Can’t afford to pay half the mortgage and my rent

DFB35

Would really appreciate some advice, will try to stick to the facts with no emotional stuff. 

Have been married nearly 20 years, two kids older one lives independently, younger will be leaving in the summer (going to college in a different town and staying with relatives this was already pre arranged before relationship breakdown as oldest did the same). 

Own house which Zoopla values between 516- 570k, it states 543k with high confidence. We have a mortgage totalling 248k
In theory we are lucky to both have enough equity to start again and get our own properties. We both earn similar amounts the only issue we might have to buy in an area slightly further out as prices are high here. But again no problem as our child will stay elsewhere during the week for college. 

Problem - husband refuses to move out, refuses to sell the house for various reasons given. He says cannot really afford to buy me out without help from his parent. As it stands we are in separate rooms, not talking and the atmosphere is horrendous. I have mental health issues and it’s affecting my work, I’m sorry I know I said I will take emotion out of it!
I have had solicitor advice and they said not to move out. But I cannot bear this much longer and planning to move out once the child leaves in the summer (so still a very long way to go). As solicitor explained to me as he refuses to sell I will have to take him to court at 2k-5k each time (they said maximum 3 times and then the judge will decide).  Plus the solicitor fees were quoted at 3-5k plus vat minimum. 
When I move out I won’t be able to pay half of my mortgage on the house I no longer live in as I will have rent and bills to pay. I’m only thinking of renting 1 bedroom with a sofa bed so our child can come and visit at the weekend. 

What will happen to my rights in regards to the equity in the house? He might never sell it but similarly once I’m out I will refuse to remove my name from it unless I have half the equity (perhaps minus the years I’ve not paid?)

fatbelly

Jointly owned property. The default setting is a 50/50 split.

Move out and get on with your life. What your husband does is up to him. Yes it could drag on before the issue of the house is settled but there are many more aspects of your life that you could take control of.

Your solicitor's advice wasn't helpful btw

RAS

Do look at wikivorce, useful advice without solicitors. 

You might want to consider severing the tenancy and getting a new will written, for example.

DFB35

Thank you so much I will check out the website now 

tacpot12

As far as my understanding goes, if you move out but don't pay the mortgage and he pays it all, then when/if the house is sold, you would recieve half of the value, unless there is a court order that varies this. This would very unfair on him, so you have a lot of power if you don't pay. If I were you, I would be pointing this out to him, and indicate that you will refuse to pay anything.

However there is a risk that he can't pay all the mortgage, and pays a bit less, and this results in a repossesion which will affect your credit record if the debt isn't paid with 30 days of the court order that settled the possession claim by the lender. In an ideal world you would check with the mortgage lender on the stae of the account (you can problem ask for a copy statement to be sent you annually) and save up the money needed to clear any shortfall - you would remain liable for the morgage. 

As per RAS's post. You also need to consider what would happen if you died. This will depend on how the house is owned. It is more likely, as you are married, that the house is owned as a joint tenancy. This means that if you die, your husband will own 100% of the equity in the house. (It will pass to him automatically and your Will cannot change this while the house is owned as a Joint Tenancy. You can 'severe' the tenancy by converting it to be owned as Tenants-in-Common. This means that your Will can leave your equity in the house to anyone, including your sons, and there inheritance tax benefits to leaving your home to your children. This link tells you how to do it: Joint property ownership: Change from joint tenants to tenants in common - GOV.UK (www.gov.uk)

Note that if you do severe the joint tenancy, you are only entitled to half the equity in the house. The other half will belong to your husband, and would fall into his estate if he died. If he dies intestest, and you are still married, you would inherit his equity. If you had died, your sons would inherit his equity (having also possibly inherited your equity). If he leave a Will, it's up to him how he leaves his half of the equity. It is likely that his Executors will sell the house so finalise the estate.  

You can potential save solicitors fees on the court action for force your husband to sell the house - if the paperwork for the 2-3 court visits doesn't change, you don't necessarily need the solicitor to do anything. If you want a solicitor to manage your case for you and do all the work that you could do, you will pay a lot. 

MeteredOut

Small side note: don't rely on Zoopla alone for the house valuation - it can be out by quite a bit. Any other recent local sales for similar houses would give a better indication of value.

Any chance you get an estate agent out to get a valuation?

SootySweep1

Hi
Could your husband afford to pay the full mortgage & all the bills if you moved out ?

Jen

DFB35

The rent and mortgage are very similar amounts so we would be pretty much even if he paid the whole mortgage and I pay my rent only. And we earn about the same. 

We had a very good talk tonight, I did indicate my intention to move out and him taking over the mortgage. He seems to have this massive attachment to the house, I don’t know why but he’s desperate to stay and keep it. 

I don’t know if it’s fair that I have to rent but he can stay in family home… it’s mad as when our child goes to college and then uni he will be rattling around it on his own. But he seems very happy at the prospect even though so far I’ve been the one doing much of the maintenance for example… garden, weeding the drive, cleaning, painting etc. god knows how he will maintain it. 

There was a small glimmer of hope of beginning of reconciliation but that’s gone now. It’s obvious he wants to stay in this house above all else. 

thegreenone

If that's his stance, he has to buy you out and take you off the mortgage and deeds completely. 

Ask an EA to give a proper valuation. It might also be good to engage an independent RICS surveyor for a separate valuation (may be good if you go for divorce). As above, don't rely on Zoopla. 

Get the valuations and put the ball back in his court, with a time limit for a decision.  He can't have his cake, eat it and leave you in a worse position. 

Stay strong, dig deep and you will get through this with what you are entitled to 

DFB35

Someone advised to me that as I own half of the house he has to pay me rent on my half. So in a way that would cover the whole mortgage amount (half his and half as rent to me?)
Does that make sense?
I kind of accepted the situation now… especially if I don’t have to pay half my mortgage plus my new rent which I was most worried about. 

I just hope it doesn’t affect my equity in the house or the equity I’ve build up so far 

Stateofart

Don't move out.  As soon as you do, he will put the brakes on HARD!!