Mortgage Free by 50???

hatch_five

Well yesterday was mentally draining! I checked my emails about 10am and found I had a message from my Dad at 6am to say not to ring  to wish Mum Happy Mother’s Day as they had just got back from A&E and were off to bed. Mum has Parkinsons and falls, a lot, on Saturday night she fell and grabbed my Dad just as he was carrying a full kettle of boiling water to make a cup of tea. They both went down and got covered with boiling water- Mum scalding one side of her and her stomach and Dad getting the brunt of it over his left arm. Living in the middle of no where, they rang for a taxi to go to A&E that managed to get lost for half and hour and then when they finally got to the hospital they were there for six hours and it looks like they will be referred to the specialist burns unit at Pinderfields because Dad’s scald is the worst sort!

Me and my brother tried to persuade them to sell up their farm house in the middle of no where and move to a nice bungalow in the next village over from me about three years ago, so I could get to them in an emergency (its currently either a two hour bus ride each way to their house, or a forty minute taxi ride at £30 each way so not really easy to get to if you don't drive), but they dug their heels in and refused to even consider moving, Mum is now so ill so that’s not really an option any more and as they don’t drive either, have one bus every two hours and live up a road that no one can find them I dread to think what would happen if it was a more serious incident.

I rang Dad last night and we had a good chat, he was at least open to the possibility that Mum might need a carer or even residential care at some point in the future, but I don’t think they are quite in the place to go fully down that road yet. On the plus side, I did explain to him about ‘What Three Words’ and I found out the location for their front gate which he is going to put by the phone so when they ring to get picked up by a taxi, there is at least a chance the taxi will find them and not get lost! We went through all this stress of elderly parents with OH’s mum about eight or nine years back and now its my parents turn, the irony being I remember how frustrated my Mum got with my Nan when she was having falls etc. of course now its Mum and Dad’s turn, they have completely forgotten all the advice they gave to their parents…

Muddy_Walker

oh bless you!!! I hope they are both a bit better now. What a nasty shock xxx

hatch_five

Muddy_Walker said:

oh bless you!!! I hope they are both a bit better now. What a nasty shock xxx

Thanks, sadly not. Both have caught infections, Mum worse than Dad and both have been admitted to Pinderfields burns unit. Mum will be in a couple of weeks and Dad needs skin grafts and then a cast on his arm (no idea how he is going to care for Mum one handed when she gets out). He thinks he will be in a couple of days, me and my brother think at least a week. Luckily Dad managed to get their dogs into kennels last night so that's one job sorted, but I think we are going to need to arrange some sort of carers at least in the short term until Dad has the use of both arms again. 

vampirotoothus

Morning, what a horrible situation for you all. Sending you best wishes. V x

Humdinger1

Sending love @hatch_five.  We are all here cheering you on Humdinger xx

hatch_five

Does it ever end? Mum and Dad are going into surgery today for skin grafts, then this morning OH complained about extreme pain in her mouth where her wisdom tooth is. As she doesn’t have a dentist, and a severe phobia of them she hasn’t been near one in twenty years. After ringing several practices I managed to get her an emergency appointment with a private dentist and then went with her to stop her having a panic attack (luckily my boss is really nice about these things). The dentist was really good and sorted it out with minimal fuss, but the £150 I had managed to save back up in the emergency fund after the electrician’s bill has all gone again so we are back to square one! Its what it there for and it didn’t have to go on the credit card, but it feels like we constantly take one step forward and two back. So far this year we have had an emergency electrician, cat run over and killed, mum and dad getting scalded and needing specialist burns treatment and now OH’s tooth…and its only April! I just seem to spend all my time sorting everyone else out at the moment- I know its what being a responsible adult is all about, but just once I’d like a more adulty-adult who could sort it out for me…

Cara_

You are certainly going through a difficult time. 

Your poor mum and dad - I hope they are home soon and that their burns heal quickly.

I'm glad the dentist could sort out your OHs tooth and that you were able to be there for her.

I hope things become easier for you in the coming weeks.

hatch_five

Cara_ said:

You are certainly going through a difficult time. 

Your poor mum and dad - I hope they are home soon and that their burns heal quickly.

I'm glad the dentist could sort out your OHs tooth and that you were able to be there for her.

I hope things become easier for you in the coming weeks.

Thanks, yesterday was a little trying! Looks like the surgery for Mum and Dad went well though, the sun is shining in through my office window and I am finishing for Easter tomorrow so feeling a lot more positive today. I am ready for a week not having to get up early, spending time with the family and maybe having a few beers with friends in the garden if the weather holds next week.

Muddy_Walker

Sorry I haven’t posted for a bit real life has been smacking me in the face!
how are you all today?

hatch_five

This year can do one! Noticed our house rabbit was off his food on Thursday. Rabbits are prone to a thing called GI Stasis, which is a bit like colic in horses so we started him on the high fibre critical care formula we had in for this. He was no better on Friday so I rushed him to the emergency vet at 11pm on Friday night. She checked him over and said his gut seemed fine, keep giving him the critical care formula and come back if there was no improvement. By Saturday evening there was no improvement and I got him out of his hutch to syringe feed him some more of the formula when he had a massive heart attack, leapt out of my lap and was dead by the time he hit the floor- with 12 year old DS seeing everything. I took him straight back to the emergency vet and they confirmed he was dead. Missing my little rabbity friend so much- there is a big gap in the living room where his hutch was and I keep expecting him to come up for nose rubs and ear massages. I loved this little guy:

Added to all that I had to max out my credit card, borrow some money from OH out of the housekeeping and take out a £100 overdraft to cover the vet’s bills as the emergency fund had already been used this month. I don’t begrudge spending the money at all as if there was a chance they could have saved him, I would have spent anything, but it does put us in a very precarious position and I am feeling completely battered by life at the moment. I got paid today and by paring the budget to the absolute bare bones (no haircut, no luxuries, cut the monthly grocery shop to the very bare minimum) I have managed to give OH her housekeeping money back and put £50 back in the emergency fund just so we have something as a buffer. Going to try and find a few things to eBay this month just to try and keep our heads a bit above the water but really not in the right headspace at this exact moment. I got on with repairing the log store yesterday because I get through things best by being practical and keeping my hands and mind busy.

On a bit of positive news, Dad is home from the hospital and Mum is due to be released to a nursing home for a couple of weeks tomorrow before she too can go home and both have recovered well from the skin grafts and had the dressings removed now, so at least that’s one thing I can stop worrying about for a bit.