Divorce - amicable, each have seperate property, assets, etc - clean Break?

mojo293

So, my wife and I separated in 2022. We had been together and co-habiting since 1998, then married in 2018. We have one son, who is almost 21. He is at Uni but lives with me out of term time and sees his mum regularly.

During the separation, she moved to her parents, and from the day she left never came back, apart from an occassional visit to see our son or discuss things, but there was never an attempt to reconcile the relationship.

Later in 2022, I sold the house which was mortgaged in my name alone, and nothing was said/asked for at the time. In all the time we were together, this and my previous property was mortgaged by and paid for by me alone, as were all of the utility bills. By mid-2023, she had saved enough money herself for a deposit, and bought her own home, mortgaged solely in her name. So now, we are still separated and each own seperate properties/homes. We both have decent jobs in management, with staff pensions and some modest savings.

We have now agreed that after two and a half years seperated, that divorce is the rght thing to do, to draw a line under everything so we can both fully move on.

We have yet to agree on the finite details, but the feeling is we both simply want a divorce and a 'clean break', with no claim on eithers assets. She has also agreed to make it a joint divorce application and split the costs. I understand we should have a consent order drafted, with a clean break clause in it to protect each other in future. 

So question is, should this be a fairly simple/straightforward thing to do, and/or do we still need to provide full details of each others assets, salaries, etc if we are agreeing to 'go our separate ways' and not split anything?

Just trying to get my head around what the full process will be and the costs that may be involved for us (to split), and save for the cost of having a consent order drafted, we were both hoping to avoid unnecessary legal fees, hence trying to agree on retaining our own financial assets without needing to split anything.

Thanks for any advice offered.

Keep_pedalling

Well the starting point in such a long relationship is a 50/50 split of all assets which includes pensions. Do you ave a big disparity in your individual assets?  

mojo293

Keep_pedalling said:

Well the starting point in such a long relationship is a 50/50 split of all assets which includes pensions. Do you ave a big disparity in your individual assets?  

Not a huge disparity. My property is probably worth around £50k more than hers (similar area, 3 bed semi vs 2 bed end of terrace), I am probably on a slightly higher wage, but not massively. Not sure on what each others pensions would be worth yet, I don't have huge savings (small regular monthly amount to pay for holiday), assume she has simialr and I have a car, she doesn't drive.

Therefore, with things being relatively close, the feeling (I say that as we have yet to discuss it properly) is that we both just want to/are happy to walk way, with no claim on each other, particularly as we both own (mortgage) our own property now.

Additionally, we always had seperate bank accounts, credit cards, etc. So nothing joined financially. My credit cards (two of them) are both balance clear, no idea on hers.

lisyloo

Keep_pedalling said:

Well the starting point in such a long relationship is a 50/50 split of all assets which includes pensions. Do you ave a big disparity in your individual assets?  

unless both of you agree otherwise?

The court fee for divorce is £593 and you can apply direct on gov.uk
Yes you do have to provide ALL of your assets so there is no ambiguity/comeback.
The form will tell you everything you need to put down.
If either of you have a DB pension then it can take months to get a value from your pension company, so that is worth kicking off.
I think you can do your consent order DIY (templates available online) although it has to be properly drafted.
Otherwise there are plenty of companies offering to help for low fixed fees which may not be a bad idea to cover the risk of getting it wrong.
The fee for the the final order is £58.
So I think £593+£58 is the minimum costs but may be worth employing a company (few hundred) so the forms are all done correctly.

Just bear in mind that when people see big numbers on paper then they may change their mind.
Also be aware that everyone (professional plus family and friends) will strongly advise her to take what she's entitled to.

elsien

You may have houses for similar value, but if you had a larger part of the equity for a deposit  with yours because of the value of the property when sold it, that  could be a relevant factor.
your son is an adult so where he lives is not relevant to the financial split

Keep_pedalling

If your wife took several years out employment to look after your son then her pension could be considerably lower than yours. These are the sort of things people often don't think about at the time but can come back to bite you on the bum later.

mojo293

Cheers for the comments so far.

So as far as the financial agreement goes, the D81 form which sets out assets, etc, I guess the court uses that in order to makes sure that any split agreed and stated in the 'consent order' is fair.

So, if (and may yet be a big 'if') we both agreed to to walk away, nothing to share or split, both happy we don't want or need anything from each other now or in the future, and the consent order is written as such, is the D81 less relevant, even though it still has to be submitted? Or, could the courts still look and say one or the other of us should be getting something more, based on the D81, even though we've (potentially) stated we don't want it?

I also understand a comment above, that words said now may yet change once numbers are seen, so still hopeful we can keep things as amicable as possible going forward.

lisyloo

You need to put all your pensions down on the form, including a CE (cash equivalent) value for any defined benefit pensions so differences will show up.

Here's the D81 form.
D81 - Statement of information for a consent order in relation to a financial remedy (publishing.service.gov.uk)

elsien

The court could reject the agreement if they felt It was intrinsically unfair to one party or the other.

lisyloo

The D81 is absolutely not less relevant.
its essential that everything is clear and unambiguous to avoid future claims.

I doubt the courts would get involved (I know people who’ve agreed to take less) unless there was something looking quite dubious e.g. large disparity or not enough to live on 
I don’t think they’ll be interested in a relatively small disparity where both are relatively financially secure.

AskAsk

mojo293 said:

Cheers for the comments so far.

So as far as the financial agreement goes, the D81 form which sets out assets, etc, I guess the court uses that in order to makes sure that any split agreed and stated in the 'consent order' is fair.

So, if (and may yet be a big 'if') we both agreed to to walk away, nothing to share or split, both happy we don't want or need anything from each other now or in the future, and the consent order is written as such, is the D81 less relevant, even though it still has to be submitted? Or, could the courts still look and say one or the other of us should be getting something more, based on the D81, even though we've (potentially) stated we don't want it?

I also understand a comment above, that words said now may yet change once numbers are seen, so still hopeful we can keep things as amicable as possible going forward.

we were in the middle of completing the D81 form and getting the consent order drafted to submit to the court when there was a delay with the pension CETV so it had to be abandoned until we get the CETV.

but yes, you need to complete the D81 form and get a consent order drafted for the consent order application.

i found the D81 form was easy enough to complete, if not a little bit long winded, but you would need a solicitor or someone with legal knowledge to draft the consent order as the judge will need to sign it.  having a shoddy consent order will just be thrown out by the court as they don't amend it if it is drafted incorrectly.

The court will look at the details on the D81 form and determine if the drafted consent order is fair.  They may still override the couple's decision on the asset split if they do not agree that it is fair.  It does put the couple into a bit of a pickle if the court does this as what starts out as an amicable split may very well turn into an accrimonious one if the court decides to make its own decision on the financial split.

However, if it can be shown that the split is not unfair and that neither party is going to left without adequate provisions, I believe that the judge will not overrule the couple's agreement.

We have agreed the split and we have got a separation agreement in the mean time, which we will send in with the consent order application when we get round to that, and I hope the judge will not override our agreement, but I have said to my husband that if the judge overrides our decision, we just won't act on it as no one can force us to do anything if we both don't want to!