Stopping the backsliding… a family of four no longer living beyond their means

beanielou

Popsy dresses are the comfiest thing ever. They have pockets. As do their cardigans! 

Bluegreen143

I only buy comfortable dresses for that reason, and yes I wear a dress regardless of whether I’m WFH, in the office, out with the kids or meeting friends. I tend to shower sometime between 8.30-9.30pm and change into PJs or a nightie then (except if I’m out in the evening, obviously).

I wear flat laced ankle boots in the winter and in the summer either converse type trainers or sandals (I did have smarter work shoes but I’ve realised that nobody seems to care what shoes I wear in the office!). I’m not above wearing my walking boots or wellies with my dress if needed though. I don’t do heels now and don’t think I’ll ever go back! 

Floss

Have you looked on Vinted for your dresses? You can save searches set to your preferences & there are bargains to be had 😉

Bluegreen143

I never seem to get on with Vinted but I’m not averse to second hand, I do buy off eBay sometimes.

Love my coat and dress which came today. The kids’ new walking boots also came today and they’re happy with them. I got them both in black (Bambi’s have some pink touches) so they look less “hiking-y”. I’m not going to buy them normal/smarter boots this winter as last year they hardly wore them, both preferring to put on the comfier walking boots at all times. So I thought if they’re black they will look OK with all their clothes. They can wear their school shoes to look smart, and they do have wellies and trainers too. 

Sticking to just one pair for each type of shoe - ONE pair of boots each, ONE pair of wellies each etc - slightly helps in curbing the shoe clutter, though with four people in the house they do seem to still take up a lot of space?! I did laugh at how many shoes families tended to have on Sort Your Life Out, it seems like it’s a common struggle! 

Really pleased with how this weekend has turned out. I’ve been putting quite a bit of effort into planning our weekends since they went back to school and this one ticked a lot of boxes but cost hardly anything:

1. After work on Friday (I finish at 2.30 and everyone else was off as it’s a school holiday) we all went to a park for a walk/cycle ride for the kids. 

2. Saturday morning family brunch (platter with bacon, eggs, seeded bread, pancakes, fruit, HM guacamole)

3. Saturday day out - we took the kids to a local country park (parked outside it for free and walked in rather than pay for the car park there!). Had a lovely walk, went to the playpark, visited the brilliant (free) museum there. I splurged £8.50 on a little mini of whisky for Red from the gift shop but we took snacks so it was otherwise free. 

4. Saturday evening dinner then chiminea fire in the garden - we all played cards by the fire then I read the kids’ their bedtime stories beside it too. 

5. Sunday morning papers - this week I experimented with buying actual Sunday papers. Red and I had a very civilised time reading them together and chatting this morning. So much nicer than getting the news online (plus, since I gave up social media, I generally avoid the news altogether so was it nice to feel informed in a non-anxiety-provoking way).

6. Swimming - took the kids swimming and Monkey swam a full length for the first time! And when we went, they asked us to pay on the way out due to some issue their end. But then when we came out they said it was fine and not to bother, so we got to swim for free. I did pay £6 for a pool toy I bribed Monkey with to swim his length (this promised reward has been tantalising him for months 🤣). 

7. Roast chicken for Sunday dinner then apple crumble. 

So yes, a few costs - newspapers, little bottle of whiskey, pool toy, nicer food for the weekend. But it wasn’t a spendy weekend overall, and was one of the nicer ones we’ve had. 

FootyFanDan

It sounds like a very lovely weekend (and well planned ). We are currently in process of trying to get more family time in at the weekend. We always seem so busy with drama club for the little one or due to the after school clubs and all the travel school run includes we always end up just doing nothing on weekends which seem a waste!. I love how organised you are with everything

Bluegreen143

I’ve gotten many ideas for family bonding traditions from a parenting group I’ve been part of for years. They recommend starting with one and trying it for three months. So some of the ideas include a special family meal (we already do dinner together every night so that’s why I’m trying a weekend brunch as something different), a weekly walk, weekly campfire or games night, things like that. But the key is once you’ve thought of something new to try, then stick to it for three months before evaluating how it’s gone rather than trying to make lots of changes at once then forgetting them all. 

I’m not doing the fire thing or brunch weekly though, my aim is to do it whenever we have a quieter weekend so we skipped them when we had my birthday party or when I took the kids up north for the weekend. 

Sarahwithlove

I used to live in dresses before covid but since then like many people working from home, I hardly ever wear a dress anymore. You're making me want to get some for ease. I used to love chucking one on over leggings or tights. 

Bluegreen143

Just popping in to check in. Nothing too crazy to report, though I did spend £48 in Tesco today - £8 to replace Monkey’s water bottle which he left at Cub camp, £12 on leggings for me, £7.50 on a nice (big) autumn candle for the dining table as we’re out of candles, £20.50 on 2x hats and 3x gloves/mittens for each child.

I can’t be bothered going to check all the exact amounts on the receipt but I think the above estimate is fairly accurate and the total was definitely £48 😆.

I did also go to the library which was at least a tad more frugal. 

Made lovely pulled salsa chicken/sweet potato/black bean/rice burritos with HM guacamole and salad for dinner. Pleased with how tasty it all turned out especially as my friend joined us for dinner. The kids LOVED the burritos and even both had some of the adult ones once they finished theirs - the adult ones were exactly the same but with added jalapeños. I was really impressed actually - Monkey said he liked the jalapeño version, Bambi picked a few of hers out but still ate the bit of burrito happily. Big win!

I’m feeling a bit emotionally impacted and stressed about a situation between two of my friends (housemates with each other), who are having a very messy friendship/housemate breakup - tough when you feel caught in the middle and don’t want to to impact your own relationships with these people. I think I’m such a people pleaser and it just makes me anxious when other people don’t get on, which is ridiculous 🤦‍♀️. 

Floss

Bluegreen143 said:

I’m feeling a bit emotionally impacted and stressed about a situation between two of my friends (housemates with each other), who are having a very messy friendship/housemate breakup - tough when you feel caught in the middle and don’t want to to impact your own relationships with these people. I think I’m such a people pleaser and it just makes me anxious when other people don’t get on, which is ridiculous 🤦‍♀️. 

Probably best to take a little step back for now, while letting them both know individually that you're doing so and make plans with each of them. It's hard to stay Switzerland when one has friends who come out of being a couple.

GeorgianaCavendish

Hello! I've been reading through your diary over the last couple of days and you are doing so well - I love the recipes especially  

I noticed a few pages back that you posted about wanting to buy a new mattress in the next few months. I recently bought a new bed base and mattress using the Dreams and ClearCycle ebay stores. They were both "failed deliveries" where the original customer could not take delivery as they wouldn't fit in their house, but apparently they can't put them back in the stock rotation if that happens. We ended up with a 60% discount on the mattress and 65% discount on the bed base. I was so thrilled with this that I've been telling as many people as possible, I think my friends are bored of hearing about it now!