help deep in debt

Xbigman

If you go bankrupt you still have to pay the secured loans/mortgage so in this case I think thats not a straight forward option.

One thing. Many councils will not rehouse people with large mortgage arrears. Speak to CAB and check on this. You might be advised to try to pay the main mortgage even if you can't pay the secured loan/s.
Regards



X

Dammam

God - makes my "things aren't that bad" look more than a little glib now. I'm sorry about that - I would imagine there's another poster feeling pretty lousy too.

Your posts show a lot of strength and character - both of these qualities will stand you in good stead in the coming months/years. I can't help noticing that you mention how good things were 4 years ago, and that your husband had debts, he thought it was a good idea to buy, he wanted to be self employed etc. Do you feel any resentment towards him for the way things are now? If so, it may become a problem. As it is, you have problems hammering away from outside the family unit, any resentment could start hammering away from the inside and bring the whole lot tumbling down. If you blame your husband, maybe he's picking up on this and blaming himself even more.
I feel for you, you're having to fight major battles on many fronts here. I think all of us here will lend you support as and when required, but you also need professional support - medically & financially.

The only other things I can offer you are my good wishes and my prayers - both of which I give with pleasure - and my confidence that you can overcome all of this.

johannamse

Hey Mspig,

I am really sorry for everything you are going through. You sound like a hero, carrying everyone elses problems on your back. Life really can change quickly - this should be a lesson for ALL! You should also bear this in mind when trying to battle through this difficult time. Things can get bad quickly and things can get good again quickly.

By the way, is your husband getting all the medical attention he needs. If he cannot get out of bed, then get a GP to come round. When you are swimming in the mess, you sometimes do not think of everything that may be of help.

I know your Mum has physical problems of her own, but I am sure she is still a good listener. You need to use all the support you can get at the moment. Ring the Samaritans if it gets too much.

Sorry I do not have any solid finance advice. Things will get better, they always do. I am thinking of you.

delboypass

Sorry if my views are considered harsh.
I am just a realist and although I may come across harsh.

All i can say is thanks to the government.

Q. Can the OP confirm that the 25k loan that was secured to do up the house was spent doing up the house and not used to finance previous debt?

Surely the lesson hasnt been learnt though I suppose is the point im trying to bring across. There was already a relionship of debt yet they took on further debt when the original couldnt be financed.

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If neither of you now has any income, the only thing you can do is claim bankrupcy especially as it seems that neither of you due to your personal circumstances will be going to work in the short term. As others say, Contact CAB and they will discuss your finances through with you.

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In terms of the pregnancy, im only speaking from my point of view is that im seeing more and more kids being raised without the proper financial support that they require to grow and nurture them effectively. I personally wouldnt bring any child into this world If i wasnt in a position to financially support it. I dont see this as harsh but a reality.

Im sorry for your personal circumstances but in life people must define their own paths.

TheBottomLine_2

delboypass wrote:

In terms of the pregnancy, im only speaking from my point of view is that im seeing more and more kids being raised without the proper financial support that they require to grow and nurture them effectively. I personally wouldnt bring any child into this world If i wasnt in a position to financially support it. I dont see this as harsh but a reality.

Okay mate, I'll concede that you have a fair point on this subject. However, these threads are to help and support those people who really need it. If you want to discuss the rights and wrongs of parenting then another message board is better suited.

dprovan

I personally wouldnt bring any child into this world If i wasnt in a position to financially support it. I dont see this as harsh but a reality.

.[/QUOTE]



Having seen your views on this forum just don't bring kids into this world full stop....

mountainofdebt

Mspig,

You may not want to do it whilst you are pregnant but have you thought about childminding yourself?

viktory

Hi

The only thing I can say, is thank goodness the council have agreed to house you, should you (sadly) lose your home. You are fortunate in that respect (although I can understand if you don't feel terribly fortunate). Never mind where the house is, grab it with both hands! It's a roof over your heads. You could then look for a mutual exchange to get back to your preferred area.

I can remember (a long time ago) spending 6 weeks in a grubby B&B, followed by 18 months in a shared hostel before the council housed me in a 17th floor tower block. At least you don't have to do that, it was awful.

Good luck with everything.

Vicky

Dammam

Well, I hope your luck changes soon, surely it must? I'm glad you don't blame your husband, but don't blame yourself either. I would say blame your !!!!!! ex, but he really isn't worth the effort is he? I'm sorry I brought up the blame issue, but if it was there it could have been so destructive.
Now, you still have each other, your determination and you have friends here who you can speak to when you're at a low ebb. Sometimes, just typing your problems out can get them off your chest and allow you to see them with a new clarity.
I wish I had a tenth of your strength.

delboypass

I dont want to sound harsh but are you running two seperate threads?

One for yourself and one for your folks and all of you are considering going bankrupt?

Soon you'll be experts and can inform us all of the process i would have thought.

Maybe its time to stop blaming the individuals and start looking at the companies lending credit.

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=74011