Private pension nominees versus wife

Midnightstar22

Hi I am new to the forum so apologies if this has been covered but I couldn’t find what I was looking for. 

I am an older woman about to marry my lovely man. The question I have is, he has a private pension and after his divorce he put his 2 children down as equal shares upon his death. Once we are married he has stated that once he dies he wants everything going to his children which I have no problem with BUT, I came out of a long abusive marriage, apart of the abuse was financial ruin. We had two children together and I on my own have got them through university and a masters. I have had  3 jobs and work for the NHS. Now as we know they do not pay well and I only started with them 8 years ago. So my pension is nothing. My husband to be’s children have huge life savings pensions and houses. 

If my loved one was to pass before me , (whom is 8 years older than me) who would inherit his pension? Me his wife or his children who are the nominees? I have no inheritance coming my way either. Just worried about my old age. My hubby to be has said we need to make wills so everything goes to them but he ensures me that I will be looking after? He isn’t some millionaire by the way! I just want to know I have a pension or monies to keep me going. Thanks. 

swingaloo

Are there properties involved and do either of you have savings? Where will you live?

DE_612183

normally with a pension you can nominate a beneficiary - however if not nominated it goes to the estate.

What type of pension is it - Private?

DRS1

You will need more detail on his pension to get an answer to the pension question.  Is it a personal pension scheme like a SIPP or is it an occupational pension scheme set up by his employer?  If the latter is it a defined benefit scheme or defined contribution?

You may find that being his spouse gives you benefits under the pension scheme if you become a surviving spouse especially if it is a defined benefit occupational pension scheme.

Otherwise the trustees of the scheme or whoever administers it may simply look at the nomination forms and say yes we pay them.  Second marriages do present problems and make the trustees job more difficult (unless the member has written in saying I am getting married but that changes nothing and my kids should still get the death benefits) but it is not like a will - the marriage does not nullify the nomination.  The trustees may still ignore it though and pay out to the surviving spouse if you can make a good case for the money going to you and not his kids.

Albermarle

Assuming this is a DC ( Defined Contribution) pension, it does not legally belong to him, but is held in trust by the pension provider.
These Trustees have the power to leave any unused pension pot on death to who they like ( in theory anyway). However by nominating his two children as beneficiaries, he has indicated to the Trustees how he would like the money to be distributed. Normally the Trustees will follow these instructions, but if they can see that there may be some dispute, or there is a complicated family structure, and/or some one maybe left in financial difficulty, they can investigate further before finally allocating the money.
Because the pension pot is held in trust it does not form part of the estate, so is not included in the will. 

From what you have said the situation generally looks a bit one sided. 
He says you need to write wills but that everything should go to them.
You are right to wonder about your future ( and your children's) especially as you are getting married.

Midnightstar22

swingaloo said:

Are there properties involved and do either of you have savings? Where will you live?

he has said that in the will, he will state that I can stay in our home until I die, and only then will his children inherit the house. Thanks

Cressida100

How old are you if you don't mind me asking? 

swingaloo

Im happy to be wrong about this but there seem to be a few red flags here.

I would have thought that making a will for a married couple was a joint thing but you say he is telling you what he will be doing rather than discussing it jointly.
You say he will ensure you are looked after if he dies but then you put a ? at the end of the sentence. Do you have any doubt about that statement?

It may be slightly personal to ask these questions but the forum is completely anonymous.
Will you be living in his property? You mention 'our home' but who owns the property?
Do you have a home of your own now? Will you be investing in the property you are going to live in? If so, are your children being considered?
What age are you both?
Do you get on with his children, if you end up living in what they consider their inheritance after he dies will they be ok with you. More to the point, will you be happy with this?

Nomunnofun1

swingaloo said:

Im happy to be wrong about this but there seem to be a few red flags here.

I would have thought that making a will for a married couple was a joint thing but you say he is telling you what he will be doing rather than discussing it jointly.
You say he will ensure you are looked after if he dies but then you put a ? at the end of the sentence. Do you have any doubt about that statement?

It may be slightly personal to ask these questions but the forum is completely anonymous.
Will you be living in his property? You mention 'our home' but who owns the property?
Do you have a home of your own now? Will you be investing in the property you are going to live in? If so, are your children being considered?
What age are you both?
Do you get on with his children, if you end up living in what they consider their inheritance after he dies will they be ok with you. More to the point, will you be happy with this?

It is personal but hard to disagree with that. 

In particular 

‘My hubby to be has said we need to make wills to ensure everything goes to them’ 

would be of concern. 

sheramber

You say you need to know you will have a pension but if you hadn’t met him and were single until you retire you would only have your NHS pension and whatever state pension you were entitled to.

If you continue to live in the house after his death will you be able to pay the bills and any maintenance required.?

You need to sit down with your husband to be and discuss your concerns with him  before you marry him. 

You both need to be  clear what will happen and be happy with the arrangements. 

theoretica

But on the other hand, what is your plan for later life if you do not marry - would you be any worse off for having been married, but inheriting nothing?  You might, for instance, give up a cheap house and living situation to move into his house so that in addition to a life interest in the marital home you would face higher living expenses, and it would be in both your and the children's interest that there is enough money to keep the property well maintained.