We are being evicted, some advice please...... the date has arrived......

mumoftwins

ampersand wrote: »

Totally pointless facts from WW tonight.
Eat a 200gm Lindt choc bunny - needs 4 years of brisk walking to 'undo' it.
Next one, to walk off even one M&M, one brisk circuit of a standard football field is necessary.
As for Cadbury's creme eggs, do you really want to spend 21 YEARS on exercise to undo 6?
Some of these 'facts' smelt of MediGoogle - but still.
Upon which cheery note(esp. as I LOATHE

No need for me to go to WW's this morning then A?? :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Careful_with_that_Axe

Morning hun. Hope it's another sunny one.
Don't worry about PMing me - I know you have lots to sort still. Keep plugging away and know that you will get there in the end. There will come a point when this ends well and then it will be in the past.
Sending you lots of virtual hugs, chocolate and anything else that feeds the need.
J
x
p.s. having just read posts, looks like you have best local advice available for your area on tap! Good stuff!

blue_monkey_2

Morning everyone, just a quickie as been to church with Mya and have to get Ryan from school shortly. I am soooooo looking forward to almost 3 weeks off school.... will be nice if it snows though

I need some impartial and honest advice from you guys. We have been blinkered by the fact we have found a house no-one else will probably want and because our points are high we will *probably* get it.... however, there are some buts and they did keep me awake last night. Hubby has gone off to work with a big chip on his shoulder because I dared mention them, which has upset me a lot really, as we need to make sure this is the right choice all round as any place we get will be long term, it won't be like we can keep on putting in for places and turning them down, that goes against you and I need to make sure things are right before I go ahead and apply.

So, the good points I already mentioned - and they are good.

The bad points, which I only really thought about when in bed last night after a bad dream (included Barry Manilow and McFly - don't ask why I really haven't a clue!! LOL!!)

This house is up a steep bank - there are around 14 houses, the empty one is in the middle. There is no parking near the house and the car has to be parked a good 4-500 yards away in a car park - no way of access to the car from by the house as the bank is a sheer drop onto the road. This means should I have to return to the car for anything I really cannot leave Ryan alone in the house on his own - I cannot evenlet him play in a room on his own (example, he bit electric cables the other day in a tantrum - plugged in cables!!) he won't want to walk back and forth so it would be one trip out of the car and that would have to be it. The car park is on a sharp bend, off a fast country road and we would have to cross the road to get to the car park. Generally Ryan runs off - I am not naive to think I can keep one hand on him every moment as is the case here, we are lucky in that there are very, very few cars here so if he runs in the road I yell at him and he (is supposed) to learn that roads are bad - he doesn't though as he has no fear of danger. I think this is what kept me awake this morning more than anything else. Location wise the house is not at all suitable, and this should be my priority, shouldn't it? That the kids are safe?

Also, I am not going to have a garden for the whole of the summer at least, the kids won't be able to go and play out there at all. While the garden is huge it needs a lot of work and this is going to be expensive - it is very well talking about it but it is £100 to hire the shredder just t get rid of the trees and brambles and we don't have a great deal of money to spent. I would seriously say that removing the rubble, shrubs and turfing it or whatever, it likely to cost hundreds - maybe more. My husband only gets 3 weekends out of 4 and tht is if the weather is good and if he does not get offered overtime, which he has to work because the money is good. The house has to be done first and the garden is on a steep slope but, near the back door it has a stepped patio which has started subsiding in places and is sloped at around 25% angle upwards, so we could not even use anything temporary on it because it is not big enough. So the kids could not actually use the garden at all until, at least, the bottom bit was done. This means we have to remove around 2ft high x 16ft x 16ft of patio, garden rubble etc.. Now hubby has said we can put it at the top of the garden, which we can't as a) you cannot get up there and b) you cannot get a laden wheel barrow up 3 x 12" steps, to get to the next level for a start unless you happen to be one of the 'Heroes'. There is actually nowhere at all to be able to put a skip or for rubble to be collected because of where the house is situated - right in the middle of the steep bank, with a path running along the front of it.

So I am now very confused.

So what to do.

When I wrote to the council asking to be considered for a 3 bedroom because of Ryans problems I explained to them (as I mentioned earlier in the thread) that we would need an enclosed garden and also that we needed somewhere safe for him location wise because he has no sense of danger. This property currently has neither of these things.

I guess this is why it was not offered to us as people looking.

I do think we have got so embroiled in the fact that the house and garden it will be perfect when it is finished, but we have overlooked that it is not totally suitable for Ryan's needs now - and this is why we have extra points, it is what we have been to see doctors for, it is wha we have had letters written for. It seems very selfish to disregard these facts just because 'it is there' when the location and garden situation as it is, is not right for our needs and yesterday we had not considered this. I think because my husband is at work all day then he does not appreciate that I cannot pend the whole summer holidays in the house with 2 hyped up children. There are o parks nearby, not even a walk, it is very rural. I would have to drive, and if I am honest,the thought of spending each and every day driving to and sitting in a park is not something I want to do as nothing will get done around the house either.

ARGH!!

Don't worry, I am still OK and I feel OK about this, I am just tired as I did not sleep much and a bit upset that my husband cannot see past getting anywhere to live even if it is not suitable for what Ryan needs - let's be honest, if he did not have these needs then we would not be down for a 3 bedroom house with a garden anyway and would probably get a 2 bedroom flat.

