Things to know before becoming an executor

Stripey_Tiger

I've been asked by my dad whether I am willing to be an executor to his will, jointly with my sibling. It makes sense for us to do this, but before I say yes, I would be interested to know other people who have been an executor wish they had known beforehand. Is there anything I should be mindful of? Is there anything in particular I should emphasise needs to be clear in the writing of the will? I am nervous partly because my mum's will was very vague, and this created some difficulties in dividing things up fairly, which is really the last thing you want to have to deal with while grieving.

BikingBud

Stripey_Tiger said:

I've been asked by my dad whether I am willing to be an executor to his will, jointly with my sibling. It makes sense for us to do this, but before I say yes, I would be interested to know other people who have been an executor wish they had known beforehand. Is there anything I should be mindful of? Is there anything in particular I should emphasise needs to be clear in the writing of the will? I am nervous partly because my mum's will was very vague, and this created some difficulties in dividing things up fairly, which is really the last thing you want to have to deal with while grieving.

You might wish to discuss with your father how he wishes his estate to be divided so that you understand his wishes. The deceased could quite deliberately have a very unfair will, the obligation of the executor is to enact that will, you should not seek to unpick that or try to divide things fairly. 

maman

I've been an executor twice but both were simple wills and the other executor was my brother. 

By simple, I mean there was property to sell and money to be distributed but no IHT or shares, few beneficiaries and noone likely to contest. My brother and I get on well and easily found a division of tasks that suited us.

We had sight of the wills beforehand so knew there would be no shocks like someone cut out who might have expected a legacy or a division of the inheritance that anyone might think unfair. 

In these circumstances, I'd willingly take the role on again. 

RAS

Ask dad who he using to write the will? If it is a will writer, I'd strongly advise he sees a solicitor to get a new will written. If it was the people who wrote mum's will, insist that he uses a solicitor, or you'll refuse to execute.

Stripey_Tiger

RAS said:

Ask dad who he using to write the will? If it is a will writer, I'd strongly advise he sees a solicitor to get a new will written. If it was the people who wrote mum's will, insist that he uses a solicitor, or you'll refuse to execute.

Thanks, this is helpful. I believe it's a solicitor but will check. Very much doubt it will be the same people who wrote my mum's will as they were divorced and she died over 20 years ago, but I will check that too.

Stripey_Tiger

maman said:

I've been an executor twice but both were simple wills and the other executor was my brother. 

By simple, I mean there was property to sell and money to be distributed but no IHT or shares, few beneficiaries and noone likely to contest. My brother and I get on well and easily found a division of tasks that suited us.

We had sight of the wills beforehand so knew there would be no shocks like someone cut out who might have expected a legacy or a division of the inheritance that anyone might think unfair. 

In these circumstances, I'd willingly take the role on again. 

Thank you, this is helpful. My dad has always been somewhat private about his finances so I have very little idea of what will be in the will, other than the obvious things like his house. It will be a little bit complicated by the fact that he owns a house with his wife who has her own (adult) children, and things will need to be split between the two families, with plans in place depending on which of them dies first. I will definitely talk to my dad about making sure my sibling and I have sight of everything in advance.

Hoenir

Executorship can be time consuming. Get to your Dad to document everything well. Tidy up paperwork etc to keep only what's relevant. 

RAS

The blended family situation definitely complicates things.

In unblended families, the first spouse to die usually leaves everything to the survivor for IHT purposes, often with an IPDI trust to ensure that their biological children will inherit, often long term, half the property owned by both spouses. Otherwise if the survivor remarries, everything can go to their new spouse.  

In blended families, severing the tenancy and each parent leaving an IPDI trust in favour of their biological children usually ensures that all the children inherit something.

Dad needs to understand that a mirror will does not protect any inheritance he wants to leave you and your siblings if his wife changes her will, or from her remarriage (which invalidates prior wills).

DigForVictory

Definitely ask to see the Will & know where it is stored. Check on Powers of Attorney? Where the pension is pointed (unless he's already in receipt)? Where any life insurance policies are to pay out? Does the Will cover the blended family & might it be easier if he were to revisit his soliciitor and have the Will revised for greater clarity? 
I appreciate he's a private soul on some matters but sight of his bank account & normal finances - who's he with for gas elec water broadband etc & in whose name - may be useful to be aware of. (You could ease him through a money makeover?!)  Also has he an accountant? (They can be very useful if they are reliably provided with the right infromation.)
Well doen him asking, well done you checking! May it not be needed for some time & smooth when it is.

Stripey_Tiger

BikingBud said:

Stripey_Tiger said:

I've been asked by my dad whether I am willing to be an executor to his will, jointly with my sibling. It makes sense for us to do this, but before I say yes, I would be interested to know other people who have been an executor wish they had known beforehand. Is there anything I should be mindful of? Is there anything in particular I should emphasise needs to be clear in the writing of the will? I am nervous partly because my mum's will was very vague, and this created some difficulties in dividing things up fairly, which is really the last thing you want to have to deal with while grieving.

You might wish to discuss with your father how he wishes his estate to be divided so that you understand his wishes. The deceased could quite deliberately have a very unfair will, the obligation of the executor is to enact that will, you should not seek to unpick that or try to divide things fairly. 

Thank you, yes I will definitely talk to him about his wishes and making sure they're expressed clearly. I would never try and unpick his decisions. The issue with my mum's will was, as far as I know (I was young at the time and I never saw it myself), she pretty much appointed executors and that was it - she left no instructions on how to divide things up, so the executors had free rein to do whatever they wanted.

Stripey_Tiger

RAS said:

The blended family situation definitely complicates things.

In unblended families, the first spouse to die usually leaves everything to the survivor for IHT purposes, often with an IPDI trust to ensure that their biological children will inherit, often long term, half the property owned by both spouses. Otherwise if the survivor remarries, everything can go to their new spouse.  

In blended families, severing the tenancy and each parent leaving an IPDI trust in favour of their biological children usually ensures that all the children inherit something.

Dad needs to understand that a mirror will does not protect any inheritance he wants to leave you and your siblings if his wife changes her will, or from her remarriage (which invalidates prior wills).

Thank you, I really appreciate you explaining this. I don't think my stepmother would try to disinherit me but it's always better to have this stuff set up legally rather than rely on trust. And I have no real relationship with her children (we were all adults when they married) so the thought of having to work with them to divide things up when the second spouse dies would make me nervous if everything wasn't set in stone.