19 year old daughter in debt

happymom_2

Daughter wants us to co-sign on a brand new car and we think she owes about $5,000 or less on her credid card. She won't tell us the actual amount, feels it her business and not ours to know. We told her we wouldn't co-sign untill the card is paid off and now she's not talking to us. I feel we made the right decision. Has anyone else been thru this? Would love to know if we did the right thing. Thank you. Happymom!!!!

Xbigman

You have done totally the right thing. If your daughter already has credit card debts and can't get a loan on her own, you would be mad to help her further into debt.

The bad news is that you will probably need to wait about 15 years for her to thank you for it. Thats about the usual time it takes children to realize their parents were right. Well, sometimes right.
Regards




X

nelly_2

Course you right and an example of good parenting too. If she only owes a tenner on the card she'd say so right away. At 19 shes not lived in the real world long enough I know I hadent at that age. Stick to your guns and enjoy the peace and quiet of her not talking cos it wont last

Innys

If more people took your approach, happymom, they'd be fewer candidates for shows like "Spendaholics" - which has to be a good thing, doesn't it?

Tough love, you can't beat it...

carly

Of course you are absolutely right. You will not be helping her by encouraging her into more debt. On another note, if she is asking you to co -sign then it IS your business to know how much she owes elsewhere. Any other lender would demand this information.

Penny-Pincher!!

Hi Happymom

You did the right thing!

If she feels it is her business-why is she involving you in "her business" by asking you to co-sign a loan

She has only been able to get credit since age 18, so at 19 with this much debt already is not a good sign. Does she work or at college etc? It may seem harsh on her, but she needs to learn. I wouldnt even ask my folks to co-sign anything now and Im 30 with means of paying back :eek:

Stay firm!

Penny-Pincher!!
XXX

rchddap1

100% agree with the other posts. If she wants you to co-sign then you do need to know her full situation. At the end of the day if she can't pay the money back they will then come to you. So you need to know what you're getting yourself into.

I firmly believe that your credit is your own, and your debt is your own. Neither I , nor my partner would get credit for our respective families, no matter what it was they wanted the money for.

I'm afraid that she needs to learn that debt is not a good thing and that when you get a loan, or use a credit card you can pay dearly for it.

sophiedb

I'll join in the round of applause too! I have a couple of cousins who are getting themselves in similar strife - one is £10k in debt at 21 years old (despite being still at uni), partly courtesy of his spendaholic partner's fabulous idea of a joint car loan (cousin cannot drive) but mostly his own complete lack of money sense. Best to nip it in the bud, even if she won't speak to you!!

margaretclare

I agree with all the others. Why does a 19-yr old have to have a NEW car? wouldn't an old banger do just as well?

I agree, if she's asking you to be a guarantor of this proposed car loan, that means you're putting your own financial reputation on the line. If she defaults then the debt devolves on to you. And she says it's not your business!!

Aunty Margaret

jockettuk

only last week in the papers a dad was saying his daughter owed him £40,000 and that he might lose his home and he has to put his retirement on hold.. The daughter she couldnt care less of course as she only cares for herself.. if he had put a stop to it sooner then they might be friends now..

lionelflare

Please do not let her have this loan, I had a few years where all i did was spend spend spend, I always paid the minimum payments so the CC companies were more than happy to keep giving me more. I have finally realised what I could have done with the amount of interest I have paid over the last 9 years. its enough to have bought more than 1 new car