So please all be brutally honest with me, I am going to go on another drive over the weekend, we have until Wednesday to put our names down for it and express our interest - that is all, no obligation, it does not go against us as we are not officially homeless yet anyway. I am worried about 'making do' when there might be something more suitable for him in a fortnights or a months time. I am tied between it being a great house and POTENTIALLY a great garden, but at this minute the locaton is absolutely no good for Ryan until he gets some better road sense and also that it is going to take a good year - and a lot of money - to get a garden that they can play in properly. We are going to be £500 a year worse off if we move to this house, the extra rent, fuel to get to and from school and also because at the moment I am getting backdated tax credits which finishes this month - and they just this week sent me a bill for an overpayment of £650, so next year I am not going to get any tax credits.

That system sucks btw!! They give you a refund when you get the figures in and then you and then give them the same figures on another form and they take it back!!

Tell me your honest thoughts as you know I do value them. I probably won;t be back until tonight as school finishes early today. Thanks xx

blue_monkey_2

Hi SC, just to add quickly, looked through the HCC stuff yesterday and it did not answer specifically so I emailed them and asked.

Also found out that I should of been getting free school dinners and uniform when DD started Receptio last year so going into the school today to see if I can get a backdated claim in. Nothing ventured and all that

tigerfeet2006

Hi BM. I have been a lurker on your thread for a while and want to wish you all the best.

As for the house I probably wouldn't go for it. We have a shared car park, usually can't park any where near the path. We then have a 500 yd path to the house and you can't see the car park when in the house or vis a versa. When we have a big shop it is a bloomin' nightmare to get every thing in doors. Carrying loads up and down from the car park is a pain espcially if I have to get a taxi home. I have a 2 year old and a baby and still haven't worked out what the best thing to do is :eek: .

ampersand

It feels more 'NO!-ish' now, bm.
Leave aside the when/cost/timescale for garden(there are ways around costs.)
There are too many other factors mitigating against it for Ryan as he is now.
It's on that basis that your housing needs are being assessed/pointed and on that basis that you are living now - not in any future scenario when things have/may have improved.

silvercar

Very difficult quandary (sp) for you.

I would forget the garden problem; that would be solved eventually. Even if you don't have a garden this Summer you would have one in the future and if another house came up that ticks all the boxes except the garden you would probably take it.

My concern is not being able to park. Sounds like you can't leave Ryan for a moment so would have to take him to the house with whatever shopping you had. Only way it would work is if you committed yourself to delivery shopping every time you needed a large shop; at least then the Tesco van driver would bring everything to your front door.

Really hard to advise, as who knows when another house will come available that is suitable and once your eviction date becomes closer will you be obliged to accept what is offered.

Just a thought, if no-one wants this house that is eligible, could you be forced to take it at a later date?

blue_monkey_2

Hi guys,

Thank you. I wanted an impartial view, people who could see aside from getting somewhere to live.

My hubby called after I left the post and I mentioned the road and garden situation to him and he said 'he did not see what I had to deal with daily so if I did not think it was right then we would no go for it'. Which is what I said really, he must of thought on things some more (although still maintains he was not in a strop about it!!) He has now also decided that no, this place is not for us and we will continue to wait. Whatever the outcome is we will deal with it. We cannot disregard what Ryan needs, this is the most important thing for NOW and it will not be safe for him.

SC, if they house us here it will be on a temporary basis - they can still put us in there rather than in a hostel yes, but it will be until something else comes up that we are more suited to. Should they say that we are to stay here permanantly we have 21 days to appeal and give our reasons - but I think they are aware that it is not ideal which is why itdid not get offered to us - the area is on my ticklist of choices but not on the one that they are looking for us in to keep Ryan close as possible to school. If that makes sense!!

So, we will say no for now as these are based on 'choices' and see if there is something in the next fortnight. I think we are both so desperate to not be seen as 'homeless' we are 'making do' and not thinking about the whole picture. I am disappointed but also not because the worry of something happening to Ryan was stressing me out more than anything else. I was also worried that my husband may blame me if we get somewhere else that is not as ideal housewise but is ideal location wise (if you know what I mean). He said he would not blame me if that was the case and that we would deal with it. I am pleased I looked first though, if we had applied for it and then we had said no good because of location, this could have gone against us in the future because this must be why they give out the location.

It is hard to epxlain to people about Ryan so it is nice that you all understand. My life is on 'hold' while he is here - even going to the toilet has to be done in minimal time as he cannot be left. I feel bad for wanting to see him go to school full time but it willbe e relief that I might be able to read a daily paper or watch something other than Pingu!!

So, as you can imagine Pingu is on the TV, it just started raining and the wind is howling. Thanks for being my ears in all of this, I'll read through the other posts and PM's later on this evening and get back to you all them. Thank you and big hugs again. You are all invaluable in the help and advice you give, I really don't think I would be keeping things so well together if I did not have everyone one on hear to help and listen.

Of course, you are all invited to the housewarming when we finally get there

MummyHol

Hi BM- its a shame the place isn't suitable for you. It will definately be easier to explain if you don't bid on the property then if you bid and then decline it.
I've got my fingers crossed for something more suitable coming up in the next list.

I think i've already told you were my OH works? So if you do get a place that needs work he's said he *should* be able to get you discount on any tools you need to hire (i think its 50% friends and family discount) which should make things a bit easier on the finances!

Big hugs xx

nimbo

good luck on the pingu front, (the problem i always had was nemo... could still quote it lol)

and it isn't bad to lool forward to Ryan going to school. we all need 'alone' time, and at school the teachers will all be supportive of him, and he'll be in safe hands.