Should we move? Scary neighbours ...

cowbutt

Jenna wrote: »

I am rather puzzled by the comment about him/us swinging our fists - I could just be being blonde though!

It's a comment on the responsible limitation of personal freedom; one is free to do whatever one likes until it starts to affect other people, at which point a balance needs to be struck between granting one person the freedom to do what they like (e.g. swinging their fists around), and not placing undue burden upon others to put up with it (e.g. being hit on the nose because someone was swinging their fists around without consideration).

marksandsparksgal

I feel really sorry for the OP...the neighbour is clearly in the wrong by shouting!

I have the same problem, I have a guy who lives underneath me who gets up at 3am or so every morning in the week. The problem I have is floorboards...sometimes when you walk on them they make the most hideous creaking noise, and there is nothing I can do about it as the building is so old. he thinks I'm having a party but I'm walking / tiptoeing, which results in him banging on the floor, and coming up and shouting! My roomie goes to bed at 11, so then I have my earphones in, and usually sit at the desk, only getting up for a drink/bathroom etc,...I guess what I'm trying to say is, sometimes these things can't be helped.

I think the neighbour is giving the OP a pretty raw deal to be honest. If he works shifts then his routine is always going to clash with someone else's, and as has already been stated, the OP hears everything from his flat too. Sometimes there is nothing you can do but just get on with it (she says as the upstairs neighbours clomp on the floor and make her lamp swing!)

angelflower_2

Jenna wrote: »

angelflower ~ Yes they are quite modern, I believe they were built in the last 3 years. I don't really know what a factoring company is? The neighbours have bought their flat, whereas we are renting, so I don't know if this would even apply? The thin walls are a pain and I personally probably wouldn't buy in a flat anyway (do to building service fees which can rise quite sharply sometimes - we've had friends who've been stung by this in the past) ... moving is not the expensive thing, last time we hired a Transit van for £35 for 1 day and got lots of friends involved too. The cost that does concern me is the new rent as going forward this could have a massive impact on our day to day budget.

The factoring company is the one who manages the communal charges, the cleaning and grounds etc. You might find that they will favour the owner occupier though. I would still try and give them a phone. There number should be displayed somewhere in the stairwell.

Merlot

angelflower wrote: »

The factoring company is the one who manages the communal charges, the cleaning and grounds etc. You might find that they will favour the owner occupier though. I would still try and give them a phone. There number should be displayed somewhere in the stairwell.

If you live in England, they are usually called the Managing agents, Factoring is usually the Scottish term.

Jenna

dancingfairy ~ I guess it varies a lot on people's opinions, on week nights we tend to watch TV or a film so it doesn't come into question - on the weekends then a bit later is OK. I think 11pm is pretty reasonable as a general rule of thumb (whether turning it right down or off), I guess we have just been too inexperienced to have thought of that in advance (not having lived on our own before) ... and (in hindsight) letting people know about it ahead of time would help too. In saying that - we've been here a year and only had complaints in the last 2 weeks so we can't be that bad lol!

cowbutt ~ Thankyou, that makes much more sense now

M&S gal ~ Thankyou for the sympathy , it was a bit scary at the time! Can you explain the floorboards creaking issue to him? I'm sure someone suggested buying ear plugs as pressies before ... ... but yeah seriously it is a bit rude that he shouts just because you're walking around! I know it's not really "our problem" that he works shifts, and in truth (if I was him) I wouldn't have bought a flat because of the noise issue ... but even so I don't want to make his life miserable either!

Thanks both for the factoring agent explanation ... here we have a landlord (who owns our property), letting agent (who advertised the place to us and takes our rent / holds our deposit) and building management company (who own the whole building and are responsible for maintaining it). I've now explained the situ to our landlord and said we're probably moving to a house ... she reckons we should report it too but in all honesty I don't want to, I don't want to make our neighbours' lives tough and I equally don't want to impose a curfew on myself.

taka

Old flats definitely can have thin walls too... I can hear my next door neighbours opening their curtains :eek: Good luck!

kizzykizzywizzy

Yes - move in a few months to a year - keep an eye out for a good deal on rent

Having lived in a flat & been driven mental by the noise, so as it was affecting my health. I actually sympathise with both you & your neighbour. Flats unfortunately are not the places to have partys, even small ones or Karaoke, I understand that you should by rights be able to enjoy yourself in your own home, but not at the cost of another persons enjoyment of thier home. I think also that at the weekend you should be able to enjoy yourselves until slightly later say midnight at the latest, it really isn't your fault that he works shifts, but not on a regular basis.
I would imagine he became agressive because he is being driven spare by the noise you are making, we lived in a downstairs flat, yes we had washing machine noise & stomping about, which couldn't be helped but the loud music & the shouting in the hallway which was by our bedroom meant there was no room in a one bedroom flat to which we could escape. You can blame the building to some extent, but we had several different neighbours in the 8 years we lived there & 2 were terrible one was just about bearable & 2 were fine.
I think he has probably outgrown living in a flat & has probably been bothered by other tennants in your flat & probably thought, here we go again, I know we did. We unfortunately couldn't move because we were in neg equity & the service charges were horrendous & were behind on them, so that was another niggle for us, he may have the same problems.
I think he should move, because working shifts & living in a flat do not mix, but I doubt he will, so I think you need to get looking for somewhere more suitable for your lifestyle, which I understand isn't excessive, but just doesn't work where you are now
Good Luck

In_Search_Of_Me

Read this with interest! I live in a top floor flat and can sympathise with the noise issue. Waving fists about within an inch of your face is blatant intimidation though & not acceptable. I would either start logging things (incidents, noise they make) as evidence (which is what the noise abatemet people suggest) and if he continus to complain I suggest you tell him that he ca have a noise monitior put in my noise abatement if he feels your noise is unreasonable. Not sure that 4 people is a party unless very loud but can appreciate their annoyance at karioke but then he has his washing machine on at night when you are sleeping so he's not being reasonable either!! Noise issues are stressful (my lovely neighbor has never been forgiven for selling his flat! we happily coexisted for 8 years & now I feel I am treading on egg shells!) and you alone can decide which is more important - moving & paying more or staying & trying to work it out! Also not your fault he wrks nghts but can also see his point having worked nights - when I wanted to sleep everyone else was out to play which was really annoying but thats a choce he makes! I suppose what I'm saying is that I feel for both of you but in no way is his behaviour acceptable....if you did make a complaint then it would be on the file when he came to sell which would come up on the report!

elantan

ive had the neighbour from hell that's why i am now up tp my eyes in mortgage payments and living in a detatched house and loving every minute of it ...good luck

emily_jackson

With regards to your mental health, I would go to your GP but you may be put on a waiting list, so I'd look on the internet to get info on mental health charities and see if they are of any use.