Divorce, Children, House - HELP!

T.T.D

She wouldn’t have entitlement to housing benefit under universal credit. You’re paying the mortgage and council tax. 

There used to be a thing called SMI (Support For Mortgage Interest) where you could get 3.16% interest rate on up-to £200.000 on a £250k max mortgage and paid direct to the lender, as she isn’t the mortgage holder she wouldn’t be entitled on Universal Credit of up-to £526.66 per month, this is a loan and is paid back from any transfer or sale of the house (unless the mortgage is moved over to another property). But I digress.

Child maintenance payments are formulated on your income, you can formulate this yourself on a benefits calculator and pay direct into her bank account each month (child maintenance would only ask that you pay direct first anyway, before then collecting from you or from your employer to deduct wages) I would do this asap to avoid any back pay you could potentially owe.

CMS is paid to the age of 16 if that child leaves full time education payments should stop being made, if the child stays in full time/higher education it is paid to the age of 21 when they age out legally.

You should also check to see if you need to pay spousal maintenance, you may be ordered to pay this by a family court, you say your incomes are greatly different and although she has a part time job, this may not supplement enough. On the Flip side you say you pay all the household bills, Mortgage-Council Tax-Home insurance-Phone-broadband-unsecured and secured debt. 

If you paying her named only loans and she isn’t making contributions to this on-top of car finance and she is benefitting from her income and living “as debt free” from your income, there is a good argument to the court not to pay directly spousal maintenance, unlike child maintenance spousal maintenance has no set formula to be worked out from, it’s a case by case assessment made at court.

The only down side to spousal maintenance and based on your income, you can be made to pay beyond divorce settlement where by it only stops in the event of remarrying or death it can also be set to expire on a decree absolute depends on very tailored circumstances by a court. 

Could she afford the mortgage? Would you be willing to sell the house to her if she can mortgage it herself?

We don’t know your circumstances (and I’m sure she’s not a council house snob as you describe) but are the children in really good rated schools a 14-15yr would be doing their GCSE coursework moving school or uprooting to a new house and or area would be detrimental to their educational needs right now.
Are they getting, receiving or about to receive special additional needs at school not available in another school, are they in a diagnosis process or treatment process or receiving treatment only available in this health board area?

Her being made homeless or about to be would place her in a Band A on the local housing register, she would have to accept what ever is available to her that is offered by the local authority or social housing provider or be place on a black list for a 12 month with no prospect of getting an offer in that time if she refused a property. The best she could hope for is Band B where she could potentially reject a property 3 times with valid reasons of unsuitability and then wait in perpetuity depending on area selected. 

I do think that now your financial circumstances has changed you should seek help to see if your debt management would warrant revisiting for DRO to Bankruptcy status or something in between to try and write off some of your debt. Citizens advice would be best suited for this. Perhaps this could also be something your ex could benefit from also?

I think mediation maybe a benefit (if it’s appropriate). Going to court should be the last resort for help to split things up and decide on housing related matters and debt. 

As others have said Wikivorce is a place to start.

Caz3121

T.T.D said:

CMS is paid to the age of 16 if that child leaves full time education payments should stop being made, if the child stays in full time/higher education it is paid to the age of 21 when they age out legally.

re the definition of higher education - this would not be University and maintenance stops on 20th birthday

from gov site "Your child needs to be under 16 - or under 20 if they are in full-time education, up to and including A level or equivalent."

Stateofart

3133chris said:

We all currently live in a mortgaged house (although I am currently sleeping on a family members sofa), which is in my sole name (deed and mortgage), and I financially pay every single bill in the house.  We have a lot of debt (secured and unsecured), and I am in a debt management plan to try to manage this, but as per the mortgage everything is in my name.

Move back in is my advice.  Proceedings tend to drag on without a bit of pressure to come to amicable agreements.  Remember, this is your house too.

3133chris said:

My wife believes that I should just 'make it work', and leave her and the children in the house, with me still paying the mortgage and bills etc. - whilst that may be great for the children, it leaves me basically homeless, and with nowhere to take them at weekends etc. when I would have them. 

Yes this happens a lot.  Move back in.

3133chris said:

2. Do I have to provide and pay for a house for her and the children to live in on top of the child maintenance payments?

I'm not sure you absolutely have to.  If she wants the house, she will possibly need to earn enough to cover it.  Your obligations are to your child support payments, however the trouble is you will ideally need to be off the mortgage as you cannot be sure your partner will be paying and ultimately you'll be on the hook for it.  

Like a lot of these situations, it'll come down to what a judge wants.  The chances are he won't want to upset the family home until kids are 18 (which is understandable), however you cannot be expected to pay for that home on top of your own.  You may need to come off the mortgage, get a equity percentage now (divide by two for your share) and when she comes to sell when kids are 18 and she's forced to sell, you get your money back plus the rise in value.  This is all well and good, but the bank won't agree unless she can afford it.  

It sounds like she's banking on you leaving her in the house and continuing to pay...if that's the case, prepare for the brakes to be firmly pushed on.  If you are not friendly to each other now, I've seen things like this to escalate to horrendous accusations, all for money and a place to live, so be careful.  If she can work full time or find another way, she can buy you out now I suppose, but that's quite rare.

elsien

Stateofart said:

3133chris said:

We all currently live in a mortgaged house (although I am currently sleeping on a family members sofa), which is in my sole name (deed and mortgage), and I financially pay every single bill in the house.  We have a lot of debt (secured and unsecured), and I am in a debt management plan to try to manage this, but as per the mortgage everything is in my name.

Move back in is my advice.  Proceedings tend to drag on without a bit of pressure to come to amicable agreements.  Remember, this is your house too.

3133chris said:

My wife believes that I should just 'make it work', and leave her and the children in the house, with me still paying the mortgage and bills etc. - whilst that may be great for the children, it leaves me basically homeless, and with nowhere to take them at weekends etc. when I would have them. 

Yes this happens a lot.  Move back in.

3133chris said:

2. Do I have to provide and pay for a house for her and the children to live in on top of the child maintenance payments?

I'm not sure you absolutely have to.  If she wants the house, she will possibly need to earn enough to cover it.  Your obligations are to your child support payments, however the trouble is you will ideally need to be off the mortgage as you cannot be sure your partner will be paying and ultimately you'll be on the hook for it.  

Like a lot of these situations, it'll come down to what a judge wants.  The chances are he won't want to upset the family home until kids are 18 (which is understandable), however you cannot be expected to pay for that home on top of your own.  You may need to come off the mortgage, get a equity percentage now (divide by two for your share) and when she comes to sell when kids are 18 and she's forced to sell, you get your money back plus the rise in value.  This is all well and good, but the bank won't agree unless she can afford it.  

It sounds like she's banking on you leaving her in the house and continuing to pay...if that's the case, prepare for the brakes to be firmly pushed on.  If you are not friendly to each other now, I've seen things like this to escalate to horrendous accusations, all for money and a place to live, so be careful.  If she can work full time or find another way, she can buy you out now I suppose, but that's quite rare.

Not the case. Any court will take account that both parties needs have to be met fairly, as well as the children, and if the OP needs money to get somewhere to live now then it is by no means a foregone conclusion that the children and wife  will be able to stay till they are 18. 

GDB2222

It’s disappointing that the system is so obscure that people really have very little idea of what the courts will decide.