To sell up & rent, cash in and pay off debts

jonnydeppiwish!

You sound like you’ve been through the mill over the past few years, and well done for identifying the issues you have mentioned. 

You’ve said you’ve applied for 100s of jobs - are these all in you previous field of work? Could you look at alternatives such as shelf stacking at your local supermarket? Become a TA at a local school as this would help with child care when your child starts school? Your income from this, despite not being very large, would probably allow you to keep the house and get on top of the finances.

Good luck in whatever you decide though!

RAS

I'd second jonny, there have been a few curveballs in a short time, so a lot to absorb and deal with. This really isn't a housing issue, it's partly family, relationships and communication and partly debt management. My guess is that hubbie took out loans because he didn't feel he could add to the issues at the time but that's just delayed some curveballs?

Add to that the knock of your confidence re work and finding work. I'd agree again. Try to get anything because you become much more attractive to employers even if you are in a different role. And every penny you earn comes home, whereas many additional pennies that hubbie might earn would get diverted into tax and NI. Then look at other roles in that field where your previous experience would allow you to progress.

As a starting point, you and hubbie need to sit down with the last few year's statement and work out where the money has gone. Then put together an SOA together, check www.lemonfool.co.uk.

If you format for MSE and post that up on the debt free wannabee section of these forums, folk can advise your further. If those loans are unsecured, and they should be if your haven't also signed them, there are ways forward.

If you want additional advice, speak to national debtline or stepchange but don't rush into doing anything as their way of working can affect credit records longer than necessary. Also consider CAP and CAB.

_Penny_Dreadful

freshstart40 said:

As the tittle suggest I'm undecided on what to do, my situation seems to be going from bad to worse each day, week and I really need to make a decision for my families sake soon and without any support network I'm struggling to make the right decision or even come to one. 

A little bit of back ground below. We bought our house 15 years ago and have built up around £380k in equity, we bought in the last crash and have invested alot of hard sweat and tears into creating our family home which we love. 

I was made redundant in covid and then 2 weeks after found out I was expecting my 2nd child (my 1st is now 14) I went through a rough pregnancy mentally and physically and sought help for pnd, my 2nd child is amazing but didn't sleep for well over a year, we struggled as a family, my partner has his own business and worked alot outdoors and couldn't help with night feeds and picking up responsibilities for our other child as he was too tired, I feel I may of had a breakdown in between then and now. I've been actively interviewing at companies since my daughter was 9 months old! I'm still actively looking and have competed against 200 plus applications on various roles, I've around 20 main interviews in that period and most are 4 stages in total, with presentations and tasks to prepare and complete. I've been 2nd place more times than I can recall and haven't secured a role yet still, I've applied for 100s, half the pay, different sectors and now it's 3 years later and I'm I've taken such a knock on my confidence it's untrue, I was the bread winner and had a really secure and stable work history before being made redundant in covid and its impacted so badly on my health to keep trying and not getting anywhere. 

My daughter suffered from severe reflux and couldn't take milk normally so I spent the first 12 months holding her in a sling as she was in so much discomfort until she could handle adult medication, luckily she is now absolutely fine and we spend our days trying to keep busy and I interview whilst she sleeps and juggle applying for jobs whilst she plays. I have no family support and can not afford for her to go nursery. 

I've felt like I've failed so much, it's unreal.. I feel like there just isn't any hope in this job market, it seems to be getting worse and I'm so tired of the process and drained already with life in general. 

My partner has also told me that he wanted to remortgage to clear his mounting debts as he has stacked up over 60k on various things which he says is to do with renovation work on our property and a holiday and various bits. It doesn't add up really but we can't remortgage on his salary alone as we got the house on my previous salary but it is in both our name. 

So I got the house valued thinking we could sell, clear some of the debt, I'm not in agreement to clear all, I have taken my own debts on to support my own financial commitments since having my 2nd child, this equates to 11k now. 

I had savings when I had my 2nd and paid my half for around 1 and half years so within the last 18 months my partner has fully supported the house but obviously not my loan, phone, insurances etc. I'm at breaking point and can't see the wood through the trees when he told me about the loans, I'd told him not to get them.

Anyway, things have spiralled really quickly and I've not been in the right frame of mind with post natal depression, financial stress and no support, not being able to secure a job has just been a nightmare.

I was thinking that with our mortgage going up recently we should sell, we could make upto £380k if lucky, and clear some not all of those debts and rent for a few years whilst we take the pressure off. The payments of loans are now more than the mortgage, with not finding a job soon we can't remortgage to clear them into the mortgage and our life is suffering. 

Renting will be 400 more amonth, I'm thinking of retraining into something completely different and starting from scratch. 

Do I sound mad, or would this be a serious option you would consider. I'm sorry if I've rambled on alot, there are certain elements I wanted to include. There is lots more. I appreciate any feedback. 

This is my tuppence worth.

I would not sell my home to go into rented accommodation unless it was the absolute last resort.  If you think things are stressful now just wait until your only ever 12 months away from a section 21 notice.

I also would not sell my house to use the equity to pay off what I assume are unsecured debts.  It's too similar to debt consolidation where people don't tackle the route cause of their debt, take out a loan to "pay off" their debts whilst continuing to spend, spend, spend on their credit cards only to find themselves maxed out once again but this time owning twice the amount.  You said that your husband's explanation for £60,000 of debt doesn't make sense so that is even more reason not to rush into selling the family home.

I agree with @RAS, I think the best thing for you to do is to put together an honest statement of affairs for the household, format is for MSE, and post it on the Debt Free Wannabe board.

https://www.lemonfool.co.uk/financecalculators/soa.php