Help buying a grave plot

Flugelhorn

elsien said:

If you can’t afford for your mum to be buried, then I would look at the cremation option and put her ashes in the grave. Officially or not. 

agree - these days that is by far the best option if people want to have graves together 

DullGreyGuy

elsien said:

If you can’t afford for your mum to be buried, then I would look at the cremation option and put her ashes in the grave. Officially or not. 

But they say they were buried on the 7 Feb... to exhume the body to then cremate it would be a lot of paperwork!

If you already own a family plot I don't understand fully what the additional charge is for? Clearly they've allowed the burial to happen and seems only to be the headstone thats triggering the cost? If its a family site can you not just replace one of the existing stones to commemorate the two people?

BoGoF

I'm not understanding either. Where I am you have to 'own' the plot before you can have a burial. The fact that 2 family members have already been interred there would suggest someone in the family has bought the plot at some point and title deeds should be held somewhere?

elsien

DullGreyGuy said:

elsien said:

If you can’t afford for your mum to be buried, then I would look at the cremation option and put her ashes in the grave. Officially or not. 

But they say they were buried on the 7 Feb... to exhume the body to then cremate it would be a lot of paperwork!

If you already own a family plot I don't understand fully what the additional charge is for? Clearly they've allowed the burial to happen and seems only to be the headstone thats triggering the cost? If it’s a family site can you not just replace one of the existing stones to commemorate the two people?

They actually said the funeral was on the seventh. Not that they were buried on the seventh.

I was presuming that they’d had a service of some sort but the other issues had delayed things. Just because it seems odd to be able to be buried in the plot that you don’t own.

MikeJXE

The cheapest plot is in your own garden or on a friends land 

DullGreyGuy

elsien said:

DullGreyGuy said:

elsien said:

If you can’t afford for your mum to be buried, then I would look at the cremation option and put her ashes in the grave. Officially or not. 

But they say they were buried on the 7 Feb... to exhume the body to then cremate it would be a lot of paperwork!

If you already own a family plot I don't understand fully what the additional charge is for? Clearly they've allowed the burial to happen and seems only to be the headstone thats triggering the cost? If it’s a family site can you not just replace one of the existing stones to commemorate the two people?

They actually said the funeral was on the seventh. 

Never been to a funeral that didnt include the interment or cremation... wakes etc are different 

MobileSaver

MikeJXE said:

The cheapest plot is in your own garden or on a friends land 

I disagree as I suspect the negative impact on the house price when when it's eventually sold on would make even the most expensive official plot cost seem like pocket change...

Savvy_Sue

BoGoF said:

I'm not understanding either. Where I am you have to 'own' the plot before you can have a burial. The fact that 2 family members have already been interred there would suggest someone in the family has bought the plot at some point and title deeds should be held somewhere?

Not only that, but worth noting that the plot

• is usually only 'owned' for a fixed period of time
• can only be 'owned' by one person, not several family members
• wouldn't include a headstone

It's possible it's just the cost of the headstone the OP is concerned about. Whoever owns the plot would need to give permission for that, and so would the cemetery owners. It's possible they have 'preferred providers'. 

Marcon

Savvy_Sue said:

BoGoF said:

I'm not understanding either. Where I am you have to 'own' the plot before you can have a burial. The fact that 2 family members have already been interred there would suggest someone in the family has bought the plot at some point and title deeds should be held somewhere?

Not only that, but worth noting that the plot

• is usually only 'owned' for a fixed period of time
• can only be 'owned' by one person, not several family members
• 
  

It can be 'owned' jointly see eg https://www.folkestone-hythe.gov.uk/cemeteries-burials-memorials/hawkinge-cemetery/2#:~:text=In%20the%20case%20of%20joint,equal%20responsibilities%20for%20memorials%20etc.

specifically

When you purchase a burial plot, you will be issued with a Deed of Grant of Exclusive Right of Burial. This document needs to be kept in a safe place as you may need to provide it in the future. As the owner your permission will be required to open the plot at any time and to sign for any memorials placed on the plot. In the case of joint ownership, all owners will be required to give their consent. Up to a maximum of four people may be joint owners of the Exclusive Right of Burial, allowing them all the automatic right to be buried in the plot (space dependent) and have equal responsibilities for memorials etc.

Savvy_Sue

Marcon said:

Savvy_Sue said:

BoGoF said:

I'm not understanding either. Where I am you have to 'own' the plot before you can have a burial. The fact that 2 family members have already been interred there would suggest someone in the family has bought the plot at some point and title deeds should be held somewhere?

Not only that, but worth noting that the plot

• is usually only 'owned' for a fixed period of time
• can only be 'owned' by one person, not several family members
• 
  

It can be 'owned' jointly see eg https://www.folkestone-hythe.gov.uk/cemeteries-burials-memorials/hawkinge-cemetery/2#:~:text=In%20the%20case%20of%20joint,equal%20responsibilities%20for%20memorials%20etc.

specifically

When you purchase a burial plot, you will be issued with a Deed of Grant of Exclusive Right of Burial. This document needs to be kept in a safe place as you may need to provide it in the future. As the owner your permission will be required to open the plot at any time and to sign for any memorials placed on the plot. In the case of joint ownership, all owners will be required to give their consent. Up to a maximum of four people may be joint owners of the Exclusive Right of Burial, allowing them all the automatic right to be buried in the plot (space dependent) and have equal responsibilities for memorials etc.

Marcon said:

Savvy_Sue said:

BoGoF said:

I'm not understanding either. Where I am you have to 'own' the plot before you can have a burial. The fact that 2 family members have already been interred there would suggest someone in the family has bought the plot at some point and title deeds should be held somewhere?

Not only that, but worth noting that the plot

• is usually only 'owned' for a fixed period of time
• can only be 'owned' by one person, not several family members
• 
  

It can be 'owned' jointly see eg https://www.folkestone-hythe.gov.uk/cemeteries-burials-memorials/hawkinge-cemetery/2#:~:text=In%20the%20case%20of%20joint,equal%20responsibilities%20for%20memorials%20etc.

specifically

When you purchase a burial plot, you will be issued with a Deed of Grant of Exclusive Right of Burial. This document needs to be kept in a safe place as you may need to provide it in the future. As the owner your permission will be required to open the plot at any time and to sign for any memorials placed on the plot. In the case of joint ownership, all owners will be required to give their consent. Up to a maximum of four people may be joint owners of the Exclusive Right of Burial, allowing them all the automatic right to be buried in the plot (space dependent) and have equal responsibilities for memorials etc.

Ah thanks. It possibly varies from one place to another: in both my parents' and my in-laws' burial areas it's only one person.