need some advice, how to remove someone!

kronas

hi all, in a complicated and long story the whole family has issues with my brother, hes your typical loungy, waste of space, wants everything handed to him couch potato, constantly take take takes and never gives back or even has the decency to provide! so in esscence we all want him out, police wont do anything and he wont leave, he seems intent on selling the house as he sees no way the family can get by (yes he cant handle money and has irresponsibly used it) so my quandary is how can i get him out ? he is 28/29, he is also affecting my health in a big way aswell as the rest of the familys!

floss2

kronas wrote: »

he seems intent on selling the house

Hi Kronas,

Could you give us a bit more info? Is the house his to sell? Do you & your family live with him or does he live with you? Does he have any income?

Thanks, Floss x

kronas

floss2 wrote: »

Hi Kronas,

Could you give us a bit more info? Is the house his to sell? Do you & your family live with him or does he live with you? Does he have any income?

Thanks, Floss x

hes on JSA, he lives with me, my sister, our dad and grandmother.

kronas

floss2 wrote: »

Hi Kronas,

Could you give us a bit more info? Is the house his to sell? Do you & your family live with him or does he live with you? Does he have any income?

Thanks, Floss x

hes on JSA, house is my dad's, he lives with me, my sister, our dad and grandmother.

izoomzoom

kronas wrote: »

he seems intent on selling the house !

Who wants to sell the house - brother or dad ??

floss2

I would think that if the house is in your dad's name, your brother cannot force a sale. Does he have any reason for not working? What do you mean "he sees no way the family can get by"? Do you, your dad & your sister work?

tanith

Kronas if the house either belongs to or is rented in your Dads name then all you have to do is stick together , give your brother an ultimatum either he shapes up and contributes to your family or he ships out... give him a couple of weeks and then change the locks while he is out... pack up his stuff and ask him to collect it...

Its hard but he's a big boy now and needs to stand on his own two feet...

kronas

tanith wrote: »

Kronas if the house either belongs to or is rented in your Dads name then all you have to do is stick together , give your brother an ultimatum either he shapes up and contributes to your family or he ships out... give him a couple of weeks and then change the locks while he is out... pack up his stuff and ask him to collect it...

Its hard but he's a big boy now and needs to stand on his own two feet...

we have said it before but he wont listen, hes antisocial, wants to be spoonfed, he needs to realise life is harder than sitting around looking for handouts, you have to earn your crust, you owe life, it doesent owe you

floss2 wrote: »

I would think that if the house is in your dad's name, your brother cannot force a sale. Does he have any reason for not working? What do you mean "he sees no way the family can get by"? Do you, your dad & your sister work?

my dad and myself have health issues, they stop us from working, my grandmother is old and unfortunately my sister has to look after her, me, and my dad.he means financially we are not secure income wise, which is true, however i did say that benifits are not a long term solution for the both of us and that he being able to work he should, but ofcourse the old 'no vacancies' line comes out of his mouth, he has been out of work for more than a year, scrounges, demands, intimidates everyone. things have changed recently with the death of my mother, he was not really bothered or interested at all in his mothers health, he just said 'she will be alright' long story as i said....

izoomzoom wrote: »

Who wants to sell the house - brother or dad ??

brother not my dad.

Loretta

I would say that your income is secure or could be. You have told him what you think and he hasn't listened, on to stage 2!

Of course he is going to fight you all the way he is on to a good thing, these sort of people always say that you couldn't manage without him.

Get some advice, or put more details on here and someone will be able to advise you. Tell us ages, what all your health problems are, are they long term or may any of you be alright in a while?

Is grandmother getting all she is entitiled to, are you all getting everything available. With this nuisance of a brother sticking his oar in it is prbably making everything difficult to manage and think things through.

It sounds as if your brother thinks if the house is sold he may get a lump sum, I should make it quite clear that whether the house is sold or not that will not happen.

Give us more details, I am sure something can be done to make life easier.

If you know exactly what your position is you are in a much stronger position to deal with idle brother

D4WNO

Surely it's none of your brothers business whether the house is sold or not if it belongs to your father? You would probably have more money to go round the rest of the family if he moved out, it's amazing how much 1 person costs in bills etc. I dont imagine he does his own food shopping each week judging my his character description that you have given us?

Maybe the CAB can advise? Another thing to check on is to ensure that you are all receiving the illness benefits that you should be along with your grandmother, does she receive anything additional due to age? (Someone else can probably advise on what you should be entitled to)

Your dad is more than entitled to kick him out. Could you have the locks changed whilst he is out at his fortnightly visit to the Job Centre to sign on??

floss2

Sorry for your loss.

Just a thought - did your mum leave a will? If not, can I assume your brother has ben left a share of the family home - is he trying to force a sale to recover the value of his share? If this is so, I would suggest you contact a solicitor & arrange for a half-hour free session to clarify whether this can be done - especially bearing in mind your grandmother's age & frailty and you & your dad's illnesses.

Age Concern will be able to advise on benefits for your grandmother, and also may be able to give advice for any other support for her & her carer (your sister).

:grouphug:

Floss x