Do a lot of young people lack interpersonal skills in the workplace and life in general now?

Andy_L

"Do a lot of young people lack interpersonal skills in the workplace and life in general now?"

I'd suggest that that sentence has validity if you take out the word "young" 

Uriziel

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

EnPointe

Uriziel said:

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

Indeed it is 'red flag' workplace behaviours and  it's likely to backfire on you  , doubly so  if any  of the young workers are under 18 

zagfles

Uriziel said:

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

We were actually told the opposite at our old place by a manager a few years ago. He'd noticed the young staff members all tended to go to the canteen together and share a table, and same with the older staff, there was no social intermingling between the younger and older staff.  

Anyway he "suggested" we try intermingling at lunchtime. Nobody wanted to but there was a feeling we had to try. It lasted a few days, and was actually quite interesting at first. But generally after exhausting common ground conversations the young ones would tend to talk among themselves about xbox games etc and the old ones about pensions, grandkids, travel etc. It went back to how it was before within a week   

Well, almost. One of the young women decided she preferred to dine with the older guys as we had some really interesting conversations on travel and she was sick of the sanctimonious harassment she was getting off a couple of the other youngsters about the environmental impact of travel etc! 

Vectis

Uriziel said:

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

Wow, heaven forbid that people ask each other how they are and be generally sociable.

Just that someone thinks it's 'harassment and extremely concerning and serious' that one person talks to another is one of the oddest comments I've heard recently.

EnPointe

Vectis said:

Uriziel said:

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

Wow, heaven forbid that people ask each other how they are and be generally sociable.

Just that someone thinks it's 'harassment and extremely concerning and serious' that one person talks to another is one of the oddest comments I've heard recently.

looks like you  need some SRI updating -   your nosyness and misplaced familiarity  will land you in hot water 

Myci85

Vectis said:

Uriziel said:

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

Wow, heaven forbid that people ask each other how they are and be generally sociable.

Just that someone thinks it's 'harassment and extremely concerning and serious' that one person talks to another is one of the oddest comments I've heard recently.

I'm with you here. For a lot of people, you spend more time with your colleagues than anyone else, and getting along with them and being able to show an interest in each other's lives makes a workplace a far happier place to be. Most of the jobs I've been content in have not been so because of the job itself, but because I was working with people who I genuinely enjoyed spending time with.

If the PC way of treating colleagues these days is to show zero interest in them as a person, and speak only when it is necessary for the functioning of the workplace, for fear of someone misconstruing your intentions, that sounds like a very lonely way to spend your days. 

zagfles

Myci85 said:

Vectis said:

Uriziel said:

Part of your message states that you are asking them about their weekend and whatnot. No offence but if an employee does not want to be social with you they do not have to. If you are expecting employees to be your "mates" when they clearly do not want to that is harassment and extremely concerning and serious. I suggest you rethink your behaviour. Unless your employees are not doing duties that are part of their job spec leave them alone please.

Wow, heaven forbid that people ask each other how they are and be generally sociable.

Just that someone thinks it's 'harassment and extremely concerning and serious' that one person talks to another is one of the oddest comments I've heard recently.

I'm with you here. For a lot of people, you spend more time with your colleagues than anyone else, and getting along with them and being able to show an interest in each other's lives makes a workplace a far happier place to be. Most of the jobs I've been content in have not been so because of the job itself, but because I was working with people who I genuinely enjoyed spending time with.

If the PC way of treating colleagues these days is to show zero interest in them as a person, and speak only when it is necessary for the functioning of the workplace, for fear of someone misconstruing your intentions, that sounds like a very lonely way to spend your days. 

Indeed. No wonder there are so many people with mental health issues these days. I'm really lucky I've worked in workplaces where people do care and look out for each other, and not had to walk on eggshells when interacting with colleagues.

Obviously some people are reluctant to open up too much but it's pretty obvious to anyone with any emotional intelligence where to draw the line. Anyone who can't handle "Good morning, did you have a good weekend" perhaps should consider seeing a therapist. A simple yes or it was ok would suffice, no need for detail. 

EnPointe

Myci85 said:

I'm with you here. For a lot of people, you spend more time with your colleagues than anyone else, and getting along with them and being able to show an interest in each other's lives makes a workplace a far happier place to be. Most of the jobs I've been content in have not been so because of the job itself, but because I was working with people who I genuinely enjoyed spending time with.

If the PC way of treating colleagues these days is to show zero interest in them as a person, and speak only when it is necessary for the functioning of the workplace, for fear of someone misconstruing your intentions, that sounds like a very lonely way to spend your days. 

 You are , frankly, a Fantasist . 

 The fact you  have reacted like this suggests to me,as it would to many others who are or have been TU reps, Trainers  or Supervisors,  that you  feel that you are entitled to the friendship of your colleagues and feel that your parasocial interest  in them  ought to be  reciprocated and normalised. 

The fact you  use  the term 'PC'   dismiss the very basic tenets  of  Safe , respectful and includsive workplaces is a significant red flag.   

Myci85

EnPointe said:

Myci85 said:

I'm with you here. For a lot of people, you spend more time with your colleagues than anyone else, and getting along with them and being able to show an interest in each other's lives makes a workplace a far happier place to be. Most of the jobs I've been content in have not been so because of the job itself, but because I was working with people who I genuinely enjoyed spending time with.

If the PC way of treating colleagues these days is to show zero interest in them as a person, and speak only when it is necessary for the functioning of the workplace, for fear of someone misconstruing your intentions, that sounds like a very lonely way to spend your days. 

 You are , frankly, a Fantasist . 

 The fact you  have reacted like this suggests to me,as it would to many others who are or have been TU reps, Trainers  or Supervisors,  that you  feel that you are entitled to the friendship of your colleagues and feel that your parasocial interest  in them  ought to be  reciprocated and normalised. 

The fact you  use  the term 'PC'   dismiss the very basic tenets  of  Safe , respectful and includsive workplaces is a significant red flag.   

Not a fantasist, no red flags (I hate how much that term is bandied around these days but that probably is also a 'red flag'), I just appreciate a workplace that feels like a welcoming place where people enjoy spending time.

I don't feel 'entitled to the friendship of my colleagues', but I'm not going to treat them like strangers. There is a very big difference between showing an interest in someone as a person, and forcing yourself on someone inappropriately. We'll have a society where it is deemed inappropriate for kids to make friends at school before long.