19 year old daughter in debt

Squiffy

You are definitely doing the right thing.

About ten years ago I stupidly took out a loan for my brother to help him pay off various things and reduce his outgoings.

Of course he stopped paying it after about 9 months. And the monthly repayments at the time equated to about 25% of my monthly income at the time. :mad:

He owes our parents even more than he owes me.

So I would definitely not co-sign this loan. If she wants a car, then she should save up for it.

James240

i agree with Squiffy, my borther has over £30,000 worth of debt and i love to help him but i get the feeling that i would have the exact problem that Squiffy has met with his brother. My brother seems to bury himself head first in the sand beliving that everyone else is at fault because he has so much debt.

All he constantly does is ponce money of my mother who earns little enough as it is :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: and then still bleets that he doesnt have enough money but then this is the best bit, goes and gets parking tickets because he says my mum wouldnt give him the £3.00 for the parking ticket :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: ............................................. i totally sympathise with your posistion Squiffy as your brother is probably like mine although we love them that are ultimatley never going to be helped as they will continue to drag themselves and everyone who helps them down.

Sorry to go slightly off track of the Thread but i definatley know were Squiffy is coming from.

Happy money saving veveryone and you have definatley done the right thing happymum! :j

Bendybops19

I'm 20 and i got a loan when i was 19 for a newish car because of the distance i travelled to work. I dont see a problem with getting a loan as long as u are responsible enough to be able to pay for it.
I have never had a credit card and wont be getting one....i hope!! :rolleyes:

I didnt expect my parents to help out with my loan in any way as it was my decision to get a car, but they were very supportive.

I agree that the OP is doing the right thing. With her daughter already in debt with credit cards, it doesnt look like a great starting point for getting a loan!!

Just make sure u are supportive and not patronising towards her. She is right in a way that it is 'her business' but i can pratically guarantee that she will want ur help and advice, even if she doesnt show it! Shes probably quite frightened by it all.

bigfella_3

I am 20 and I would say youve done a great thing, you have saved her from wasting money, cars fine would be lovely to have a new car but why not go to car auction and get a nice little runner for next to nothing compared to needing to get a loan etc.

Also i have debt and would have loved for some1 older to step in and give me a shake when i went for store cards etc!

Midget_Karen

Slightly off track, but as a 22 year old i know that car insurance for young people is very expensive, so a slightly older, cheaper, less expensive to insure etc car isn't unreasonable.

And back on track, i think you've done the right thing. if you give her everything now she'll want everything always, and the debt problems may well get worse.

happymom_2

Thanks for your support, my daughter feels she's has everything under control and that she has no problem with having debt and she will pay it off as soon as she can, but she is still spending way too much $$$$ on clothes, etc. She thinks we are making way too much of a fuss of this and that we need to let her run her life how she see's fit. So with that said there's not much we can do about her debt situation as the moment. We've tried talking budgets with her and she has no desire to do that either. All we can do is pray right now that she DOES have everything under control. Thanks so much for all your kind words.Sincerely, Happymom

margaretclare

happymom wrote:

Thanks for your support, my daughter feels she's has everything under control and that she has no problem with having debt and she will pay it off as soon as she can, but she is still spending way too much $$$$ on clothes, etc. She thinks we are making way too much of a fuss of this and that we need to let her run her life how she see's fit. So with that said there's not much we can do about her debt situation as the moment. We've tried talking budgets with her and she has no desire to do that either.

Hi happymom

Well, if she thinks you need to let her run her life how she sees fit, why did she want to involve you in the proposed car loan? Involving your parents as guarantors for a loan is not running your life how you see fit!

I hope I'm wrong, but I think she's at the start of the slippery slope into the mire that so many other people are struggling to get out of.

I appreciate that some people of her age don't think their parents know anything, want to be free of what they see as parental interference - what a pity she couldn't hear what some of the young people on this thread have already said. I know she wouldn't read it even if you printed it out! Oh dear.

I assume you haven't signed the guarantee as she wanted?

With best wishes to you

Aunty Margaret

bluep

My cousin and his wife bought a new car on finance as he'd got a new job and had never bought anything like it. One week later he confessed to me that it was a complete mistake and it had depreciated the moment they drove it off the forecourt and he didn;t think they could really afford the £300+ payments each month even though he was earning good money. 6 months down the line and they have looked into selling it and trying to pay off the finance loan but worked out they'd still end up owing 3k.

When we were tempted with a similar situation recently, I am really glad we stopped ourselves and bought a car with cash that we had even if it was a bit of an old banger!

nearlyrich

My two teenagers have old but paid for cars that they can afford to run on their earnings from part time jobs whilst studying, running costs such as petrol, insurance etc.

I wouldn't want to help them to get into debt for things like cars, it's bad enought having student loans.

I agree that you have done the right thing here but you are probably viewed at the moment as the worst parents ever by a certain young lady. She will get over it!

happymom_2

No new car yet guys and the supposedly good deal on Saturns is over tomorrow!!!
Happy 4th!!!!
Sincerely, ~happymom~