirely!!!!!!!!!!! shame that pets are seen as disposable, sometimes they are the only ones to keep you going....

saversarn

Benthosboy wrote: »

Dog lovers will understand.....
.

The dogs will see you through this :grouphug: hug to you and to your four legged friends

Numpty_Monkey

:hello:
just to say welcome,
the help, advice, support, friendship you can get from here is unbelievable, also available are a shoulder to cry on and a kick up the jacksie (only when asked for):D
Wish i could remember the thread it was and who said it(could have been RAS or Fermi or ROG2) but i think it said 80% of people who consolidated there debts, 2 years later were in more debt :eek:
so i don't think consolidation is a good way to go, I know that if i could have got a consolidation loan to pay my credit card off, it would be running up again:eek: , guess 1 off the benefits for having a carp credit rating:o

ps i think i'd rather have a cat again than a dog again:rolleyes:

frosty

Benthosboy wrote: »

That's the kind of question that only a non-dog lover would ask.

As I was typing out the original post, Finn the Collie, arguably the most intelligent creature I have ever met, walked up to the side of me, stuck his nose under my arm then put his front paws ever so gently up onto my legs and gave me a big doggy fuss. Amazingly, he's just done the same again and when I look at the Witch, aka Mollie the Spaniel, her her eyes light up with joy and her entire body shakes with delight.

Dog lovers will understand.....

Martyn.

dogs always know when your upset,they have away of making you feel better:D .They will be the reason you will get through this;) .
I have two bassets and they are my world and as you said only an animal lover will understand.

Benthosboy

saversarn wrote: »

The dogs will see you through this :grouphug: hug to you and to your four legged friends

You'll possibly never know just how much that, and all the other nice replies, means to me. However, the fact that I'm typing with a tear or two on my face should tell you something....

Thanks again.

Martyn.